¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ profile picture

¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

Thundercats

All my life who am I? I dont know. Do you?Does anyone really know who they are? Why does it matter? Ive lived my whole life wondering who I am, guess i dont need to know....I used to be in control of my life. I used to think everything was static. Then my whole world came crashing down around my head an i didnt even have the sense to get out of the way. Im trying desperatly to pick up the peices of myself and rebuild but just like some half forgotten nightmare the past worms its way back into my daily life.
Im learning to cope though and making some headway into a better me, hell im miles away from where i was just two years ago! Got my own car and my own place, new friends and a few old. Im back in touch after eight years with one of the sweetest people ive ever met.( Thanks Erin!! )I get to see my boys everyday,...almost. I work so friggin much you wouldnt believe! Yet somehow in spite of all of this i still think about the void. The dark spot that ate my soul. Some times when i look in the mirror i se the face of injustice and shame smile sardoniclly back at me as if silently accusing,...or maybe its just me.
Perhaps I just answered the question concerning who I am,....

My Interests

Japanese Fencing, Im taking Jujitsu classes now so go me,...long walks off shot peirs, sleeping with fish, getting fit for concrete sneakers ect ect... I love to play games, im a very competative person. I recently had to give up my video games obsession so that i could have a normal life for awhile.

I'd like to meet:

I would really like to meet the person I could have been. Oh what a tragic meeting of two lost souls! One cursed with non-existance and the other damned by the sins of the faultless. What a pair we would make, hand in hand watching our world burn to cinders with the taste of blood and ash in our mouths. Would the man i could have been find the man i have become grotesque and obsolete? Would he shun me for my vile depredations? Would he welcome me?
Would You??

Music:

Dio, SIXX AM, Anthrax, Ozzy, Lamb of God, Prince (yes i said Prince, Jimmi Hendrix, Dark Lotus, Pantera, Dethklok, Type O Negative, Moonspell, 38 Special, Skynard, Rob/White Zombie and on and on and on.....

Movies:

Anything with Sonney Chiba, Seven Samurai, Star Wars (recognize!), Super Troopers, How High, Dont be a Menace to South Central While Drinkin Your Juice in da Hood, Robin Hood Men in Tights, Young Frankenstein, ANY werewolf movie, Dog Soldiers, Bad Moon,....Too many to mention,.....

Television:

No Reservations with Andrew Bourdain, you dont like it then dont watch it,...

Heroes:

"All my Heros are Dead in Hollywood"
..
www.wishafriend.com

My Blog

wItHoUt fOrM

Without Form   Milk white flesh, a razor blade, crimson scars that never fade Exposed wrist, an open vein, Hangmans hood, a speeding train, Death came to me not unlike a friend Death came to me w...
Posted by ¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ on Fri, 30 May 2008 10:38:00 PST

rEcLaiMaTiOn oF tHe sElF

Reclaimation of the Self Where am i? What is this place? Am i an insect crawling on the planets face? Did i wander here from beyond the stars? Was my fall to Earth the cause of all these scars? How ca...
Posted by ¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ on Fri, 30 May 2008 10:25:00 PST

i WiLl dEnY mY rOlE aS a HuMaN bEiNg, hOlDiNg mYsElF HoStAgE wItH nO dEmAnDs

  hApPy nOw Here i lie broken and abused Here I lie lost dead and used Lifeless monster body rejects the brain never shown love only hate and refrain open my flesh with blades of ice to will me b...
Posted by ¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ on Fri, 30 May 2008 10:15:00 PST

sWeAr oN yOur lIfE tHaT nO oNe WiLl CrY aT mY fUnErAl

Here goes. My friend Erin has offered me a place to stay in Amarillo till i can get my own apt. On the other hand Joey B is asking to pay to move me to Louisiana. I dont know what to do. I have to lea...
Posted by ¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ on Mon, 26 May 2008 10:22:00 PST

aNd wHeN tHe dAy ArRiVeS iLl bEcOmE tHe sEa

i cant wait to die so that all this hurt will just go away. when im dead ill be in good company so im not so afraid any more,.....
Posted by ¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ on Sat, 24 May 2008 09:29:00 PST

wHaT hAvE i bEcOmE mY sWeEtEsT fRiEnD

well life pretty much blows. i thought i had all this being a grown up shit figured out but nooooo along comes a woman. not just any woman mind you, the PERFECT woman. I used her and abused her and in...
Posted by ¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ on Sat, 24 May 2008 05:25:00 PST

aLl mY lIfE wHo aM I

Im not really sure what to write here but here goes. I hate my life. I hate myself. Hell I even hate you to some degree or another. I guess im just full of hate and self loathing. What the hell is wro...
Posted by ¤bRoKeN iNsIdE¤ on Fri, 23 May 2008 04:12:00 PST