About Me
BIOGRAPHY OF JOOSEPPI A.K.A ISAKAR THE BOMBASTIC (A.K.A THE WAKA-WAKA WIZARD)
Jooseppi, or Isakar the Bombastic, was a lesser known member of the Order of the Wizards of the Third Age. Most of his life in the 3rd age was spent in the cold north and various other lands across great mountains, seas, and deserts. He rarely had time to attend the meetings of his order, and quite frankly, found them "fookin' boring," although there was great mutual respect between him and the other wizards.
Being a wizard, Isakar was supposed to leave the realm of mortal men a long time ago. Being a great fan of the Jalopeno of the Pepper Family, he had indulged, to say the least, on what he had planned to be his last night on earth. And oh did he pay a great price the next morning. Hurrying to catch the last boat to the Lands of Un-Death, he had to make numerous stops in the woods to relieve his pain, and consequently missed the boat. "Ah well, fuck it!," he thought, "I'll just stick around for a few thousand years longer.
Even though his name is rarely known amongst mortals, his legend has not been completely flushed down the memory hole of the collective consciousness. Even you might have heard stories about him. During the long periods spent in the North East he was on numerous occasions seen dressed in red and white* riding a reindeer, encouraging the animal to take a leap, and then just miss the ground. He had a strong conviction that he could teach them to fly. He was well liked and brought people joy in the darkest of times. Disheartened by mortals starting to have morbid fascinations for gory stories emanating from the south, he quit this hobby. Stories of philosophers dying horrible deaths nailed to crosses and so on.
Jooseppi may have also contributed to the northern legend of a mighty man-like being carrying a weird stringed instrument made of a giant pike's jaw bone. There are also rumors circulating that he was a member of the order of ? ß p (Eta Beta Pi). He may also have played a part in the anarchist mobilization in the Spanish civil war.
Isakar the Bombastic is planning to finally leave this realm when a narrow opportunity, a rare galactic alignment, arises around the time of the Winter Solstice in the year 2012. A star gate, a worm hole, a way out.
It has now come the time to spread the word of this great wizard. Be on the lookout for "Chronicles of Jooseppi Part I: Snakes Of Ze Underveld" in late 2009.
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