9599243

Please see my newest project located in my blog, entitled "Mysteries of the Bipolar Bear."
Hello all. My name is Meghan and I am 26 years old. I moved to Northern VA to get a real person job, which took me from a sales job to government contracting. I have since moved to Rockville, MD and am coming to the realization that my life is becoming monotonous and meaningless. Needless to say, I detest being a real person.
I aspire to become something of significance involving writing and producing random crap, whether it be film, book, or handicraft related. I am currently freelance writing for a men's online magazine (purestyledc.com) because this allows me to be more offensive and unleash my creative juices on the world...that's what she said. I guess you can say I am at that crossroads in my life where I can either settle down, get married, have spawn, and work at the same monotonous job for the rest of my life...or I can harness my creativity and try to make something of myself. I think the latter sounds much more appealing.
I graduated from the University of Pittsburgh with a dual degree in Business and Communications, pulling the 5 year plan because I started off as an engineer and an alcoholic. I am no longer an engineer and I am no longer an alcoholic...but I'm sure I could still go shot for shot with a 300 lb man.
Speaking of shots...I shot out of my mother's womb in Mountainview, California on the morning of October 14th, 1982. I was the product of a bottle of Grand Marnier, a hot tub, and streaking...needless to say...don't drink and bathe or you could have spawn like me... I have lived in Milpitas and San Jose, California, Mt. Clemens, Michigan, Andover, Minnesota, Waynesboro and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Fairfax and Alexandria, Virginia, and now Rockville, Maryland. To the mulleted I am a world traveler.
The best word one could use to describe me is "excentric." I am a dreamer and a firm believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason. If you want something bad enough, you need to make an effort, regardless of the consequences. My new mantra in life is "What's the worst that could happen?" I am also a hippie liberal douche, and believe in doing things for the greater good of humanity. I don't believe one person is anymore entitled to anything on this earth than another person. I will admit that Barack Obama's win and speech afterwards made me cry like a little baby, especially when I realized I will no longer have to listen to people mispronounce "nuclear."
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Meghan K AKA P is for Pterodactyl AKA Crazy Meghan AKA Romans AKA Useless Vag.
Birthday: October 14, 1982 (See above)
Birthplace: Mountain View, CA (Again, see above)
Current Location: Rockville, MD
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: I have decided to take the plunge and go auburn for the next 28-30 shampoos. When I don't exercise I find no reason to wash my hair, so this hue could last months, even years.
Height: 5'7"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right handed, although I wish I were ambidextrous like my halfbreed bastard son
Your Heritage: Well I fill out "Caucasian" on the scantrons (although my mom thinks we're Native American because we were born in America), but if you want to get technical, I'm Irish, Polish, Swedish, French, and German. Secretly Daphne and I really with we were Mexican...or Amish.
The Shoes You Wore Today: Heels because I am at work
Your Weakness: Nerds, people who know how to speak in OLDE English, people with an extensive vocabulary, weirdos, people who know South Park quotes, boxed wine, people who watch awful movies merely for entertainment purposes(Glitter, Paris Hilton movies, and Teen Sorcery don't count because they're just bad), pirates, Holy Diver, the Hobbit VHSs or the Pied Piper of Hamelin, people who think I have brilliant ideas, and people who use any of the following phrases/words to describe fornication and/or intimate moments: fornication, twig of sin, innards, upper or lower extremities, salival exchange, extras, or particulars
Your Fears: Sharks, Francois Salon, the twig of sin, and the dark because when I was little my dad climbed a ladder up to my window and said he was the Boogie Man, and threatened to kill me if I didn't go to sleep. It scarred me for life.
Your Perfect Pizza: Pizza with only rhubarb on it, or only imported danish ham....in fact, because of imported danish ham, Daphne are going to start a multi-million dollar business called "Domestic Handicrafts by Imported Ethnic People"..if you would like to see the sketch pad, please inquire within
Goals You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Getting into grad school, enjoying a life of creativity as opposed to monotony, taking over Mexopotamia and turning it into an amusement park, Go to Arizona just to recreate a scene from Smoke Signals, Write a book with my dad entitled "A Corporate Guide to Human Interaction," starting my screen-play, ordering a mail-order husband (just to see if I can get away with shipping them UPS ground), writing "Reasons Why I Won't Date You" (which I am actually doing), and helping Daphne conquer her fear of the Pittsburgh Aviary
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: "WWBD" "I KNNNNNOW" "Holy Diver, you've been down too long in the midnight Sea" "CRAP!" "Spectacular" "that is awful" "I'll see you in 10 minutes" "Ebonics is to American English as Pirate is to Olde English" "let's climb the pinnacle, fell the tree, cross the chasm, and go to the Plateau before we get ravaged by the allosaurous getting his gizzard bitten off by the brontosaurous or the ape man and the monkey who doesn't care" "Never drop into the jowls of a mammoth" "you know what I love more than Hobbit VHSs" "May I please speak to Joseph Smith?" "I may or may not have" "And/or" "I'm so confused!" "Were you a whore last night?" "Oh man...girl that sucks...she sucks so bad, but not as bad as that girl that sucks more than the girl that sucks, and no one sucks as bad as that bitch" "he has Jacob Edward Weinstein Hair" "That boy is so pissed off" "fornication equals procreation and I'M not ready to have kids yet" "Hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey" "Bye bye bye bye bye bye" "I'm bringing the Moffats Back" "That's what she said" "You disgust me" "That's hat she said" "I'm a Hippie Liberal Douche and you are a Yuppie Conservative Dildo" or "Hey, do you want to see a picture of us at the beach"
Thoughts First Waking Up: Weekdays: "I don't want to go to work" Weekends:"What in the hell happened last night...and why am I not wearing any pants?"
Your Best Physical Feature: Eyes and my left arm because those are the features my half-breed bastard son got from me, also my left leg because it has been accosted in the past
Your Bedtime: Usually around 10...weekends it's between 3-7am, but it's getting more difficult as I age
Your Most Missed Memory: College...too many memories to list
Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi generally...unless there is a prize involved...except all I win is a new coke, and I hate it because it makes my teeth feel weird...I also hate styrofoam for a similar reason
MacDonalds or Burger King: Weinerschnitzel
Single or Group Dates: What is a date?
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: I.C. Light
Chocolate or Vanilla: Halfbreed
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee because it seems to fuel my creative tendencies
Do you Smoke: I haven't had 1 cigaretto since October 4, 2002
Do you Swear: Yes, but I try to do it in a sophisticated manner when I am not in a bad mood...I pretty much always swear when I'm talking about work
Do you Sing: Yes...Especially when I am in the car by myself at night. I always stop when I'm at a red light though...I also love karaoke when I am drunk, specifically "Me and Bobby Magee," "These Boots Were Made for Walkin'," and "Time After Time"...or perhaps Holy Diver in the corner of William Penn Tavern every hour on the quarter of an hour at the top of my lungs...headbanging with J.S. and being complemented on the creative choreography
Do you Shower Daily: Yes...unless I am drunk still and I forget
Have you Been in Love: No, but I have been in lust quite a few times
Do you want to go to College: I just graduated from college...Maybe grad school will be in my future one day, since my new company will pay for it
Do you want to get Married: Yes, merely to find an excuse to buy numerous kegs of Natural Light, have a karaoke machine instead of a band or DJ, and watch my friends get black out drunk...or else I could just have a party...
Do you belive in yourself: Yes. I also believe in Giant Gila Monsters, and Yanni causing all of the economic problems in India
Do you get Motion Sickness: Only when my parents shook me when I was a baby
Do you think you are Attractive: Only when I am not wearing zippers and/or buttons
Are you a Health Freak: Surprisingly, yes....after gaining the Freshman 20, I decided to start eating vegetables and running marathons. Now I exercise even on vacation, but it doesn't stop me from having a Grand Slam breakfast at Dennys
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes, they are the greatest people in the world...stay tuned for my next book "The Wrath of My Teenage Daughter"
Do you like Thunderstorms: Love them, unless I am running in the midst of one, then I get scared. Sometimes Joey-Ransom Spider gets scared and crawls into bed with me, then he tries to ransom my pillows for $26 a piece....I think he must get that from his OTHER mother...
Do you play an Instrument: I play air guitar most often, but sometimes I do try to play real guitar...I used to play the violin, but when I was 7, we had a recital, and when I was "playing" the bow didn't hit the strings once, so my parents shunned me and made me quit...then came piano for 8 years...and of course everybody's favorite instrument...the recorder....I really want to play as well as the Pied Piper of Hamelin
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes...and I am currently experiencing a hangover
In the past month have you Smoked: Does hukkah count?
In the past month have you been on Drugs: If by drugs you mean a giant elephant, and if by "been on" you mean "made sweet love to" then no...well I guess that's a no in general
In the past month have you gone on a Date: I cannot do this until I finish writing my book...unless for research purposes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes, and I can't afford to eat now
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: An entire box in one sitting...that's disgusting!
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yep, at Cafe Asia for Janet's birthday dinner...I may have been dressed up like a girl, but I spent the entire time telling dirty jokes
In the past month have you been on Stage: Does singing DIO at the top of your lungs while headbanging and playing extreme air guitar while everybody in the bar stares at you count?
In the past month have you been Dumped: I guess I would have to have a boyfriend to get dumped...but alas...Daphne and I will never have boyfriends because we're too weird...I guess that's why she is now a lesbian grandmother
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: I have not done that since the summer and it was a pretty unwise decision...I somehow lost my bathing suit to the point where we walked back to Daphne's house from that awful after-party in only towels...We should have just left with that boy Jan
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No, I am no longer a vandal. The last thing I stole was the Book of Mormon by J.S. from a hotel room for J.S.
Ever been Drunk: Let's see...from the last day of school in 8th grade until now...no...
Ever been called a Tease: Fornication equals procreation and I'm not ready to have spawn yet, therefore...yes
Ever been Beaten up: In 3rd grade by a boy named Chad...then I ro-sham-boed him and he moved away a week later
Ever Shoplifted: Yes..it used to be a regular thing in 9th grade amongst the crew...until one of our friends got caught stealing make-up from CVS
>How do you want to Die: What a morbid question...I don't know how I want to go, but I hope before that last breath of air leaves my body I have enough energy to raise the roof
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Ronnie James Dio's wife...an entrepreneur...the orbs will be pantented soon enough...a writer for South Park
What country would you most like to Visit: Amish
In a Boy/Girl..
Favorite Eye Color: Amish
Favourite Hair Color: Brown, under an Amish hat...with an Amish beard
Short or Long Hair: Short hair, medium-length beard...not wizard-like
Height: Amish
Weight: Thin, yet muscular from all of the Amish barn raisin
Best Clothing Style: Anything without buttons or zippers
Number of Drugs I have taken: You're Amish...you can't take drugs..."Amish people are Catholic"-J.S.
Number of CDs I own: I want to meet someone who loves CDs, but hates music, and loves shrimp stuffed with crab-meat. If not Amish, a 52 year old Blackfoot Indian would be OK also.
Number of Piercings: On me? 5..
Number of Tattoos: 0, but I am thinking about getting one of the diarama of us at the beach but on my left upper extremity(arm)
Number of things in my Past I Regret: From birth I'd probably give a rough estimate of between 12-33.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
Clearly this has not been updated and likely won't be: I have decided to feature different slideshows from my life post getting a digital camera, and I am tired, so I am starting off with just one, but more will be coming...Enjoy my first one...I call it 2004:
| View Show | Create Your Own 2004..
Myspace Layouts - Solid Colors Myspace Layouts
Myspace Codes - Myspace Generators - Myspace Backgrounds