When they come downstairs from their Ivory Towers, Idealists are very apt to walk straight into the gutter.
Logan Pearsall Smith
That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
A. Whitney Brown
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
Mark Twain
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
Peter Ustinov
No good deed goes unpunished
Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.
Frank Zappa
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
Mel Brooks
Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.
H. L. Mencken
I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability.
Oscar Wilde
Don't stay long when the husband is not at home.
Japanese Proverb
Drop out of school before your mind rots from our mediocre educational system.
Frank Zappa
People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first.
David H. Comins
A woman is like a cup of tea; you'll never know how strong she is until she boils - English proverb
Happy wife, happy life. - English proverb
Hindsight is 20/20 - English proverb
Many a true word is spoken in jest - English proverb
Mirrors do everything we do, but they cannot think for themselves. - English proverb
The truth is in the wine. - English proverb
You are as handy as a pocket - English proverb
Everybody likes a good list of quotes