Bar Rules:
#1 - Do not grab a girl's boob who's 20 years older than you when you're trying to get with her friends. Apparently, it's not classy at all. And it makes you look like a 21 year old.
#2 - If a girl invites you anywhere, just go. Unless she's a lesbian and her gay friend was hitting on you all night.
#3 - Don't play rock, paper, scissors with a guy from L.A. named Jake for rounds of Jager bombs...you will lose.
#4 - A good long island iced tea is always worth the price...as long as it's under $12.
#5 - If there's karaoke, always go with 80s hair metal (Motley Crue, Skid Row, etc.) and get the crowd to participate. Act like a rockstar, the ladies love it.
#6 - If you're 21, lie about your age. Avoid conversations about age because she's probably older than you. You're the youngest person in the bar, kiddo.
#7 - If someone wants to buy you a drink, let them. Doesn't matter if they're fat, ugly, or a dude. Free alcohol is a blessing. There are sober kids in Indonesia
#8 - Wing men, always have them. You need someone to distract her fat and/or ugly friend
I will be updating this periodically
I call it "387"
Courtesy of Johnny Ochoa
Everything in this picture was planned by yours truly
Just my artistic and metaphorical side
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