List of places I have traveled, lived, studied, and/or worked: (35 and counting!) Austria, Belgium, Belize, Canada, China, Colombia, Costa Rica, Czech Republic, Denmark, Ecuador, Egypt, England, Germany, Holy See, Hungary, Iceland, India, Ireland, Italy, Lichtenstein, Luxembourg, Mexico, Netherlands, Nicaragua, Peru, Poland, Portugal, Scotland, Singapore, Slovakia, Spain, Thailand, Tunisia, Turkey, Ukraine http://thesurrealist.co.uk/ http://www.playerappreciate.com/pimphandle.asp Enjoys long walks on the beach, pina coladas and being caught in the rain. Also: Beer, cocktails, yoga, reading, live music, rockabilly bands, indie bands, swing and salsa dancing, weird medical shows, shopping,traveling, biking, rollerblading, people-watching, poetry slam, NPR, KEXP, New York Times crossword puzzles, barflies, torturing my friends with bad jokes. But seriously though...bada-boom.
DO NOT ask me to add you if A) I have never met you in person B) You live in Pakistan and want to chat with beautiful babes online.. C) You are selling something (including yourself as a booty call. Gosh!) D)You're trying to generate publicity for your crappy band, E) You're trying to add me to your harem of half-naked webcam "friends" F) You spam every woman on MySpace with the same cheesy lines that are obviously copied and pasted G) You are an 18-year old guy telling me I look good "For my age". WHATEVER. I'm not a MILF cougar or Mrs. Robinson, mo-fos. iF YOU CAN'T BUY YOUR OWN BEER, Fughetaboudit! H) You are a ""foxy sex-positive senior citizen swinger" looking for "playdates" EWWWWWW I) You are more than 10 years older than me. Not looking for a suger daddy or Hugh Hefner J) You are some trailer trash loser from a state that I will never visit, AND have a mullet AND a bad 'stach (it sounds too good to be true, but it's not! I think it's all the buttrock bands I have listed in my profile. It attracts a rare breed) K) You run a Nigerian investment scam (at least kick me down some of the profits!) L) You have a creepy, gross, and/or excessively gory picture that I'll have to look at if I add you as a friend M) You post 20 million times a day with some bad-luck chain letter or some stupid quiz N) You post 20 million times a day about your crappy band's next show (If you're a good band it's ok) O) You don't read these rules and just send me the same spam that is obviously generic "hi sexy", "luv your profile" "wanna chat". People! At least put a personal note in! P) When I ignore your repeated messages with the same inane content, you don't take a hint and just keep re-sending them. Q) You have terrible spelling. Ok, I might frequently type in all lowercase, but at least I can spell. R)I've already deleted you from my friends list because we broke up. S)Your only friend is Tom. T)You are a Republican, a LaRouchian, a Libertarian, a Nader-ite, or a Perot-ite. U)Your picture just shows your naked torso ( or something even more terrifying) and not your face V)You email me saying I'm really frickin' full of myself, when this part of my profile is obviously a joke. A JOKE, people! Geez. W)You haven't bothered to Photoshop your ex-girlfriend's hair and ear out of your photo. X)Every picture on your profile shows you with a bevy of hoochified ladies. Hmmm, just what I always wanted- The Ladies Man! Deuce Bigolo, Male Gigolo! Y)You have no actual photos of yourself, just pictures of places you've been or things you like, leading me to believe you're so hideous you refuse to post a face shot. Z) Every photo is either from 15 years ago (Your hairstyle gives you away!) or is taken from so far away that it's impossible to judge what you really look like.
Hanoi Rocks, Bon Jovi, Winger, Great White, Poison, White Lion, Tesla, Def Leppard, Quiet Riot, Skid Row, Dokken, Lita Ford, Motorhead, Stryper, Twisted Sister, Alice Cooper, Ozzy, Metallica, Iron Maiden, AC/DC, Slaughter, Scorpions,Ratt, Whitesnake, Warrant, Cinderella, Extreme, Vixen, GNR, Velvet Revolver,Aerosmith, Rolling Stones, Nirvana, Mother Love Bone, Radiohead, Devotchka, Gogol Bordello, Wu-Tang Clan, Bob MArley, The Arcade Fire, The Jayhawks, David Bowie, Bauhaus, Peter Murphy, Ministry, Front 242, Depeche Mode, Longwave, Postal Service, Interpol, Snow Patrol, Broken Social Scene, Muse, Jesus and Mary Chain, Elliott Smith, Mogwai, Isis, Opeth, McLusky,THE PIXIES!!! ,David Garza, Neko Case, Metallica, Maiden.. dude!, Motorhead, Social Distortion, Leonard Cohen, Hank Williams Sr., Johnny Cash, Dropkick Murphys, the Pogues, Flogging Molly,The Real MacKenzies, The Briggs, Reverend Horton Heat, the Cramps, The Derailers, Satan's Pilgrims, Wild Wax Combo, rockabilly,psychobilly, alt-country, western swing, 80's hair bands, 80's gothic/ batcave bands, 80's new wave (due to the plethora of one-hit wonders, I can't name them all here), freedom rock dude, karaoke rockstars
Borat, Donnie Darko, Office Space, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure (but skip the Bogus Journey), Brick, Requiem for a Dream, Shaun of the Dead, Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Happy Gilmore, Napoleon Dynamite, Austin Powers, Dot the i, Garden State, Before Sunset, Road Trip, O Brother Where Art Thou,Faster Pussycat Kill Kill,Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown, Office Space, Night of the Living Dead, Evil Dead II, Killer Clowns from Outer Space, Bambi Meets Godzilla. Simpsons movie. I like foreign movies and film festival movies.
Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom. We'll wait quietly here behind the bush while Jim wrestles the giant anaconda. The Simpsons. Ali G., the Sopranos, Carnivale, Criminal Minds, CSI (Las Vegas, Miami, AND New York, beyotches!) Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. My Name Is Earl.
Genome, Dilbert and the Way of the Weasel,Lies and the Lying Liars who Tell Them, Fast Food Nation, Guns, Germs, and Steel, On Love, The Coming Plague, Outbreak, The Piano Tuner, Love in the Time of Cholera, 100 Years of Solitude, East of Eden, Queen of the South, The Unthinkable Thoughts of Jacob Green
RONCO spokesmodels. Salad spinner, representin! Tony Gazelle QVC hosts