alexx.

jumping out on I-30 nor free falling from my deerstand seem reasonable.once i woke up dead, turns out it was just a dream, reality is my nightmare. im not sure if its "yellow" or "chello" but i never say hello. you'd think i was kinned to weezy as much as im called baby but my name is actually alexandria. my mind has a mind of its own. its like 74 people in one shouting here, crying there, laughing quietly, whispering, rampaging, idealizing, it never sleeps, and i can't control it. it does as it pleases, i simply give it a home inside my big head. i run! physically that is, i dont run mentally, i don't know how, i just crawl, try to walk and stumble into arms that just drop me, then i start al over again. i have major o.c.d to the point my thoughts are uncontrollable, it takes over, i hate it. i don't live on this earth permanently, im simply passing through, one day i will break the laws of gravity and fly away. walking into my life is like walking onto a battle field unarmed without realizing it, i dont blame you for running, just don't trip on your way out! music feeds my soul, it inspires me, it quenches my thirst like water at the end of basketball practice. im cursed by my imagination and can't trust. i tried once and failed. happiness with other people is a destination for me. im still travleing this road, it seems to be getting longer and longer as the miles increase, and my patience decrease. im not the way i am by choice, every axpect has an explanation which leaves me looking for an adjective to describe all of the instabilities that make me who i am. the search goes on and on, but for what, soon i will be history. the goal is to be remembered forever. catastrophic historical genious.
1peter 4:12-19"dont be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ahsamed, but praise God that you bear that name."
isaiah 40:7-8"all men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field. the grass withers and the flowers fall, because the breath of the lord blows on them. surely the people are grass. but the word of our god stands forever."sunshine layouts.