I'd like to meet:
Genuine people with character, optimism, and maybe even a few nervous ticks. But not online, for Christ sakes... and for that matter, not in person either... I'd rather be alone. ;-)As for real life people: Charlotte Gainsbourg, despite her marginal musical talent; anyone who has successfully shot out the lights in the letter G of the sign at Black Angus; anyone who can beat level 19 of old school Tetris while eating Cheetos and toothscraping the orange powdery paste off their fingers; anyone who can hook me up with a baby crow so's I can raise it and train it to peck out the eyes of the motherfuckers who eat fast food and drink Budweisers in my patio late at night, then bring the bags so I can search for bagglers; a real estate agent WITHOUT horns and a barbed tail; a swimming instructor who doesn't have the piss-detecting dye in his pool; the guy who left blood all over my sister's car; Jason was on this list but we got it handled yo... but Rachel Howard is still MIA, after dropping all connections to modern technology and moving to a third world metropolis in mexico. Oh, what a shame. But I crush a lot. So ehh...
Music:
Radiohead, Modest Mouse, The Shins, Jeff Buckley, Muse, Blonde Redhead, PJ Harvey, Beck, The Jade Shader, Pinback, 3MP, Boilermaker, Eels, The Flaming Lips, Nellie McKay, Pink Floyd, The Doors, Ben Gibbard's stuff, REM, Black
Movies:
PAN'S LABYRINTH!!!, The Science of Sleep, Little Miss Sunshine, Borat, Amelie, Me & You and Everyone We Know, Star Wars Episode IV-VII, Les Miserables, Indiana Jones, Goonies, Chris Farley stuff, John Candy stuff, Amores Perros, 40 year-old Virgin, Monty Python stuff , and everything else I've actually paid for and watched twice.
Television:
...is the anti-christ. And it's a portal allowing "MTV" to raise the meek, which, I might add, blows the doors wide open for shit to laugh about. Family Guy, South Park, Colbert/Stewart/Spade/Silverman are the only reasons I haven't gone to Big 5 for a pump action 12 gauge to blow a hole right through the cable service box across the street.
Books:
...are a sure-fire sleep aid. Especially when they suck.But: I'll admit John Steinbeck is worth digging into, and American Psycho was a cannibal's dessert menu. Nice. Ahh... can't forget the Indian in the Cupboard series. Way fun when you're 10 and doped up on Doritos and Pepsi.
Heroes:
Definitely not Tony, 'cause that Jetta crushed my leg and all he could do was stare and wonder if he could stop the car with his bare hands.Ahh! I remember. My cousin, for using a 2 liter of soda to extinguish the flames under the hood of a Lincoln TownCar with a trunk full of fireworks. That was some quick thinking.