Damo! - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Here's the thing. Did you know that peanuts are one of the ingredients found in dynamite? True story. Look into it if you don't believe me. The point being that my poop has more in common with explosives than I thought ( get it, because peanuts are also one of the ingredients that can be found in my shit)! Also I used to drink bourbon sometimes, but then I found out that it was made the "Official drink of the United States of America" by congress and I dunno if I'm up for being that patriotic man. Speaking of drinking, you know that old saying " wet your whistle"? Yeah well in Old England at the taverns and inns there were actually whistles baked into the handles of mugs, so that patrons could get the bartender's attention so he'd fill them up...thus "wetting their whistle". Geez. Also did you know that most elephants weigh less than the tongue of a blue whale!? Excited yet? There's one more thing I have in common with elephants (wrinkly gray skin and a dimply trunk are also shared traits)! Ever collect beer coasters? Then there is something we have in common. The hobby of collecting beer coasters is known as tegestology, and I have been known to dabble! I am such an asshole. PS- any month that starts on a Sunday will have a Friday the 13th. Do the math.

My Interests

Everything bordering nothing.

I'd like to meet:

Anyone not on myspace.People who make music. Massage therapists.Inventors.

Music:

Songs.

Movies:

home videos of me getting yelled at.

Television:

UCB.

Books:

= awesome.

My Blog

My computer thinks I’m asian...again.

For Christ's sake... thats sake as in your or my sake not as in sah-kee the hot rice wine you get at a Japanese restaurant, but you see how I am now screwed because my computer is going to see this a...
Posted by Damo! on Sat, 10 Nov 2007 10:20:00 PST

Fucking subject.

Ahem.New list / Super List/ Ridcu-list / 173 Part A1. Zoobilee Zoo. Thoughts? Lets talk sometime.2. Zoo pals... thats right. Paper plates made too look like animals heads. So now your child can eat ba...
Posted by Damo! on Fri, 12 Oct 2007 07:51:00 PST

Pontifittycazations! werd.

Yay I have the internet again! I know how exciting this is for all of you. All three of you. At this point I figure if people haven't gotten in on this party it's really their loss (one juicy rational...
Posted by Damo! on Thu, 11 Oct 2007 10:32:00 PST

New List!

Top Ten most Disconcerting commercial lines I have ever heard :10. "So he still has genital herpes... and I, still don't." (wow I'm totally sold! But I still think they should've gone with my idea, a...
Posted by Damo! on Fri, 01 Jun 2007 01:13:00 PST

Your puss called, it wants it's puss back...

Now that I almost, kinda, might, possibly, maybe have your divided if anything attention I'm going to take a moment to vent profusely about the sheer rage I am feeling over having my wallet stolen to ...
Posted by Damo! on Fri, 23 Mar 2007 11:13:00 PST

Happy New New...

This year I had decided to make no resolutions in hopes that I would avoid the self loathing that comes along with giving up on them altogether by mid February. It didn't work. I got drunk and ended u...
Posted by Damo! on Sat, 06 Jan 2007 01:13:00 PST

Been a while...

Hey everybody! Did you miss me? Yeah, well. (To my adoring fans, it's completely understandable.) Anyway here's some food for thought...the usual array of bullshit:1.You came out of a twat. You're not...
Posted by Damo! on Fri, 15 Sep 2006 10:04:00 PST

I am cool.

I have a couple "live action friends" ( as in not myspace "friends") now so I haven't really blogged in a minute. Thats not even true. I just want it to seem like it is. Anyway I got a bunch of e-mail...
Posted by Damo! on Thu, 24 Aug 2006 01:08:00 PST

none

I changed my name to Whorebot on here because I thought it would be funny to sign on and have it say " Hello, Whorebot!". You know what? I have never been more right in my life...except for that one ...
Posted by Damo! on Wed, 28 Jun 2006 09:02:00 PST

shoot me...

The two year old I take care of just asked me about the baby inside my tummy. As you may have guessed, I am not pregnant. Just thought I'd write one more blog before I am so weak from starvation and l...
Posted by Damo! on Wed, 28 Jun 2006 07:00:00 PST