My name is Max. I'm the Lehman family's dog. Josh is pretty much the best owner ever, which fits well, because I'm the best dog ever.What, you haven't heard? Let me tell you a bit about myself!My tears cure cancer. But I never cry. Ever. If I jump in a pool, I don't get wet, the water gets Max'd. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of species I allow to live. I have three speeds: Walk, run, and kill. I can win Connect Four in 3 moves. I don't sleep, I wait. I can speak braille. I never hide, I only seek. If you've lost your virginity, I have it. If you haven't, your mistaken.Strangly, I only have one hand-- The upper hand. I have counted to infinity, twice. My computer is specially made for me without a "ctrl" button, because I'm always in control anyways. I don't read books, I stare at them until I get the information I want.While leading sanatizers claim to kill 99.9% of germs, I can kill 100% of whatever the fuck I want. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, I live in Oregon.One day I got an erection-- It struck oil. I put the "laughter" in "manslaughter". I once got in touch with my feminine side, and promptly got it pregnant. I AM allowed to talk about Fight Club. I reguarly win the game Simon Says against Simon. Jeeves asks me questions.I always have the right of way. Always.
I edited my profile with Thomas’ Myspace Editor V3.6 !
