About Me
I have in my time been a purveyor of magazines and stationary, a toilet cleaner, a manual labourer, a technical assistant, a bingo caller, an usher, an actor, a marketing designer, a gallery curator, an exhibition co-ordinator, a parliamentary interviewer, a television news interviewee, an ambassador, a ‘bright spark’ (1992), an illustrator, a lover, a passenger, a navigator, a removals man, a defender, a landscape gardener, a pianist, a singer, a stage manager, a twin, a father, a director, a husband, a thief, a receptionist, a barman, a waiter, a loser, a manager, a counsellor, a governor, an instigator, a follower, a president, a shelf-stacker, a child-carer, a babysitter, a supporter, an adversary, an entertainer, a recluse, a novelty, and now I’m a cover supervisor and drama teacher.
Tough day at the office? Worn out from pushing sacks of meat around all day? Go ahead; poke that bloated sack of stupidity in his fat useless gut...
...and go find yourself a TV show to watch and unwind with. I'm so good to you.
You see that map thingy up there? I clicked that open one day, curious to see who
was looking at me and from whence they lookethed and I saw a 'recent' flag in south
wales. Now I spent several years in Mid Wales and I amuse myself with the notion
that I still have friends there, so I switched to satellite view and started zooming in
to see if I recognised the locale of my patron. I zoomed and I zoomed, quickly
realising I was homing in on Swansea. This encouraged me because I know that I
know people in Swansea. So I continued zooming in on the 'recent' flag.
I got to within a 10 metre resolution and do you know where that flag was?
In a tree.
In a tree in a suburban neighbourhood in Swansea.
Im getting hits from squirrels.
Do I feel good about that or not? Lines are open now...
I made this to scare away the boredom:
If you've never watched The Prisoner then you're stupid and selfish. Luckily for you, I am clever and generous, so here; consider yourself introduced, like you was at a party or sumfin
This is going to kick all kinds of arse...
If I cut off their heads and sewed them together at the neck, would that make me a terrorist or a freedom fighter?
If Superman's physical density is so great that his eyeball can reduce a speeding bullet to squashy useless metal...
...how the hell does Superman shave?!?
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My good friend and hero, The Steve Kelly. Watch this if you value greatness:
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Layout by CoolChaser Background from flickr user
