Annie profile picture

Annie

About Me

Annie1: i hate profiles


Annie2: this isn't a profile, it's an interview, interviews are rad
Annie1: not really
Annie2: dude, don't suck in this interview because then people will read it and be like oh she sucks
Annie1: so that means you suck
Annie2: right so you have to be not sucking
Annie1: i can't promise anything, you are kind of annoying me right now
Annie2: so what do you do?
Annie1: i am a writer
Annie2: oh that is pretty cool
Annie1: yeah i guess so but everytime anyone says they are a writer people are like oh so you are unemployed
Annie2: but we have a book coming out
Annie1: yeah it's called HAPPY BIRTHDAY OR WHATEVER
Annie2: why are you yelling at me
Annie1: i'm not yelling that is how people write book titles
Annie2: no they don't, they underline it or put it in italics or something
Annie1: i don't know how to italicize on the interweb
Annie2: are you stupid or something?
Annie1: dude, are you sucking? because we agreed not to suck because it makes me look bad
Annie2: anyway back to the book, when does it come out?
Annie1: April of 2007
Annie2: who's the publisher?
Annie1: HarperCollins
Annie2: oo that is fancy HarperCollins is like a real publisher, as in they publish real people
Annie1: i am a real person
Annie2: you know what i mean, it's not like you printed it out on your inkjet and then stapled all the pages together and called it a book
Annie1: right...ok so is that it?
Annie2: alright, i think that's enough
Annie1: ok fine then, it's the end. everyone go home
Annie2: no one's reading this
Annie1: good point, now we can talk shit about everyone
Annie2: hahaha
Annie1: dude are you laughing at your own joke?
Annie2: totally

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Giovanni Lombardo Radice, Umberto Lenzi, Lucio Fulci, Ruggero Deodato, David Hess, and anyone else who have had experiences with the undead, Gilbert Sorrentino, Amy Sedaris, Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart, dick in a box

My Blog

Barnes & Noble Santa Monica!

Dudes. I love L.A. (we love it).I will be reading at Barnes & Noble in Santa Monica on the 3rd Street Promenade on April 19 at 7:30 PM. You can meet my mother. That will pretty much blow your moth...
Posted by on Tue, 30 Jan 2007 07:09:00 GMT

New Date for Boston!

Attention Boston Area heads!I'm reading at Barnes and Noble at Boston University, oh snap! On May 3! That's 5/3. At 7 pm.660 Beacon Street Boston, MA.. The night will be magical. As in full of magic...
Posted by on Fri, 19 Jan 2007 12:22:00 GMT

Book Tour

Save the dates or else you will MISS OUT on what critics are predicting will be the biggest event in the history of everything that does not suck.April 10, 2007 - Barnes &Noble -  Astor Place...
Posted by on Thu, 14 Dec 2006 11:08:00 GMT

A hippo weighs more than 2 cars.

I am in Los Angeles right now. L.A. is totally on fire! And I don't mean that as in "L.A. is totally rad" I mean that as in L.A. is totally on fire. I can see flames from my parents' house in Westlake...
Posted by on Sun, 09 Jul 2006 01:19:00 GMT