my name is chloe. i am a weimaraner. i will be 10 years old this spring, which is 70 in human years. i am highly intelligent, but my mommy says i am just a whiny bitch. i like to stomp at my mommy. even though she loves me very much and lets me get away with murder, she would not set up a dogster page for me. she said dogster is gay. i think meatspace is pretty gay, but i try to be a good girl for my mommy so i won't whine about it too much. oh, who am i kidding? i like to be a naughty bitch. tearing apart the house is so much fun. i desperately need a bath because i am very stinky. my mommy says i smell like fritos and rancid bacon. that sounds pretty yummy to me. i have smelly farts, too. sometimes i accidently give my mommy dutch ovens when she is asleep. i like to poop. i have a step-sister, lorelei. she is a kitty cat. she is pure demon-spawn even though she is so cute and white and fluffy. she lets me snuggle with her when it's cold. i like to snuggle with her... but i like to snuggle with my mommy more. i like to lick my mommy's toes & chew on her underwear. i have many nick-names, but the one i get called the most is 'shit-lips' because i like to eat lorelei's turds. they are very tasty. the poop gets stuck in my gums and gives me bad breath, but those turds are really, really tasty. my other nick-name is bunny because i have big, floppy ears that feel like velveteen lamb chops. my mommy went on vacation one time and didn't take me. she missed my birthday and i was very sad. i ran away from the kennel and tried to find her. i was gone for 3 days and i had alot of fun. a nice ny state trooper found me and gave me his sammich. it was yummy, but not as yummy as turds. my mommy was sad that she left me alone and now i get to eat a whole birthday cake every year. that is yummy, too... but i still like turds the best. i like to chase lorelei all day long. when i am not doing that or stompin', i am sleeping because my mommy taught me to be lazy. i love being lazy as much as i love eating cat turds. woof.
I edited my profile with my mommy's help !
