How To Get Out Of A Speeding Ticket-A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:Officer: May I see your driver's license?Driver: I don't have one. It was revoked when I got my 5th DUI.Officer: May I see the registration for this vehicle?Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.Officer: The car is stolen?Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the registration in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?Driver: Yes, sir.Hearing this, the officer immediately called his Captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the Captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:Captain: Sir, can I see your license?Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.Captain: Whose car is this?Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration. The driver owned the car.Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body.Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!-I edited my profile at MsPremade.com . check out these Myspace Layouts!
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Name: Nicolas matthew munch
Birthdate: id rather not be sexually harrassed by some creepy 40 year old man
Birthplace: tulsa
Current Location: tulsa ok but planning on moving to frisco texas
Eye Color: sea foam green
Hair Color: sandy blonde
Height: 7'9" with stilts but 6'2" barefoot
Weight: 150 give or take a few L Bs
Piercings: nopsees
Tatoos: no but i would fancy a python wraped aroung my right arm
Boyfriend/Girlfriend: we'll just brush that one under the rug
Overused Phraze: "sorry i'm taken"
FAVORITES
Food: carrot sticks with a ranch dipping sauce
Candy: snickers
Number: 1 and 9/15ths
Color: baby blew
Animal: Big Dogs
Drink: h2o
Alcohol Drink: i dont drink
Bagel: blueberry muffin
Letter: 14
Body Part on Opposite sex: i like it all
This or That
Pepsi or Coke: they both are poisonous to me
McDonalds or BurgerKing: they will both ultimatley lead to my death
Strawberry or Watermelon: strawberry with a luscios sugar coating
Hot tea or Ice tea: piping hot tea not really i like iced better i just like the word piping
Chocolate or Vanilla chocolate
Hot Chocolate or Coffee: hot chocolatte
Kiss or Hug: i prefer high fives
Dog or Cat: i eat them both but im partial to cat meat
Rap or Punk: Rap bee...hatch
Summer or Winter:
Scary Movies or Funny Movies: a good comedy will do
Love or Money: money...im shallow
YOUR...
Bedtime: 8:15 on the dot. any later and i get swats
Most Missed Memory: Being a skater im bringing it back though
Best phyiscal feature: ive been complemented on my heart
First Thought Waking Up: only eleven hours and fifteen minuted till bedtime
Goal for this year: shoot even par
Best Friends: Brock Kelton matt roman laci amy katie
Weakness: i have too big of a heart
Fears: what weakness
&..39;Heritage:' german
Longest relationship: thirteen minutes
HAVE YOU...
Ever Smoked: i smoked some homies on a driveby, does that count
Pot: a kichen utensil used for cooking
Ever been Drunk: i thought i was wasted once but it turns out i just stood up too fast
Ever been beaten up: ya but she was a really big girl
Ever beaten someone up: all the time (in my dreams)
Ever Shoplifted: i don't even think it's possible to lift a whole shop
Ever Skinny Dipped: in the bath tub
Ever Kissed Opposite sex: ya
Been Dumped Lately: I wish that means i would have had something
IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite Eye Color: teh color of the sky
Favorite Hair Color: blonde and brunette
Short or Long: exactly what are you asking
Height: shorter than me which shouldn't be too hard
Style: White please
Looks or Personality: personalities are cool
Hot or Cute hott
Drugs and Alcohol: are bad for you
Muscular or Really Skinny: smaller than me so ya really skinny
RANDOMS
Number of Regrets in the Past: 1, takin this frekin long surver
What country do you want to Visit: scotland to golf
How do you want to Die: traped under a gas tank thats the worst
Been to the Mall Lately: ya
Do you like Thunderstorms: I love them
Get along with your Parents: my moms a nice woman
Health Freak: somewhat
Do you think your Attractive: who knows
Believe in Yourself: thanks for the encouragement
Want to go to College: wheres that at?
Do you Smoke: like i said only homies on drivebys
Do you Drink: virgins only
Shower Daily: ya ill take that into consideration
Been in Love: until she was smoked in a driveby
Do you Sing: my mom thinks im good
Want to get Married: it would never work out i barely know you
Do you want Children: yes many nic jr.s running around
Have your future kids names planned out: no
Age you wanna lose your Virginity: I don't think thats gonna happen im pretty good at keeping track of things
Hate anyone: i share my love with the whole world
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