Who am I?
I am nobody really. I’ve never done anything famous, I’ve never done anything really noteworthy enough to make the local newspaper. I don’t know anyone famous and have never even met anyone famous. I’ve never donated a kidney or any other body organ to anyone famous. So, I’m really nobody. I know that sounds just like what you’re looking for! As a matter of fact, if People Magazine were to do an article on my life, they would quickly be sucked into the black hole of my infinite lack of notoriety and bankrupt themselves. What are my hobbies? Well, I like golf….well….actually…..â€like†is actually not the right word, it’s sort of misleading so I think it actually counts as a lie. No, I love…..well…..that’s still an understatement. Here in a single paragraph I’ve lied twice! I can’t imagine any woman who, in their right mind, would EVER want to get in contact with me after seeing me lie twice in a single paragraph. I greatly apologize and will try to do better from here on out. I’m addicted (yeah….that’s the right word) to golf. Passionate, love the game.WARNING!!!!! Most women say in their profiles they are looking for a man with a great sense of humor, well, I have one of those. So, you may find me cute, adorable, witty, and funny (and did I mention the singing?) but I somehow find it difficult, even given the above to all be true (which it is not so there’s my 3rd lie) that you could fall in love with me that quickly. So, just be warned! I can be downright charming and am a southern gentleman! So, there is a risk that you’re going to fall head-over-heals in love with me very rapidly and I’m giving you fair warning up front (so don’t get mad at me later) that I’m looking at making friends right now.
but...to be fair...if you are SMOKING HOT!!!! I might fall in love sooner...please...only those who really are smoking hot apply for said position.