Frank

I'd like to meet:

ANNE HATHAWAY.....AND STEVE CARELL TOO1.Ever kissed a blonde haired, blue eyed person?Yeah I make out with Nazi chicks all the time..............2. Can you see a phone right now?yeah sure.................3. What are you listening to?me practicing my Christopher Walken impression.............4. Where is it coming from?I believe it started in the diaphragm, made its way up the vocal chords and came out my mouth..................5. Last thing you ate?A steak.................6. What was the last thing you saw on TV?I'm not exactly sure but it involved a tuba and a sorority girl.............................7. Who was the last person other than family you saw?the guy who just kidnapped my family.....................8. Are labels/stereotypes good?no. and only a canadian would ask a question like that. I bet youre a canadian right. ......................9. Last alcoholic beverage you tasted?im sorry about the previous canadian thing. It was all in the name of comedy eh?.........................10. Song stuck in your head?the funky beat that plays in the background of my porn videos ............................11. Acoustic or electric guitars?xylophones....................................12. Do you dance while getting ready for whatever?yeah ive been known to bust a move here or there...................13. What are you wearing?Whatever you want me to be wearing sweetie...................14. What is the greatest number of people you've been in front of?a lot. Not for long though. My enormous eyebrows frighten them away. ...................................15. Have you ever gone skinny dipping?I'm not sure skinny is the proper adjective...................16. Have you ever taken a shower while you were drunk or high?no. by the time I wake up, figure out where the hell I am and hitchhike back to my house im usually sobered up.............17. Do you like techno?no. and techno knows what it did. ......................18. Have you ever been to a night club?I've been in a comedy club at night. .......................20. Have you ever made out on a plane?No. the motherfuckin snakes cockblocked me....................21. Do you have leadership skills?no. I pretty much threw those away when I got my name printed on my hat..........................22. Can you play an instrument?Cowbell?..........................23. Have you ever sat on a roof and looked at stars?Yeah. But now my kitchen floor gets wet when it rains.....................24. Ever done that while talking on the phone to a boyfriend or girlfriend?Nah. If im talking on the phone to a girlfriend I usually need to be near a credit card....................25. Does the song Stairway To Heaven make you sad?yes. If by sad you mean sexually aroused.................26. Do you have any instruments in your room?not musical ones...........................28. Are you currently pregnant/have you recently gotten someone pregnant?yeah. i guess Nickelodeon's gotta find a new kid for that Zoey show...............................30. What scent are you wearing right now?greasy French fry that I just ate. By loreal......................31. Are there any animals around you at the moment? . nah..............................32. Drinking anything at the moment?Fred Funk's ¾ iced tea and ¼ lemonade. That bastard Arnold palmer totally ripped it off............................33. Ever thought you were going to get married?sure I do. But its not up to me..............................34. Last person you told you loved?the foldout picture of Ms. November..............................35. Last person who told you they loved you?me in a high pitched voice pretending to be Ms. November............................36. Favorite time of day?pretzel time...................................37. Favorite video game?ms. Pacman. Cause she's sexy..................................38. Favorite food?Pretty much food in general.................................39. Do you like spiders?no. theyre even worse than techno...........................40. Cat person or dog person?just a normal human. If you know any cat people, you should try convincing them to fight crime or something...........................41. Got a job?i set up a lemonade stand sometimes................................42. First love?that cable movie with the pizza guy and the hungry models that i accidentaly stumbled upon when i was looking for the Ninja Turtles..............................43. Tan or pale skin?tan is nice...................................44. You're deserted on an island, what do you have with you?well I see it happening like this. My plane crashes and there are only two other survivors. Jessica Alba and Morgan Freeman. Me and Jessica make out while Morgan calls for his private jet to rescue us. Then we all go party at Senor Frogs. ...............................45. Favorite lyrics?I am the eggman. They are the eggman. I am the walrus. Goo Goo G'joob. ..................................46. Biggest regret?Using my mom's credit card to order that blow-up doll. I guess I can blame it on my sister...........................47. Did you have a New Years kiss?Nah. I had a New Years Twizzler............................48. What do you want the most?what the hell do you think................................49. Do you want children?yeah. I need someone to carry on my legacy..........................50. Are you a lover or a fighter?Niether. I'm Frank.

Music:

I recently discovered that I'm a big Parrothead. That's a Jimmy Buffett fan for you uncool folk. I also like Meatloaf and Queen ..

Movies:

The 40 Year Old Virgin, Clerks 2, Jackass, Jackass 2, Austin Powers, Rat Race, This is Spinal Tap, Scary Movie Series, Talledega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, Mallrats, Young Frankenstein, Blazing Saddles, Spaceballs, History of the World Pt. 1, Robin Hood:Men in Tights, Super Troopers, Waiting, Dodgeball, The Aristocrats, Blue Collar Comedy Tour 1,2,& 3, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Monty Python's Meaning of Life, Monty Python's Life of Brian, Jerry Seinfeld's Comedian, Wayne's World, The Blues Brothers, A Night at the Roxbury, Anchorman, Animal House, Airplane, Old School, Wedding Crashers, Caddyshack, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Dogma, Clerks, Tommy Boy, Back to the Future, Napoleon Dynamite, Meet the Parents, Meet the Fockers, Zoolander, Starsky and Hutch, Snakes on a Plane, The Deer Hunter, Pulp Fiction, Jaws, Apocalypse Now, Silence of the Lambs, Indiana Jones, Cruel Intentions, Scarface, The Godfather, Goodfellas, The Exorsist, Nightmare on Elm Street, Child's Play, Scent of a Woman, Field of Dreams, One Flew Over the Cukoos Nest, The Shining, Fight Club, Walk the Line, Good Will Hunting, Saw, Saw II, Forrest Gump, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, Glengarry Glen Ross, The Usual Suspects, Sleepy Hollow, The Fugitive, The Untouchables, The Ring, Land of the Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Rest Stop, The Dead Zone, King of New York, The Great Escape, A Few Good Men, Invincible, 007: Casino Royale, Rocky 4, Rocky Balboa, Sin City, Swingers, City Slickers, City Slickers 2: The Legend of Curly's Gold, Farce of the Penguins, Taxi Driver, The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, Poolhall Junkies, The Departed, Suicide Kings, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrells, Platoon, Borat, The Prestige, Dirty Harry, 300, Swordfish, M*A*S*H, Jerry McGuire, Joe Dirt, Ocean's 11, Ocean's 12, Hotel Rwanda, Unbreakable, Armageddon, Blades of Glory, Chinatown, Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny, Cape Fear, Naked Gun, Disturbia, Grilled, Casino Royale(1962), Seven, Million Dollar Baby, The Sandlot, The Mask, Liar Liar, Batman, Batman Returns, Batman Forever, Batman Begins, Spiderman, Spiderman 2, Spiderman 3, Die Hard with a Vengance, Rat Race, Weekend at Bernie's, Happy Feet, Signs, Mothman Prophecies, 50 First Dates, Easy Rider, Me Myself and Irene, Philadelphia, Pirates of the Carribbean:Curse of the Black Pearl, Pirates of the Carribbean:Dead Man's Chest, Pirates of the Carribbean:At World's End, Ocean's 13, Shawshank Redemption, Throw Momma From The Train, Knocked Up, Midnight Cowboy, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Vertigo, North by Northwest, Transformers, Live Free or Die Hard, Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix, Rear Window, 007 Goldfinger, Streetcar Named Desire, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, Rush Hour 3, King Kong, Hot Fuzz, The Sting, Superbad, Space Cowboys, Halloween, Balls of Fury, Accepted, Beerfest, Green Mile, Terminator, Some Like It Hot, Vacancy, Good Luck Chuck, The Graduate, Independence Day, Hollywoodland, Papillon, Johnny Stacchino, Mystic River, Domestic Disturbance, Alien, Mr. Brooks, Rescue Dawn, American Graffitti, I Am Legend, Play Misty For Me, Face/Off, Saving Private Ryan, Magnificent Seven, The Bridge on the River Kwai, National Treasure: Book of Secrets, The Quiet Man, 12 Angry Men, Untraceable, The Jerk, The Maltese Falcon, E.T., Kelly's Heroes, Gone Baby Gone, American Gangster, No Country for Old Men, There Will Be Blood, High Noon, Schindler's List, 10,000 BC, Tootsie, Vantage Point, The Mist, Shaft, 12 Monkeys, Gangs of New York, 88 Minutes, 21, On the Waterfront, Major League, Major League 2, The Perfect Storm, Walk Hard:The Dewey Cox Story, Baby Mamma, Ben-Hur ..

Television:

Seinfeld, Curb Your Enthusiasm, 30 Rock Scrubs, My Name is Earl, The Office, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, Lost, Two and a Half Men, The Colbert Report, Comedy Central Presents ..

Books:

Rickles' Book, Steve Martin: Born Standing Up, Rodney Dangerfield: It Ain't Easy Bein' Me, Jim Norton's Happy Endings, ..

Heroes:

Robert Kelly, Rodney Dangerfield, Christopher Walken, Jerry Seinfeld, Steve Carell, Don Rickles, Jack Nicholson, Jack Lemmon, Morgan Freeman, Larry David, Jim Norton, Louis CK, Bob Saget, Patton Oswalt and of course, Shaft. ..