About Me
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About me:
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Thanks for visiting my page... as you may or may not know, my name's Matt. I was born in Southmead, i grew up in Chipping Sodbury and i now live in Yate... (yeah... haven't moved much lol)
Well, at the moment, my life is a mix of work (as a Building Surveyor), college (ONC Construction Studies) and my girlfriend, Jasmin - i'll tell you a bit about her in a mo.
What to say about me? Hmm.. well, i love three types of music mainly - METAL, COUNTRY and PUNK. Metal is my foremost interest musically. I discovered it a while ago (infact... a LONG time ago, now) and it has got me through a lot of shit and cheered me up when i needed cheering up (as well as bringing me back down to earth when that was neccesary).
A lot of people laugh when i tell them i like Country music. Especially the ones that actually know me. This is probably because i am known as the guy that dresses metal, listens to metal and lives metal. However, i have a softer side, as does every guy not too up-their-own-ass to admit it. That softer side is put into physical form via country music. It is my mellow outpost, i guess, and it just allows me to get away from the anger and frustration of life, which has a tendency to be rather crappy sometimes.
Also, i mentioned punk rock. This is how i first got into rock music. My mum gave me a list of CDs she could buy from a friend in work and i looked through them. This was at a time where i was in desperate need of change in my life, so i was looking for something different to the music i was regularly listening to at the time. A band i'd only ever heard of once jumped out at me immediately - Bowling For Soup. I though to myself "oh, they're meant to be quite heavy rock - i'll get that one!". Little did i know about 'heavy rock' at the time, but i bought the album and fell in love with the music. From there i moved onto such punk as Sum 41, Blink 182 etc, etc. Sounds sad, but i'm grateful to these band for getting me away from my old music loves, which consisted of bands like Blue and Westlife. Laugh all you want - trust me, i'm laughing now, remembering that i used to LIKE them bands... ha-ha!
Talking about laughing, that is what i do most in life. I used to be a goth - very pessimistic and very negative about a lot of things in life. However, since leaving school i have had a complete turn-around of my attitude towards life. I am now a lot more optimistic, i dress more colourfully and i laugh so much that my face is often aching.
However, like all people, i do have my downfalls. One of which, and the most prominent of them all, is that i swear too much - WAY too fucking much :-P I try to stop, or even just swear less, but it just never seems to work. So, i just am who i am and say what i say. I have come to the conclusion that if you don't like it... get the HELL used to it :-)
Anything else i can say about myself? ... umm... uhhh... ooh, i am a vocalist (as you can tell by my screen name). I do metal vocals mainly, and sometimes a bit of punk and country, but not much. I would like to join a band, so if anyone's interested (if anyone has even read this far...) then give me a shout :-)
I'm also an author. I write horror fiction novels. I am currently writing one, which i had previously entitled "The Devil's Wish", but i now realise that name sucks, and is HUGELY generic, so i'm trying to think of a new name. I refuse to publish my writing to the net, under the good advice of my idol - Richard Laymon (read his books... read them... READ THEM!!). However, if you happen to randomly be a publisher, just send me a message and i'll drop you a sample by email, if you wish.
The 3 things i don't do, and never will do are drinking alcohol, smoking and taking drugs. I don't need them. Yes, life is shit sometimes, but I just sulk for an hour or so, find something better to do, then get on with it. I honestly see absolutely no way that getting high or drinking yourself silly could ever lead to contentment. I've been slightly drunk once and hated it, so i don't need to do it again. I've never smoked a cigarette, because i believe that they are quite vile, and i have never, ever injected, sniffed, or absorbed fuck all. I don't need to. I get all the good feelings from my girlfriend :-)
My circle of friends consists of exactly 4 people. These are the people that can turn my day from a shit day into the best day of my life. I love them all more than they know, but that's me - i love. Hate is something i no longer do. I've done it a lot before, but i don't need it anymore, either.
Something you will learn about me, if you get close to me, is that i give a shit. Most people in this world don't, but i do. I care about the world, animals, human rights, government, how much the world has changed in the past 50 years or so, how shit food is these days, how thick the air feels when you are breathing when walking down a main road, single mothers, underpaid workers, overpaid 'workers', assholes, my mum, my grandmother, problems that people i hardly know are having, and probably many other things. Things that don't particularly affect me personally, but affect how the world goes 'round. This world needs a little love, and i don't see enough of it at the moment. The film "Love Actually" pinpointed love in an airport arrivals room, but how long does that little bit of love take to turn into an arguing couple? A crying baby? A neglected grandparent? I'm one of the army of people (of whom there are not many, genuinely) that is out to change how this world works. I want change, and i will get it. Full stop.
I am one of those types that has VERY strong opinions. The thing is, though, is that i am not afraid to voice them. Ask my close friends, often i say something so controversial that they will just stop and stare at me. I don't care, though, because if that is what i think, than i'm just going to go ahead and think that.
My sense of humour is probably more morbid than most. Infact, it's more morbid than most people can handle. Especially people that aren't used to me. So, if you aren't prepared, don't bring something up, because i'll probably make some sort of joke about it, no matter how controversial that is. Well, i do have the intelligence enough to realise when making a joke about something is disrespectful - that is when i won't do it.
Anyway, i promiced a bit about Jasmin, so here goes. First of all, i would just like to say that if you are a guy, she is a better girlfriend than you have... if you are a girl... she is a better girlfriend than you will ever be. full stop! Nothing means more to me than this girl and no matter how long i go on for i could never even attempt to put into words how much she means to me and how much i love her. She is my life, my world, my light, my saviour and my everything. I mean, she may as well just be Jesus with boobs (haha) because she has come down and saved my life in so many ways. I can't find the words to explain how badly i miss her when our hands are not holding on to each other's...how much i long for her when we are apart... even if just for a few hours, i miss her like crazy. She is kind, caring, respectful, honest, trusting and so, so beautiful it really is unbelievable! she really is the BEST girlfriend possible and i am more than grateful to have her. Jasmin... I LOVE YOU more than words can ever say and that love will never die, i promice
Well, i think that just about sums me up... So, before you fall asleep, i shall now go and... do... stuff. :-)
Matthew Gardiner - AUTHOR • VOCALIST • WIERDO (or unusual-o to Jasmin)
xxxTHIS NEEDS TO BE STOPPED!!..
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