We always hear those "50 rules for guys" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are guys rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! btw...i did not conceive ALL these...to the man who started this idea...you should go down in history1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 2. If we pee on the seat that's laziness, but... If you sit on a wet toilet seat, that's stupidity. 3. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 4. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her. 5. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot. 6. Your brother is an idiot, and your Dad probably is too (watch out with this one). 7. Telling us that that girl is a hoe or dresses like a slut makes you look jealous and petty, and it's certainly not going to deter us from looking. 8. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you. 9. NO your best friend is NOT better looking than that hot chick i saw earlier. 10. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 11. Crying is blackmail. 12. Don't hate on CUNT, you call us dicks. 13. Anyone can buy condoms. 14. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 15. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 16. A guy who cries is a single guy. 17. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. Get a new girl. 18. By holding out, you win almost every time. 19. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys. 20. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again! 21. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy and deceit is what your girlfriends are for. 22.Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. 23. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 24. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat. 25. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 26. We DO NOT secretly hate our best friend. 27. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 28. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it. 29. We DO NOT forget or leave our bro's for girlfriends. 30. If we hear from an old girlfriend, we briefly fantasize about making out with her. But do not worry; the fantasy includes you AND her, together.