The O2 Arena, Wembley Stadium, and The Albert Hall – just three of the places I visited on an open-top bus tour of London and thought ‘Oooh I’d like to sing my songs there’.
My name is Luigi Masi and I am not like many other singer/songwriters – I write my own press releases. I also do pop. And we’re talking good pop now. Some have said I’m the best thing since slice bread but in all fairness, a cheese sandwich on thick cut, white with no crusts does really hit the spot. Whether there’s a hint of rock, electro or R&B, it always comes back to pop. And that’s a good start.
Seventeen years in the making, I’ve already outlasted Furby’s, Day-Glo shell suits and Sonia. It was at age 10 that I discovered my singing voice, while cleaning under my bed - it was hidden behind a box of Transformers. I knew I couldn’t keep it a secret and the world had to know. So I did what any potential superstar did – I became a waiter.
After years and years of serving record executives pretentiously small food for similarly small tips, I wanted to be the one looking down on other people like peasants so made the big push into the humungous world of pop. I was signed up to Bunx Records a few years back to make the tea. It was a step backwards, but I hoped it would be a means to an end.
For months, I wailed my little heart out around the corridors of Bunx Records. Day after day, I was referred to as Larry, Lucas, Tea Boy or Silvia. The hours were long, the egos were flying and I couldn’t take it much longer. That was until one day I made a discovery that would change my life forever – the offices were sound proof.
Consequently, I took up crooning in the gents’ bogs and occasionally I sung Flying Without Wings down the air vent so the ladies would get a taste. Eventually, one of the bosses came up to me and said ‘Larry, you’re sounding pretty good – want a record contract?’ Like something from Shakespeare, no?
I accepted and here I am today. I’ve been flown round the world writing and recording with all the big people you know and love. Because I know and love them too. I’ve got a song that’s got a really catchy, bouncy beat, one with a big whooshy chorus, another that’s kinda funky but minimal but also slightly electro but not as messy as it sounds and another one that’s all loud and electronic.
Soon enough you’ll get to hear all those songs and hopefully you’ll like them. If you don’t, I’ll cry. Do you really want to see me cry? Do you really have a heart of stone?
Good.
I am who I am and I am pop. My jeans are neither skinny nor baggy, my grills are still in my oven, my guitar is yet to be learnt and any ladies in my videos will have some clothes on. For now. I can’t tell you what it will be like in two years time – money and fame makes fools of us all.
My name is Luigi Masi. Enjoy me while you can. I’m quite good, you know.
