Big J profile picture

Big J

I am here for Dating, Serious Relationships and Friends

About Me

I do a web-radio show on BlogTalkRadio.com every Thursday. Click on this player to hear my archived episodes and tune in live on Thursdays to hear me.
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I'm a chubby, lecherous alcoholic who enjoys the pleasure of zoftig ladies and cheap booze. I'm the youngest of 8 children, so I guess my parents really liked to have sex. I play guitar, sing, and write stupid songs; music is my life. I spend much of my time watching movies and TV and cultivating my sideburns. I'm probably the funniest person I know -- and the most humble. I think there's nothing better than a well-placed semi-colon; however, most people don't use them correctly. Sometimes, I cry when I masturbate. I love to cook. I overuse ellipses, but I'm working on that.I'm usually more charismatic than this...

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

This guy:Or anyone else who fails at life, such as these guys:Or this guy:

My Blog

My new frankenstein guitar sustainer thingymawhazit...

(Disclaimer - This post is really long, boring and semi-technical, so if you don't give a fuck about all this shit, just skip to the end and check out the videos I posted which show what the sustainer...
Posted by on Sat, 28 Mar 2009 00:58:00 GMT

How to smoke cigarettes without going broke...

(Disclaimer: Making your own cigarettes is not any safer for you than smoking premades. If anyone is not aware of the inherent dangers involved in smoking, you're a fucking moron. If you're an adult, ...
Posted by on Fri, 19 Sep 2008 16:31:00 GMT

Surround sound, the ghetto way

So I have a home theater surround sound system that gives me a boner everytime I watch a movie. I still have a standard definition TV, and I'm fine with that. I might buy myself a High-def, bad ass mo...
Posted by on Mon, 21 Jul 2008 08:54:00 GMT

Build yerself a nightstand...NOW!!!

So I've been in a creative mood lately and I've been drawing up plans for some different things I need, but would rather build than buy. The first thing I've built is this sweet ass nightstand. I get ...
Posted by on Thu, 10 Jul 2008 21:13:00 GMT

Taking clothes off...for FREEDOM!!!

So, I wrote a bulletin a few days ago where I referred to strippers as, "...just some bitches whose daddies didn't give them enough hugs shaking their jug-a-lugs for dollars." I feel that I owe an apo...
Posted by on Fri, 31 Aug 2007 23:27:00 GMT

For Ruthless...

So, I started out today by explelling the contents of my stomach all over the kitchen floor. That's never a good way to start out the morning. I didn't think I had that much to drink last night, but I...
Posted by on Mon, 27 Aug 2007 12:42:00 GMT

Music and such...

So if you didn't catch my bulletin the other day, you should go here and check out my new song, "December". Feel free to listen to my other songs that I wrote and recorded around the turn of this cent...
Posted by on Thu, 22 Mar 2007 15:29:00 GMT

Kim made me do this...

    OK, here's the deal. I got tagged, so I gots to write a blog with "ten weird random things, facts or habits" about myself, then tag 10 other people at the end of this blog and leave...
Posted by on Thu, 22 Feb 2007 18:16:00 GMT

God hates fags...and shrimp?

Leviticus 18:22 (NIV) - Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable.Ok, no homo-ghey buttsecks. Gotcha. Although, I guess lesbianism is still cool. Thanks God!Leviticus 11:9-10 ...
Posted by on Sat, 10 Feb 2007 22:00:00 GMT

Dear John...

So I asked everyone on my friend's list to write a break-up letter in haiku form. Three people were cool enough to respond. Everyone else sucks it. From Tony: You gave me the clap And you sc...
Posted by on Sat, 13 Jan 2007 16:22:00 GMT