Will you please just listen? When I ask you to listen and you start giving advice, you have not done what I have asked.When I ask you to listen and you start telling me why I shouldn't feel the way I do, you are invalidating my feelings.When I ask you to listen and you start trying to solve my problem, I feel underestimated and disempowered.When I ask you to listen and you start telling me what I need to do I feel offended, pressured and controlled.When I ask you to listen, it does not mean I am helpless. I may be faltering, depressed or discouraged, but I am not helpless.When I ask you to listen and you do things which I can and need to do for myself, you hurt my self-esteem.But when you accept the way I feel, then I don't need to spend time and energy trying to defend myself or convince you, and I can focus on figuring out why I feel the way I feel and what to do about it.And when I do that, I don't need advice, just support, trust and encouragement.Please remember that what you think are "irrational feelings" always make sense if you take time to listen and understand me.
Why fall in Love, when you can stand in it?
John Grisham Books
Do not try to grow us, without us, involve us in our growth and watch our world that we are entering so that the world we are struggling to become apart of will be ready for our beauty and strength.
Although our struggle might seem to consume us - it is that struggle that will equip us to be able to fly above every obstacle.
And not only fly, but fly with beauty.