James J. Bulger--Where's Whitey?...that little blonde from "The View" in a dark alley... Very well then, a dinner with the ghosts of Hoagy Carmichael, Orson Welles, Man Ray, Peter Lorre, Alma Hitchcock, Ben Jonson, Billy Wilder and Texas Terri (she's still living and I know her, but she'd liven it up while keeping the collective drinking to a sane level; shit--I guess she'd be my designated driver). Come to think of it, with the exception of the noted Elizabethan bricklayer, all in attendance lived within walking distance of Vine Street at some point, including me. For dessert, Marlene Dietrich can drop by and do us all. Then Hunter Thompson can serve Turkish coffee laced with Mao-tai and biker crank. THE AMERICAN HOTEL (I lived under the right wingtip of the airplane)................................................... .................................I'd like to meet comic actor/film historian Chuck McCann. I'd like to see David Lynch's art collection. I'd like to spend an hour in Dr. Joanne Carson's Truman room. ...A day at the races with Bukowski. More than anything, I'd like to attend just ONE practice with Coach John Smith, the greatest teacher in all of sports. I'd like to meet Peter O'Toole at McSorley's on St. Patrick's Day (or,as O'Toole calls it, "Tuesday"). Never mind--by Six PM on St. Patrick's Day, I AM Peter O'Toole... I've met Jimmy Fields, Bill Kasmierski, Travis Burke and Kyle Brees; that's enoungh solid, good guys for a lifetime. I'd like to see a good film made of "Handcarved Coffins" before I die. And, oh yeah, I'd like to attend movie night at the mansion whenever Hef's screening "Casablanca" or "The Big Sleep". MUSSO'S (On the night my father died, I drank eighteen Martinis here...)