Walk by Sight, Not by Faith.
I hide behind a "play dumb" persona, because 99% of people cannot keep up with me. I have a hard time explaining my thoughts. I am very aware of my surroundings. I'm too intelligent for my own damn good, but sometimes I feel that I'm not intelligent enough. I'm blunt and half the shit that comes out of my mouth scares people [away]. It's a little something called "the truth." I amaze people with all the shit that goes through my head; sometimes I scare myself with it. The absolute worse thing you could do is lie to me and/or disappear without telling me why. I have a wicked, distorted sense of humor, opinions, values and mindset, but I'm living in reality and IT IS REALISTIC. I think that's mainly what scares people away. I was raised to be "perfect" and have come to realize that my flaws are what make me perfect. I'm the asshole with a pretty face and it's truly what let's me get away with a lot of what I do. People think I'm angry the majority of the time but I'm irritated 95% of the time due to stupidity; and if you haven't noticed, stupidity is pretty much EVERYWHERE. I run on both extremes; I have a hard time balancing. I'm probably the only person you can ramble your deepest darkest secrets too without judgement, BUT I will judge a person by their actions and their reason behind it. If you fuck up, I will call you out on it. If you continue to irritate me with your stupidity, I'll flip you like a sock into my hamper and never look in there again. I demand respect, sacrifice and ass-kissing, but I always give my 110% best when it comes to relationships/friendships. My world revolves around dominance/submission, pack-oriented (alpha-wise), the dark arts of human nature and human-made ideas and values. I'll throw my words around, but I also carefully pick out my words. I can usually sum people up in a couple words and I'm extremely durable, but I'm very delicate and breakable. I've been hurt before, but that doesn't stop me. I have a hard time finding authentic persons, but I tend to weed out the dumbshits from the amazing people I do run into. My world revolves a Redneck, reptiles, rodents and an ittyfuckingbitty chicken that is equivalent to a child (I'll rattle your cage if you'll listen to me yabber about her); all of which drive me insane, but that I adore and wouldn't give up for the world. All in all, I am human afterall.
"I'm quiet, especially in crowds. Chances are you've seen me, but never heard me speak. I hardly ever drink, but on the occasion I do my drink of choice is red wine. I like coffee and intelligence. Most people say I'm the responsible one, always the designated driver. I'm moody and I wear my emotions on my sleeve. I enjoy mockery, cynicism, satire and sarcasm; they are my four friends. I have a nasty temper, though I rarely lose it. My sympathy goes to those who unleash it. I have a passion for knowledge, respect and power. I lack the ability to tell when someone is joking. I am attracted to things that I know are bad for me. I don't like being touched. I am really bad with people in general. I try too hard. I over exaggerate everything to try and make my life sound more interesting. I cannot admit when I'm wrong, it pains me in a way no one could ever know. I am unable to fall in love again. Stupid (uneducated) people piss me off. I am a very finicky eater. I obtain pleasure in showing off my random knowledge and useless factual information. I know no middle ground. I constantly give excuses for my actions while hiding the true reasons. I lie to sound important. All in all, I guess I'm just human."
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