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My name is Pamela and I decided it was time to change what I have written here and make it be more reflective of who I am now. I wrote most of that a year ago, and so much has changed since then. That's good. It's growth and what we must do. I am a single mother to two amazing kids. They teach me every day about what is important and what is real. My children are healthy and I thank God for that every single day. Their beauty manifests from inside as children know no other way. They live in each moment and embrace everything as if it were a game. They love their friends, then disown them them, then love them again. They don't hold grudges. They can teach us a lot about relationships. I'm not sure if I will ever get married again. There seems to be a lack of integrity when it comes to relationships these days, both from men and women. Being single at my age is different than it was when I was a teenager. I grew up as the youngest of three in an average family not without struggle. I'd give anything to be able to go back to my childhood so that I could experience my family again before the innocence was gone. I was 16 when my father died and it is surreal to think that I have been on this earth longer without him than I was with him. I haven't seen my brother in 15 years and miss him terribly. Circumstance. Maybe one day his wounds will heal and he will be able to come home again. My sister and I are very different but close as sisters should be. We often take family for granted and I am trying, as I get older, to not do that as people can be taken from us without a minutes warning. I graduated from college in 2007 and consider it to be one of my greatest personal accomplishments. I have wonderful friends and a few who know me so completely that I need not ever walk any path alone. I don't wear a watch as too much of life is spent marking time. I believe that passion comes from within and is the result of living life from the center of your soul outwards. Real chemistry between two people is either there or its not and there is very little we can do to make it be there if it isn't. I am confused by people who are inconsistent in their thoughts and actions; therefore I try not be. I am fortunate in that I have a few juicy stories tucked away in memory to reminisce about when I am living out life in later years. I love to have a good time. Sparkly things make me smile. I got a tattoo at 35 that I love. Life is all about the journey and what we learn along the way. There comes a time when we have to face our own orchestra so that we can dance on our own and figure out how the pieces fit in the puzzle. We have to ask, believe and then receive...
