We have some pretty smart animals back in the jungle. Take monkeys, for example. You ask them to name one of their relatives, and they go ape. And snakes, they're pretty clever too. Ask them what the 19th letter of the alphabet is and they'll say S-S-S-S-S. Tigers are known for their intelligence, but you can't trust them. Yeah, you never know when they might be a lyin' (lion). But I think rhinoceroses are by far the smartest animals in the jungle. Just last week, I asked what four minus four is, and he said nothing.There are 87 varieties of poisonous snakes on the North American continent. We at the Jungle Cruise are proud of the fact that we have 82 of these varieties in the wooden rafters directly over your heads. Fear not, though, they will NOT attack a moving target, so please try to keep the line moving. If the line won't move, simply run in place.What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros? Eckiphino. Well, that's not really what you get, but you must understand, this is a family attraction.Why did the elephant ride on the Jungle Cruise? Frankly, I don't know, but I wish someone would find out- he's sunk five of our boats in the last week alone.Why did the ape get a job? He was tired of monkeying around. Why did the elephant quit his job? He was tired of working for peanutsHello and welcome to the world famous Jungle Cruise. I'll be your captain, cruise director and dance instructor for the next five exciting days and six romantic nights.
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