Tonya

Blimey! I can't believe I'm back here. Two years ago when I joined myspace it became just another reason for me to feel guilty about not staying in touch with friends but now I realize that I need every convenience possible to stay well connected to the people in my life. I feel quite often these days as if I'm on a mild dose of magic mushrooms, which is the only comparison I can think of for feeling this much wonder. But don't worry, I won't be obsessing over if I'm in your top 8 etc. because that is exactly the reason I find this to be a bit toxic. I will, however be attempting to humiliate the dickens out of you with some well archived photos I have in my arsenal. A word that is often used to describe me is "fake" and I've learned to just own it. It's just depressing that we're conditioned to believe that someone can't be nice without ulterior motive. It's always been my philosophy that life is too hard, how can we be anything but kind. But I am always pretty much in Haylie Mills-save-the world-mode which I'm sure can be grating to people who have to endure me. I'm constantly in pursuit of the next laugh but usually only hear that needle-being-pulled-off-a-record sound. For those of you keeping score that's Attempted Jokes: Billions, Actual Jokes: 0. I'm trying to be a woman of more substance but still catch myself obsessing over a pair of shoes for 2 days straight or rushing to the magazine stand every Thursday when the new US Weekly arrives. I'm sure there is a greater meaning to life than just laughing myself into a coma with my friends but I'm not going to give myself a migraine trying to think of it.