its hard to watch things change when all you want is for them to stay the same. Its funny but stupid how you want everything & nothing at the same time. Its crazy when you want to let go, but you keep holding on, & when you want to move on but youre stuck right where you started. When feelings come & go & you cant decide what you want. When you have so many things to say but you dont know where to start. When you just want to scream but when you start to you breakdown. When you want them in your life so bad, but all you can do is push them farther & farther away. Its so hard to think back to how things used to be & look at it now & realize that things are different & they will never be the same. You tell yourself its not worth it, but if it really didnt matter, you wouldnt spend so much time thinking about it.
i am a DAUGHTER a sister, a grand-daughter, a niece a cousin, A FRIEND, i am a partner, a student, A YOUNG GIRL, AND A GROWN WOMAN, i am confident and scared terrified and excited, i am LOVING, and caring, and THOUGHTFUL, and hopeful, i am sick and tired, i am shy and friendly and CAREFUL AND CARLESS. i am BROKEN and whole. i am misunderstood. MISQUIDED, and misled, i am HARD WORKING AND DERTERMINED, but a little SCARED ON THE INSIDE, i wish on stars and DREAM MY DREAMS , i pray to god, and CRY MY TEARS. i smile on the outside while im DYING ON THE INSIDE. I LISTEN to others who wont listen to me. i walk on eggshells. and i WALK ON FIRE. i believe in PASSION but NOT TRUE LOVE. i love you and push you away. i want you but NOT SO CLOSE. i am EVERYTHING and NOTHING all at once. and ALL I WANT. is for you to LOVE ME ?
