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I am here for Friends

About Me

My name is
I'm in college working hard to have a better life than my parents did. I'm getting my degree in Criminal Justice, with a minor in Psychology. My interest lies with criminal behavior, psychological profiling, and violent crimes.
My Dad died November 29th, 2005. I've been struggling with his loss for years now, and as it has gotten easier, it's still hard to recover from. He was my rock and my foundation, my guidance and support, my encouragement and my hope. When he died a piece of me left too. But I know that one day I'll get to see him again, and nothing will stand in my way.
I have a direction in my life that no one has been able to sway but myself. I'm the only one that inhibits me, and I like it that way.
I'm headstrong and determined, complicated and confusing.
I surround myself with my friends and my loving family. They are a big part of the delicate fabric that holds me together. They are my support, and play a huge role in my happiness.
I'm trying to get over a few things from my past that have a sneaky way of haunting me. The fight isn't nearly over, but as they say, "the force is strong in this one."
I constantly change my mind about things, and I'm always contradicting myself. My memory is horrendous at best, but I try and make due the best I can, regardless. Blogging helps me remember things, so I do it often.
I love to write, read and draw, but I don't seem to have much time for it lately. But the one thing I do actually make time for... video games, and good music. I have withdrawals without them. After a long day of studying, or working, or sitting in lectures, I find it necessary to kick back, relax, and off a few people. If you'd like to know what kind of games I play, just ask.


My Interests

I'd like to meet:

I'd love to see my Dad again. I wouldn't care if it was in a dream, or even in Heaven. But, I want to see him again.
And also, I'd like to meet Cesare Bonesana, Marchase di Beccaria [aka Cesare Beccaria] from the Age of Enlightenment.

My Blog

Thanksgiving, 2009

This year Thanksgiving was cancelled on my Dad's side of the family since everyone has been really sick and stressed out because the new baby has been in and out of the hospital literally since bir...
Posted by on Wed, 09 Dec 2009 22:31:00 GMT

Seriously, I'm Going To Shoot Myself

Ok, so here's a little insight about just how busy and overwhelmed with school I am right now:Monday I realized half-way through class that I was supposed to take a make-up exam sometime that day. (...
Posted by on Tue, 01 Dec 2009 23:53:00 GMT

I Guess It's That Time Of Year Again...

I've been told to make my Christmas list.Honestly, I don't want to. I'm already getting enough paid for as it is, and I feel that asking for anything is greedy. I'm happy with what I have, honestly...
Posted by on Tue, 24 Nov 2009 11:41:00 GMT

The Great Beyond - The Prefabricated Plan

So I've been doing some thinking lately about my post-graduation plans.[It seems like I always fabricate these grandiose schemes, doesn't it?]Last weekend I had a discussion with a relative of mine a...
Posted by on Tue, 17 Nov 2009 07:58:00 GMT

The Trouble With Loving A Dead Guy

There are times when I am laying on my bathroom floor,shaking and scratching away who I am and leaving scabs.The people,they come and try to meet my eyes.They are searching for me;the gun under their ...
Posted by on Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:09:00 GMT

Negative Space

He calls me on the phoneand asks if I'm busy.I say no, even though I havea paper to finish and some cryingto do and he says'I'm coming over.'And the line goes dead.He shows up and we siton the ground ...
Posted by on Wed, 30 Sep 2009 11:54:00 GMT

And The He Said To The She

'I don't know how to articulate the thought that I had.'I guess I just scared you; A trigger was pulled and your words ripped themselves from your trembling body,castaway from the celluloids in your s...
Posted by on Tue, 29 Sep 2009 19:30:00 GMT

Too Close To The Flame

"It's strange how easily emotion translates to physicality; enough heartbreak and your breath just stops. The silence you've always craved turns corrosive; you find yourself longing for the echoes o...
Posted by on Tue, 29 Sep 2009 13:06:00 GMT

And Like The Morning, We Disappear

These false memories flood my headTheories only of what you could've said.Your words, as beautiful as they are,Cast me down in a sky of stars.Your kiss, something I no longer know,Floods my head like ...
Posted by on Tue, 15 Sep 2009 22:18:00 GMT

Because

Broken is never a word that anyone wants to hear.Broken is a fool's outcome, even if only felt within.The way things are now, and just moments before the next, are the things to look forward to. One c...
Posted by on Sat, 12 Sep 2009 22:23:00 GMT