805402 - ProfilesArchive

About Me

This layout is from WhateverLife.com; get yours today!The son of a sprem donar and a prolific lunch lady. I was raised by caterpillars in the Engadine region of Switzerland in the latter part of the 18th century. I wrote a book on kingfishers which was critically acclaimed as "possibly the best and only coffee-table kingfisher book available for under a tenner". As well as writing i also enjoy netball, extreme cross-stitch and heroin. I Was also the first man to swim with wild mackerel. I currently live on a boat in a Aegean sea with a haddock called Martin. I am serious when i say i have dreams of world domination....and also when i say TV would kick ass if i was in charge. I dream of owning a palace made entirely of ice on the north pole...and perhaps a palace on the moon also. I want to make everyone in china jump in the air at the same time to see what the FUCK happens. i want to see if putting to many ants up someones ass really can cause stomach problems later on in life. i want to know how many bears i can throw off a sky-scraper before anyone says anything. i want to punch a tiger in the face.......purley cos so few people have probably ever done it. i want to swim with dolphins......i also want to swim with pigeons i mean yeah they might be reluctant at first but once we shorten the wings slighty im sure theyll be fine. anyway thats basically me......damn i just re-read that....im pretty fucked up huh?.....oh well it is the way i am i guess.......if you want to talk to me by all means talk away my firend and come find me on here......oh the fun we will have.but just tell me when your comin over so i can hide my vast porn collection under my bed......shit i shouldnt of said that.I kick ass at origami when i should be doing other things like revising for an examBy the way im aware this profile contains very little useful information...so much like the internet in many respects....if you do want to know anything just ask and ill try my best to put together a normal-ish reply

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

The guy that invented tipex. id ask him y it always gose a bit yellow. i bet he paints his house with it.......wow dont you love it when you are sure youve drank your cup of tea, but you pick it up and theres a bit left in the bottom...that just happened and im friggin made up.

My Blog

Oh my god a new blog, its been like.......

like....... a Bazillion freaking years!!I can only apologise, i forgot how returning home from work can often leave one to tired to blog. For the unfamiliar, i have started work recently and its goin...
Posted by on Fri, 31 Aug 2007 11:38:00 GMT

Oh my god a new blog, its been like.......

movies, mustard and boredom

Ok so I haven't blogged in a while. I'm not apologising&&.i don't owe you guys anything lol. Basically been getting ready for starting work on Monday and learning how to drive again. ...
Posted by on Tue, 31 Jul 2007 09:31:00 GMT

harry potter spoilers

Ha dont worry......im not going to spoil it......just wanted to weed out the harry potter fans........surfice to say the book dose end with Ron contracting somthing that erm.......begins with C and ry...
Posted by on Tue, 17 Jul 2007 11:38:00 GMT

first monday in july

Hi First of all allow me to apologise for the drop in the frequency of blogs these days, moving out of uni and going to job interviews and stuff really dose mess with ones delicately balanced...
Posted by on Mon, 02 Jul 2007 05:54:00 GMT

My Saturday Night.....live

So its Saturday 16th of june. Im back in tyldesley&&..my parents have gone out for the night&&.everyone in the universe is busy&&..even my sister who is supposed to be revising for an e...
Posted by on Sat, 16 Jun 2007 17:34:00 GMT

sorry its been ages

Hi Ok so first of all im sorry I haven't updated in forever. Many things have happened&&.this time last week if I recall I was sitting in a back garden in prestwich drinking wine and generall...
Posted by on Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:26:00 GMT

Wednesday I think

So im sat here in my room. The day is Wednesday. The time is either 3.55pm or 3.52pm depending on which of my clocks I choose to believe. I am approaching new levels of boredom. I am seriousl...
Posted by on Wed, 30 May 2007 08:07:00 GMT

Saturday

Hello.I havnt blogged in about 4 bazillion years..........ewww i used the word blog in the past tense.....it should be a criminal offense.........like saying "i texted my mate yeste...
Posted by on Sat, 26 May 2007 05:25:00 GMT

exam revision

So i write this on the eve of my first exam......sorry i havnt written in a while but ive been revising and also it was my mums birthday so i had to go home for that.Not much revision happened today, ...
Posted by on Tue, 15 May 2007 14:46:00 GMT