Presently :
It was time for Mourning, but live goes on. So I live, for Her, for me...and for someone i hope. Good sleep Mistress, it's time to wake up, it's time to live for me.
My team site : www.rcm.anv.pl
Contact:
gadu-gadu : 4201814
Formerly :
We are born lonesome and in solitude we die. However sometimes between these periods is somebody, who covers this solitude with her presence, soul so similar, that it appears to be our own, which we do not have or we do not sense.
"...I offered my fear this time
I drank blood - or was it light?
Rain swept my pain into the earth
Kind of strange to be redeemed here
She is both darkness and light
She is both sadness and delight
She is the lost child of the gods
My sister, my lover against all odds
I'll be here tomorrow, I'll touch her again
The Timeless wants me to return
I can't feel the cold that was in the rain
I can be with you again, here, where
The Immortal One would give me her blood
Not even asking if that's what I want
She is both darkness and light
She is both sadness and delight
She is the lost child of the gods
My sister, my lover against all odds..."
When absorbing such a presonality we fill ourselves with It, we wallow in Her light and energy, we become addicted to Her Warmth, this person becomes more than mother or friend or lover to us when we are with Her, abandonning family and acquaintances. We live forgetting about cares and problems, because life is Good and Beautiful even if we commit terrible acts... because we commit them together.
When such a person dies, body gets ripped off the soul, eyesight given back to a blindman shows not beatiful views of which he was told and which were his dream but ashes and deserts, before it will cover him with filled with silence and insanity Darkness again. Searching for Light and understanding, happiness as her last wish was and to forget we prowl the world coming across people, who will eventually leave, forsake, betray - experiences absolutely not known before. Convinced that all the good has happened before we become bitter and brazen, malicious and ironic. Tied by reckless word we gave Her we cannot leave this world of our own will or with our own permission, but every day and every night, every moment is longing for crossing to The Other Side, because She is waiting there.
"...In a broken glass
I saw the splinters of my flesh
I was overhelmed by dark emptiness
Now I understand that it was your will I
Forever shall be cursed to do your bidding
And now I, I will be a winner
Like you a saint and a sinner
And strangely colder when you I see
In the mirror instead of me
And so when comes a time
Warm blood runs like wine
And it's you I see
In the mirror instead of me
And so when comes a time
Warm blood runs like wine
And it's you I see
I am lost but you are - free -..."
We begin to recreate Her image within ourselves filling with it still withering fragments of ourselves, until we aren't sure if it's still us or is it already Her. But can we condemn Her to loneliness once we are gone? Because we are born lonesome and in solitude we die.
"...That craving, silently put out
Will never be rekindled
No world now, just the dreams
Dancing among dreams, spinning among tears
I think I am no longer here
Dancing among dreams, spinning among tears
I think I am no longer here..."
For Izabella.
1.VIII.1971 - 1.VIII.1997
Thank You, Closterkeller for lyrics, which helps me survive .
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