spandex and lightening bolts!

About Me

i'm a mild earthquake. i own 8 guns. i am union made. i am always dehydrated. i bruise easily. i'm religious. i don't have a northern or southern accent. i don't cook. i need to borrow your car, please. i go out, i go on. i love bar-b-q's and cheap motels. i will marry an inventor. i disapprove of chin dimples.i've had this poem stuck in my head for weeks.i've been drunk for weeks.///I feel the dead in the cold of violets/ And that great vagueness in the moon./The earth is doomed to be a ghost,/ She who rocks all death in herself./I know I sing at the edge of silence,/ I know I dance around suspension,/ Possess around dispossession./I know I pass around the mute dead/ And hold within myself my own death./But I have lost my being in so many beings,/ Died my life so many times,/ Kissed my ghosts so many times,/ Known nothing of my acts so many times,/ That death will be simply like going/ From inside the house into the street./-sophia de mello breyner///other than that, i appreciate tacky things, gnomes are a good example. small diners. stupid faces and smelly rooms. all i want to be is an old guy, with a beard, living in a house i built for myself, eating mac n' cheese, and yelling at the t.v.

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My Interests

poetry (not yours), opening doors, turning on lights, beer, writing, reading, africa, factoids, piano, brain enhancers, nostalgia, quitting smoking, travel, laffy-taffy, trains, religion, wrath, amusement parks, orange juice, mozart, lust, god(s), aches and pains, daffodils, bite marks, humidity, humanity, hanky-panky, the zoo, magic, the way a room looks from here.

I'd like to meet:

anyone with a physical handicap. and war veterans. and whoever will give me food. and someone who has the spine of a t-rex.

Music:

sexy, dear god, just make it sexy

Movies:

documentaries and porn. Amadeus changed my life.

Television:

freakazoid, Dog the Bounty Hunter, A&E and the Discovery Health channel gets my vote. Dangerous Catch. Old things.

Books:

yusef komunyakaa, larry levis, frank bidart, laura jenson, sophia de mello breyner, philippe jaccottet, tomas transtromer, jacques dupin yehuda amichai, ryuichi tamura, rutger kopland, pablo neruda, denis johnson, flannery o'connor, raymond carver, julio cortazar, vladimir nabokov, charles olson, anne carson, sylvia plath, ken kesey, milan kundera, ernest hemingway, maxine kumin, philip levine, carolyn forche, michel foucault, djuna barnes, g.g. marquez, george saunders

Heroes:

hannah hoch i respect tornado...tornado deserve respect.Rasputin-- badass evil motherfuckerHunter S. Thompson "One time at Jann's house, Hunter was just fooling around and took one of those fire extinguishers and blasted Jann's dog with it, you know, which made Jann Hysterical. I also remember one time taking, I don't know what it was, whether it was a gram of cocaine or an ounce. But making it into a swastika on a mirror and then just doing the whole thing in one sitting. "---larry levislilithand flannery o'connor. geez louis she kicks your ass.

My Blog

here i am ( a drunk monologue, listening to some blues, sitting in a foreign place, fuck)

I got too drunk to get on the metro. It's not even midnight. Whatever. I went to europride yesterday. And for some reason, I feel like doing this, even though none of it is much of a secret, but putti...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Sat, 30 Jun 2007 02:45:00 PST

I'm in MADRID, SPAIN

so my phone is no longer active. don't bother calling it. i won't answer. but i want you kiddies to keep in touch, write me, touch me, touch yourselves, the selves of yore. update me. tell me w...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Sun, 10 Jun 2007 09:17:00 PST

now that another pyramid of shit has crumbled

i just have to say that i am not a bad person. given all my immediate circumstances, both emotional and physical and whatever else, i'm doing the best i can with everything, and this has been more th...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Tue, 15 May 2007 12:25:00 PST

i quit smoking

huh. there went my social life and initial intimidation. but fuck any of you that doubted me. really. fuck you. i can no longer chain-smoke over coffee/alcohol/post-coitus/conversation&nb...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Mon, 08 Jan 2007 11:15:00 PST

nothing of importance

don't go to school. do drugs. but don't get HIV. .1. What is your best friend's grandma's name?i don't know. probably something like bessie-cracker or lagoon 2. Where is the weirdest pl...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Mon, 13 Nov 2006 08:36:00 PST

i have become a toothache

1) Story behind your myspace song?None. I like blues and blues likes me.2) What month were you born in?October, meaning i was conceived in February, how obvious.3)Where do you live?In a shitty dorm fi...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Wed, 11 Oct 2006 03:52:00 PST

a bee just stung my tattoo

what the fuck. my tattoo is in the center of my spine. fuck that bee.
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Sat, 19 Aug 2006 05:07:00 PST

what i've learned in 24 hours.....chicago, nails, drinking alone, red hair, parenthood, "fly"

1) while travelling long distances with little/no sleep, do not sit next to a big black lady who polishes her nails for 5 hours. you will not sleep. 2) be drunk while travelling long distances. 3) if...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Thu, 06 Jul 2006 10:46:00 PST

emelia: mistaken for a prostitute and offered sex $$$ by the railroad tracks

i'm upset even if i still find this somewhat funny. so, me and my friend portu are hanging out downtown by the railroad tracks on the roof of a building about twenty feet from an important inters...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Tue, 20 Jun 2006 10:27:00 PST

captain's log: coldturkey (day 1)

8 cups of coffee. no food. no cigarettes. all i've thought about today is extreme violence, extreme sex, and cigarettes. i scream for no particular reason, and i hit anything that is near me w...
Posted by spandex and lightening bolts! on Sat, 17 Jun 2006 04:37:00 PST