Joel profile picture

Joel

Well kids, thats the misissippi, the mighty misissip, the old miss, the old man.

About Me

Well, my name is joel, and I guess some would describe me as, 'a baroque masterpiece,' while others would call me ,'a knob.' I'm an apprentice farrier and so smell deeply of horses (horseshit and sweat) for five days a week, and have hands that look wrong signing creditcard reciepts. About me huh? Well, lets just fucking see here, 'a bit of a git, a bit of a hero?' about sums me up. You know, if I'm good I could add years to my life, but right now, I'm adding some life to my years. On the one hand, Jeremy Beadle has a massive cock, but on the other hand, its not so big, but what he told me one cold, misty summers day, was that life was all about the balance, and as I sat there, alone, digesting that profound statement, as well as a jar of pickled artichoke hearts, I realised how right the old guy was. Beadle's about, and he's worth a listen, as is Gene Hackman. Anyway, fear is the lock, fun is the key, so hopefully see you all at Glastonbury this year, tally ho!

My Interests

Arm wrestling kids, the younger the better. The world is a rad place, full of great beauty and actions, and hell, I'm interested in the round, fantastic bastard. ....

I'd like to meet:

dixon bainbridge of course, you arsehole. ..der

Music:

I love anything thats good, you know, does'nt matter what type, gospel, blues, jazz, these are all just labels, cos we all know that music is music...... some examples; Springsteen(he's called 'The Boss' for a reason.), Howling bells, Tom Waits, Orbital(and Paul Hartnoll's solo stuff, check it!!), The Clash, Arcade fire, Bob Seger, Buena Vista Social club, clap your hands say yeah!, souls of mischief, Brian Eno, Pj Harvey, Daft punk,del the funky homosapien, the cars, David Axelrod, bright eyes, Cake, the rapture, the white stripes, Belle and Sebastian, midlake, the rumble strips, bloc party, spiritualised, Sufjan Stevens, Tony Joe White, Cold War Kids, Willie Mason, regina spector, Lcd soundsystem, king creosote, Leanord Cohen, jim noir, modest mouse, Tilly and the wall, Gossip, the flaming lips, John Cale, the Dears, Joni mitchell, traffic, Jack Bruce, Mercury Rev,The Charlatans, Nick Drake, Plump DJ's, Love, hot chip, dj shadow, the pogues, tom petty,the K.L.F, Utah Saints, Nick Cave, razorlight, Pulp and jarvis Cocker, Audioslave, The Fall, The Meters, Ryan Adams, van morrison, the incredible string band, The Killers, waterboys, the king, king biscuit time, the beta band, secret machines, J.Cash, Enya, Bjork, Ennio Morrecone, Pixies, The Beatles, The Dears, Audioslave, Bert Jansch, Beethoven, B.B King, The Chillis, John Williams, Dave and Ansell Collins, Bowie, Sigur ros, Beck, Fairport, Sandy Denny, Willie Nelson, Hard-Fi, daft punk, Peter Gabriel, Elbow, Primal scream, Stone roses, Richard( and Linda) Thompson, the police, coldplay, real live, J.J Cale, pete doherty, dj food, The White Rose Movement, Kings of Leon, Prince Buster, the smiths, Pink Floyd, Young M.C, peter bjorn and john, levellers, the divine comedy, Zep, the clash, Willie Nelson, Bob Seger, Smokey Robinson, The four tops, Fats Domino, Pete Rock and C.L Smooth, Main source, Booker T, Elgar, Dylan, Beefheart, Zappa, Doves, The house of love, Neil young, Curtis Mayfield, James, and the giant peach......... .. ....

Movies:

The egghead prince, princehead, the prince regent, the hound of prince albert, conan the barbarian etc

Television:

Lady Chatterly's lover, love in the Bronx, high noon, football man, the dancehead chronicles, .. width="425" height="350" ....

Books:

The dice man by Luke Rhinehart the Dark materials by phillip Pullman Cash by Jhonny Cash the old man and the sea by Ernest Hemmingway Bollocks to all of you by Jesus Christ.

Heroes:

Laird Hamilton,David Attenborough, Fred Dibnah and Gene Hackman, to name but a few. ....

My Blog

Christian fucking Slater

I was in London the other day, in Picadilly circus, hanging out, and I saw this guy over the way, a familiar face beaming from the front of his head, I thought, 'thats Christian fucking Slater, I swea...
Posted by Joel on Fri, 24 Nov 2006 02:46:00 PST

Hamlet's piss

Hamlet had been sick onto the pavement shortly after recognising the unmistakeable piglike blond lad at the busstop, the bird's shit all over his fingers and some dreadful bacon just made his guts get...
Posted by Joel on Fri, 06 Oct 2006 02:01:00 PST

Thunder Road.

        Screen door slams, Mary's dress waves,    Like a vision dancing across the porch as the radio plays,    Roy Orbison singing fo...
Posted by Joel on Sun, 01 Oct 2006 05:10:00 PST

The pig lad.

One Cold, frosty, summers Morn, Hamlet had left his front door and was  pounding the streets, leaning as far forward as he could in his stride, and having to walk at real pace to stop himself fro...
Posted by Joel on Sun, 24 Sep 2006 10:55:00 PST

blast off

A young whippersnapper, Hamlet David, walked through the ancient woods near his home near Oxford. He walked fast as he always did, even though he was there to wind down, relax, recupurate, unwind, hec...
Posted by Joel on Sun, 17 Sep 2006 08:44:00 PST

mist, a sure fire sign that sun a' cometh.

You know, its a' misty outside, I can hear the cars running and sprinting down the A34, sprinting, running, fucking dancing down the road. They are trotting and weaving up and down the old route from ...
Posted by Joel on Sat, 16 Sep 2006 01:37:00 PST

goat

This is blogging eh? what, like writing with a keyboard onto computer screens, why such a fucking strange word that sounds like bog and little like blast off.     What do i write, well,...
Posted by Joel on Sun, 13 Aug 2006 01:35:00 PST