About Me
The actual origin of the name "Miching Mallecho" has been under heated debate for many years, since it poses several philological problems. Theory 1 says that Miching Mallecho is a corruption of the phrase "Meeting Moloch" a term employed by Tyrian guards to describe what children do in temples. Upholders of this theory claim that Phoenician traders spread the term throughout the Mediterranean world, and that the name is now spoken without knowledge of its history. Theory ..2 states that Miching Mallecho was the original war-cry of the Confederacy before Jefferson Davis banned it under the pretense of profanity.Whatever the origin of its name, the true story of Miching Mallecho has been fully confirmed.In 1799 the Frenchmen Skinny May Giorgo discovered a small stone tablet in the sands of Egypt. The tablet has since been dated back to at least 3000 B.C, when it was written by an Egyptian dualist. The text describes how the sun and moon collide in the heavens and cause a very big bang, a bang big enough to create a bunny, and that this rabbit, having fallen to the earth, was then hurled back again and burnt up in the sun. The tablet concludes that whoever was the infamous "hurler of the bunny" was the incarnation of all evil. A Scandinavian signature appears at the bottom. Such a sensation spontaneously aroused genius throughout the world, providing a solid foundation for the Darwinian Theory, the Theory of Relativity, Marxism and the works of Freud; it is also definite proof for the history which I am about to relate.It all began when a Greek philosopher decided that the only "pure" element was penguin feathers, and that penguins were holy animals. Some argued that penguin feathers were not an element at all, but peculiar rashes caused by Eclipses. Nonetheless numerous disciples appeared who followed the Philosopher's teachings. They were called the MM Nobody knew what the double-m's stood for (some hate-scrolls said Mussolini's mother) so the MM decided for itself. Henceforth they were called Miching Mallecho: and thus was born the world's greatest secret society.A hundred years after the philosopher was murdered, Killer Mario (a Spartan) wrote pamphlets promoting the Miching Mallecho. The group's ranks swelled to such an extent that Roman authorities took notice. They assigned a sparrow named Nero with the task of abolishing the MM Now the Miching Mallecho Holy Book orders that when a machine-gun mysteriously appears in the sky you must kill yourself.Coincidentally, 31.3% of the entire Grecian population drank hemlock on the same night. Soon afterwards the sparrow (Nero) became the Roman Emperor and got drunk.And so the Miching Mallecho became extinct to the human race. A few traditions were passed on by some admiring Greeks, but the stories soon dried up for bulls that became men and a lot of rubbish about cannibals, goat-men, boat-men and she-wolves. But who am I to speak?It was not until the Hapsburg dynasty came into power that the MM returned. A Transylvanian pig had been shot by the infamous Heralds of the Green Sunset for consorting with vampires. In turn a trio of singing witches (dubbed "The Wiccan Waitresses") ordered an Austrian revolution to crush the Crimean oppression. In retaliation members of the Spanish Inquisition formed a quasi-religious cult based on the beliefs of the ancient Greek MM. Their leader, the Spaniard Spanko Thanko, later became famous as the "Conquistador Penguin," who conquered the Seven Cities of Cibola.In fact, it was Spanko Thanko who brought the MM to the Americas, founding colonies throughout the Carolinas. Meanwhile, Miching Mallecho members spread over the globe, and recruits appeared in Sweden, Finland, Cuba and San Marino. The Marx brothers, famous for their invention of the robotic waterfowl, were members. A Finnish member (Linus Torvalds) expressed his beliefs by creating "Tux the Penguin." Cuban Miching Mallechians included Elvis Presley (who came to the U.S. in disguise as Ronald Reagan) and Ronald Reagan (who (coincidentally) appeared in the U.S. as a one "Elvis Presley") made his fortune by strumming hollow boxes with strings on them.)"Miching Mallecho" did not appear as a band until 1905,when the Kaiser suffered a serious exposure to alcohol and announced a band which he said would, quote, "Schlag Strauss uber dem Kompf," or, "beat Strauss over the head." The group quickly dissipated, but appeared later under the designation "Rammstein."Several Americans (unaware of the Kaiser's attempt) also tried their hand at an MM band. They succeeded. After patenting the famous M&M chocolates, the peculiar group aroused national fury by dubbing themselves "Miching Mallecho" which meant, in popular slang, "we vote Bush." To this day the actual members remain anonymous, but the cognomen "Boskopoid Bopper" has appeared twice.Such songs as "Conquistador Penguin" (in honor of the Spaniard Spanko Thanko,) "I Love Waistcoats" (a parody on the great works of Dibbles Hobbledehoy Donnybrook, Chief Inspector at Scotland Yard) and "Mein Chump" (implying a German background) have been highlights of the band's career. The band is also a vivacious supporter of Zuiderveenia, a new republic which has formed in North Carolina.Signed,Boskopoid Bopper
