I'M A MUSICIAN.
THAT'S WHAT I DO.
THAT'S ALL I KNOW.
I AM IN 3 BANDS AT THE MOMENT
SHAT
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the world of SHAT, the twisted brain-child of Mr. Jeff Wood. If one were to actually refrain from listening to this work of genius, they would only be cheating themselves of what would surely be a life changing experience. Doubters be damned, believers be saved. SHAT is here to salvage your soul, as well as the sorry state of modern rock n roll. SHAT is the natural extension of idiot savant, true rebel icon, and underground porno star Jeff Wood. SHAT could quite possibly be our generations Bob Dylan, or perhaps James Taylor with a particular predilection for vernacular references to the more choice pieces of the female anatomy. Jeff Wood, born a normal human being in beautiful New Jersey, has lived a storybook life, a tale as intriguing as it is inspiring TRUE STORY! Several years ago, Jeff Wood, an already budding musical prodigy was forever transformed into a modern day superhero when a stray bullet was lodged into his frontal lobe as he stood by innocently and unknowingly during a gang shootout in Los Angeles. This in fact could have been the actual and factual true Magic Bullet. Instead of killing Wood, it remained firmly in place as he lay a bed-ridden victim, and the small shard of mystical metal began manifesting and awakening previously unknown powers in Jeff Wood. As he relearned menial day-to-day tasks such as tying his shoes, he found that his musical gifts had not only remained unaffected, but had taken on a quality of twisted uber-genius. Gone forever from his once normal brain were trivial thoughts and worries of the average mind, and replaced with a child-like primal mind driven by sex, food, and rock n roll music. With the transformation complete, the world was ready to be saved, and Jeff Wood was the chosen one. Thus, the true essence of SHAT is the basic nature of life: fucking, feeding, and rocking like none other. SHAT is here to elevate the quality of todays bland music scene by writing songs which Wood claims consist of nothing but choruses, as well as liberal usage of the word cunt. SHAT songs are anthems for the average working man, and the misfit miscreant in us all. Every day people who work as laborers and lawn mowers (Woods secret identity being a common landscaper) can relate to the common themes expressed in such songs as Thank God For Pussy, Show Your Tits, and of course, Shit On Her Tits. These are just a few of the key tracks from SHATs sophomore album CUNTREE. CUNTREE is the follow up to the hugely successful underground classic THE CUNT CHRONICLES. Both of these landmark releases serve to prove that bullets in the brain quite possibly give one a supernatural access to musical gifts beyond that of other mortal musicians. Over the course of listening to these 69 songs in 69 minutes, one cannot help but be converted into a SHAT believer. The masterwork that is CUNTREE will undoubtedly inspire legions of struggling musicians to wander the streets of Compton after dark in hopes of catching a hot lead head wound, and inheriting a modicum of the superhuman talent displayed in these tracks. Songs like I Fucked Your Wife and Give Cunt A Chance guarantee to convince the world that SHAT is the future of rock n roll, Jeff Wood is the musical messiah, and were all here to be saved whether we are prepared for it or not.
WWW.MYSPACE.COM/SHATPUNKROCK
ON TOUR NATIONWIDE FEB/MAR 2009 ------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------- AND SLAPJAW ----
Hometown: SCRANTON, PA
Bio: Slapjaw was formed in January, 1998 and has several musical ventures, recordings and venues to it's credit. The band has experienced lineup changes since it's existence. Despite these changes, the band continues to persevere in it's plight.
SLAPJAW IS
*Singer, Jeff Wood who joined the band in 2000. He has 18 years vocal experience of many ranges and styles, as well as a bassist for the past 18 years. Jeff has many projects to his credit (Dillinger Escape Plan, MOD, Pitch Black, Mind Eraser, Tickle);
*Drummer, Dave Kopko who is an original member, has 18 years experience behind his kit with many projects to his credit as well (Anger Reign, DeSpys, Psycho Nurse, Never Ending Terror & Graphic Violence);
*Guitarist, Jerry Kamora also an original member, has 16 years guitar experience and, unlike most in the world of music, Jerry was waiting for the right band to come along to express his unique and energetic musical style.;
*Bassist, Rebel!
SLAPJAW is a unique bone crushing, methodical, aggressive metal blended with brain numbing lyrics that dig deep in your soul and tear at your very existence, create a roller coaster ride that is paralleled by the bands intense energetic stage performance. The band incorporates many different styles of music to formulate their sound, which has them ultimately creating a sound that is clearly their own. Witnessing a Slapjaw show is like preparing yourself for the ultimate release followed by the drain of your mind. Each member of this unique band brings 100% to his stage performance. It is this performance that sets the band apart from the musical masses. The performance is described by many to be the most energetic and entertaining show they have ever witnessed. It is definitely a performance that must be seen to be believed.
SLAPJAW has discovered what they know to be the key elements of success: extreme talent, pure energy, the ultimate in diversity of music, chemistry among it's members and unrelenting dedication to their goal of becoming global. SLAPJAW has no doubt that they will make a lasting impact on the world of music!MySpace: WWW.MYSPACE.COM/SLAPJAW
Road Food: WHITE CASTLE & KITTENS!FULL SCALE RIOT
Full Scale Riot is the four piece culmination of some of the best elements of tried and true NY/NJ based heavy original music. Tim McMurtrie (Rhythm Guitar) former original guitarist for MOD and front man for Rhythm trip has put his best foot forward yet, returning to his hardcore roots by bringing a new brutal sound and lyrics with meaning and purpose providing the listener the powerful unrelenting fury that is the make-up of FSR. With Rob Moschetti on (vocals-lead guitar) this former Pro-Pain guitarist (as well as ex-bassist for MOD) has taken FSR with his vocal talents to a whole new level. His versatility and dynamics range from blistering to brutal, to three part harmony and he brings the face to the sound that is FSR. Rob Youells (Drummer) has held the rhythm down for bands such as dirtchurch, tickle and Faction Zero. Now with Full Scale Riot he is churning out catchy, intricate beats that make it impossible for anyone to sit still while this band is doing their thing.Completing this well-rounded group of war-torn veterans of the stage, is yet another vet. Jeff Wood (Bass guitar) formerly of The Dillinger Escape Plan, M.O.D., and N.J.'s legendary Mind Eraser, filling out the low end and adding a dynamic sound of his own with a signature attack that locks the rhythm section up tight.The songs are original and fresh. The energy level is high and the live shows are absolutely unrelenting. The mixed elements of crushing Metal V-s Hardcore style, and edgy, dynamic vocals has created a completely new recipe for relevant music.
Myspace Layouts - Myspace Editor
MIND ERASER 1995NEW YEARS EVE 2007 WITH EL DESTRUCTOME PLAYIN WITH DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN JUNE 2000
Myspace.com Blogs - NOIZE IN THE ATTIC 4/26 9pm @ AUSTIN’S JUNKYARD -DOWNSHALLOW-CREWMAN NUMBER http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog....
