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About Me

My WordPress Blog! ..I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.

My Blog

A Right to be Wrong?

A Right to be Wrong?I hear a lot of arguments -- on everything from gun control to whether the soul is a substance formed in the fifth dimension. Within these arguments there is a move that gets made ...
Posted by on Fri, 29 Aug 2008 12:39:00 GMT

A prayer you might recognize

And shepards we shall be,for thee my Lord for thee.Power hath descended forth from thy handso our feet may swiftly carry out thy command.And we shall flow a river forth to theeand teeming with souls s...
Posted by on Sat, 18 Nov 2006 08:17:00 GMT

Now Hiring

Cuddle Buddy that loves to cuddle, is nice to roll up with, and is female. sorry guys.Full Name:Location:Number:Height:Age:And why I should hire you:
Posted by on Wed, 18 Oct 2006 18:07:00 GMT

so you wanna ask me a question huh?

go ahead. ask me anything. i promise i'll answer it. if it's too personal, i'll answer you in a message. if it's not too personal, i'll just reply to it with a comment. bring it on! -T
Posted by on Sun, 03 Sep 2006 10:17:00 GMT

Thought We'd Last

I've been looking for love in all the wrong places Should have known that all people are flawed You were my life, my one and only Forgot about the only thing that matters at all I aroused and awakene...
Posted by on Fri, 04 Aug 2006 08:06:00 GMT

STOP BLAMING MYSPACE!

Anybody happen to catch Nightline last night on ABC? In case you didn't, one of the hot topics discussed was MySpace. It is no secret to anyone who reads the newspaper or watches the 6 o'clock news th...
Posted by on Tue, 25 Jul 2006 08:24:00 GMT

A Lack of Colour

A Lack of Colour And when I see you I really see you upside down But my brain knows better It picks you up and turns you around Turns you around Turns you around If you feel discouraged When there's a...
Posted by on Sun, 23 Jul 2006 16:55:00 GMT

The first in the series of Tyler Don't Do That!

In today's episode, Tyler consumed an entire four-pack of Red Bull. In the span of five minutes.I believe that says "Tyler Don't Do That!"Stay tuned for the next installment full of poor decisions and...
Posted by on Tue, 04 Jul 2006 18:31:00 GMT

Lyrics in Latin. can you read them?

O Fortunavelut lunastatu variabilis,semper crescisaut decrescis;vita detestabilisnunc obduratet tunc curatludo mentis aciem,egestatem,potestatemdissolvit ut glaciem.Sors immaniset inanis,rota tu volub...
Posted by on Thu, 15 Jun 2006 21:03:00 GMT

how to kill yourself! (pretty interesting)

How to Kill YourselfQUICK: Fast methods cause less psychological anguish, and provide lessopportunity to "chicken out". Why be unnecessarily tormented by doubts and second thoughts? An ideal method wo...
Posted by on Thu, 15 Jun 2006 00:13:00 GMT