FRANCISCO

[email protected] what can i say about me? I could say so many positives things about my self but i wont because i consider that is not good ,if you could be my friend you will give your owen opinion about me, i left to you that but dont be so cruel lol.... I just want to say some of my points of view about life and world, feelings, thougts and belives My name is Francisco, I am 39 years old, God the time goes too fast LoL. I come from mexico and I am so proud about my culture i am living in NY. I like much to laught i think laught is the medicine for the negatives feelings.because when i do that i felt very good .well not all is positive i have many defects one of them is being very sincerly , directly and honest, because sometimes i hurt the feelings that the people who i love.but i am triying to correct that. In whole my entire life from my chilhood untill now, i saw many , many thigs... bad things and good things more bad than good ones . in some laps of my life , when i was teenager was when my probles appeared .i had many questions with out answers but some of them i have been dicovered duiring my life and i still discoverings. but i do not discovered totally the real meaning of the life. I saw much poorest, unjustice abuse to the poor and humble people. i could not understand it why that happened and why still hapening.I am agains poorest, globalitation, capitalism,war, goverments sistem in general . I think that world is going back to the past intead to the future . I think that the world is getting worse and worse avery single day because i saw that most of the people , goverments , presidents , leaders just take care about money , proud , sex , power no matter if they kill inocent people , they can kill them fisicaly or spiritualy no matter in wich way they does.they only care about take advantage fron each others. The sistem failed and they do not know that this is happening because they are blaind because their ambicious. also they rule the world in the wrong way goverments teach to the society (,childrens , youngers , addult) ussing the radio tv, internet. magazines to give wrong messages they show that the most important think of life is get power and money most of the people think that the money is all they forget to feed the spirit .I saw that many spirit death people are walking on the street.I thing sometimes that they are loosing their feeligs and that scary me because i would not like that can happening to me so i must fight agains that every day that is my own battle figthing agains my person and own desires i try to be an example to the childrens and young people and why not to the addult people too i would like to give them a very good examples. I try to feed my spirit with positives things i try to do the much positives thing that i can every day and that way i feed my spirit may be like Jhon Lennon said in his son "MAY BE I AM A DREAMER BUT MAY BE I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE" i have i hope and that is that i am sure that there are more people that thing similar as me they are worried about similar issues and i am her to find d those people to be a better human been every day becausei can lern from you if you want to tech me of course. I am a man who has been learned from his mistakes sometimes with alot of tears and pain but finally the lesson was learned . sometimes the lesson was not bad or with out pain but sometimes came from something that i never imagine that i could learn from that . i would like to share wit you some big lesson that i animal gave me , yes a animal ... my pet , my cat "EL GATO GRIS" (THE GRAY CAT)I am going to tittle this ... "PROOF OF LOYALTY AND FRIENDSHIP"I remeber that they as were today in that day i felt bad and i was scared because i felt some paint in my chest, the left side of my chest i thought that my heart was not working properly. i had that pain for three days ago this was the third and that day i decided to go to the hospital after work so when i got home i prepared some identificatios that i need it and i put in my backbeg some books to read while i will watting in the emrgency room before they attend me. i knew the watting will be so long . After leaving my room in that evening i said to my pet my cat "Ok gris see you later" is courious , me saying this to an animal ,much time ago i could not imagine talk to an animal . The cat seemed like he understood everything and i saw in his actitud and eyes some kind of sad and worry about me. I leave the cat and my room and i asked to the woman and friend who rented to my the room if she could take care of my cat while i am out and he told me that there was no problem he told me that everything will be fine and dont worry. any way i acalled to my sister to let her knows what was going on with me and i asked for the same favor to feed my cat . The hospital it was not far away from the apartament where at that time i was living. I walked for three longs blos to get the emergency room of the hospital , I really was worried about my conditions , health condition. because i never had that kind of pain before . when i got the emergency room i did some paper work before the nurse called me when i got my turn , the nurse took me the blood pression,heigh,weight. and asked me if i got some sickness and i said yes i had diabetes type two she writes everything in a sheet of paper after she did all that kind of checking that is requered to get in to the emergency room she told me to wait for a while. after some long period of thime i was called and they put me in a wheelbed before anothers ones that were on the line watting for their turn after long time and with alot of nervious i hade be moved to a small room and then a doctor came to me to ask what was my problem , I tried to explaint to him in my shorter english what was happening to my and what i was feeling he listened very well and when i finished he told me do not worried and went to see another patients . more time later a nurse came and she atachet to my body, arms , legs , chet and finger some wires , i do not know how they call that test but she atached those wires from my body to a machine beeping machine.i was getting more worried every moment about my condition i wanted to know what was wrong with my heart .i though that they will give me a quick answer and i hoped to got home soon that same night but i was very wrong because the doctor just came to nofied me that i must stay in the hospital whole that night but the worse part for me was when a social worker came to asked me something about donated my organs at that moment i really got scared because i knew that something too serios was happening to me , I asked to my self ... what if i die? the memory of my mother came fist and then later i remembered all my family and friend even my cat. At that time i did not belive in God much but i though in him too .Is really funny but only in my hardest times i think in God , i am just a simple human one more human ,duiring that night many young doctors came to me to asked me the same questions about what i felt and they touched my body to check where the pain came , i though that they were students because their age . i hated that because they just came to asked but anyone told me what was going on even i could not sleep that night, well i stayed there for two long days and nights in those days they did to me the same test incluiying a run test because they wanted to kno to make sure that my heart was working properly. i thank to God that they could not found anything wrong with my heart , thats was the doctor told me i remeber that when i heard that good news i felt so happy. but i asked to him what was that pain in my chest why i felt that? he told me that probabily was a muscle pain but nothing involved with the heart and i was no worried any more. i thanks to him and God when he sent me home, i missed my home my life my freinds and my cat too . the doctor gave a tylenol pill as medication so i though the problem was not big but scared me much. duiring that time in the hospital i asked to my sister and friend about my pet my cat mi "GATO GRISS" and if they were taking care of him and how he was doing? they told me that the cat did not wanted to eat or drink water and seemed some kind of sad and weak he miss me alot i do not know what the animal can say if he can talk but i am sure about what he felt because i felt the same . my sister and my others friends went to picked me at the hospital while we were coming to my home we were talking about the cat and how he was doing duiring those days , we were kidding too because the things were better the danger was passed. . we planed also give a big surprise to the cat so my sister and friend decided to got home firts and behind them i was suppouse to got sunddlely . but ower plans were brooken because the cat already knows that i was caming back hope ether that i was many many feet bihind my friends i really do not know how the cat knew that there are many question with out ansers and this is one of them , onli God knows . when i entered to my room the cat saw me and he started to run in front of my he tried to told me something but he could not , i picked up him in my arms and i passed my hand several time to his body , i never saw anybody being so happy just for seeing me the cat was really happy. later i put the cat on the floor and he started to walk aroun my self and smelling like making him sure that i was ok when he was sure he turn back and went to eant and drink water i thik that he was so hungry and thirty.PERSONAL COMMENT: I THINK THAT ANIMALS BELONGS TO GOD ALSO AND THEY ARE PART OF HIM TOO . I AM NOT MUCH RELIGIOUS BUT FOR EXPERIENCES LIKE THIS I STARTED YEARS AGO TO FIND MY GOD AND TO HAVE COMUNICATION WITH HIM. I THINK THAT LIFE GIVE US LESSON EXPERIENCES ARE LESSON SOME TIMES THIS ARE HARDEST AND WITH ALOT OF TEARS AND PAIN BUT FINALY THIS LESSON MAKE US STRONGER AND STRONGER ALONG OWER LIFES AND BECAUSE OF THIS WE CAN LIFE EVERY SINGLE DAY. MAY BE MUCH PEOPLE DO NOT BE AGREE WITH ME BUT I UNDERSTAND THAT BECAUSE EVRY ONE HAVE TO LEARN FROM HIS OWN EXPERIENCES .I HOPE THAT YOU GOT THE MAIN IDEA OF ME THIS IS JUST ALITTLE BIT OF ME IF YOU CAN NOT UNDESTAND IT I DO NOT BLAME YOU BECAUSE THERE ARE ALOT OF MISSPELLING ALL OVER THE TEXT YOU KNOW ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LENGUAGE BUT I TRY AND STILL TRYING.MY METAL GOD BLESS YOU TO EVERY ONE OF YOU!!!!!is late and i am tired nwt but this will be contied... Karina "La nina chiquita" en accion.
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Now i am a short man with big heart and with much sense of humor, But before I was living all my life in darkness, but now little by little i am discovering the sense of the life and i am looking for the thrue in this complexe world to be free. And i just want to have a very good friends with heart and grate spirit.
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