Nick

Layout Provided By FreeCodeSource.comIf I were an animal I would be a coyote, mainly because nobody ever suspects the coyote. They are perfectly out of the limelight and left to do whatever they desire without bringing attention to themselves. Plus, they are very resourceful and hard to kill (ie. Will E. Coyote). However, if you asked me that question when I was drunk I would answer "I would like to be a tamarind marmoset", but we all know I would say that purley for laughs...being that I am a laugh whore. In case you don't know, laugh whores are people who at any given moment will compromise the very essence of their moral being in order to get a laugh out of a complete stranger. In other words they must impress people at all costs. Other fun facts about myself...For some reason Tiny Tim from the Christmas Carol really bothers me...he represents purity in its truest sense and that makes me feel uneasy. My goal in life is to be an Amish-ninja...through training and perserverance if I attained that status I would be the epitomy of efficiancy, character, and stealth...think of it! I could construct a house using pre-modern tools, in the dead of night over the course of several hours, with no one ever knowing I was there. I am a communist...but this remains true only in my heart, since I am a money grubbing slave of the capitalist machine just like the rest of you. I think greeting, birthday, aniversary..etc cards are ridiculous. If I could travel back in time I would like to meet the person who first used the word ridiculous and shake his hand. I must admit that each time I pick up a kitchen knife I have the urge to hurl it at the fictitous home invader lurking in the shadows of my apartment. I am an atheist, buddhist, catholic, and jew not in any order of preference just alphabetically. When I was a child receiving balloons used to make me horribly sad, even then I was keenely aware of their delicate and fickle nature. You see...I could not bear the burden of being responsible for the death of a balloon. The last time I cried...was just now. As a child our vehicle was so shoddy that it did not have a back seat and my sister and I were forced to sit on a bed of springs and mesh covered by a sheet. For a period of my childhood I perpetually had strings of mesh stuck to my back. I used to think this was a great story until my friend told me his car growing up had a hole in the floor board that you could see the passing road through. I wish I smoked cigarettes...not cause it looks cool, but rather I feel it would give me a purpose...like I would always have something to do if I got bored or had down time. At the age of ten I created a complex language involving two words that only my sister, my nextdoor neighboors, and I could speak. I once walked on a moonlight night with a yogi and a schizophrenic through a banana and guava orchard. If I could have chosen my life...I would have been a fisherman off the Amalfi coast who returns at sunset to his shack by the sea cliffs and makes a pot of seafood stew for his family, drinks red wine, eats bread, and then plays the violin until his children fall asleep and then ravages his wife...I decided to be surgeon instead.