*Message me before you send a friend request please. Just a courtesy - I'd like to know who you are and what makes you tick!
*I'm NOT here to use MySpace as a free dating agency as I am not in the slightest bit interested, unless your command of grammar, spelling and knowledge (on things more important than the size of your own cock and how fast your Chavmobile goes) is akin to that of this guy or this guy or Stephen Fry. If you don't even know who he is, don't read any further, just retreat back into your hole now. I'll also make an exception if you're Kiefer Sutherland - I loved you in 1969 and Brotherhood of Justice. Can we hook up and play 24 in a hotel room? I'll bring the cuffs.
*I love winter sports but I dislike being cold.
*I like being warm and being in the sun but my eyes are photosensitive and my skin burns like flash paper.
*I could sleep for 22 hours a day and still be tired by 7pm.
*I laugh when I'm nervous or in trouble. This has gotten me both suspended from school and smacked in the mouth on occasion, for being disrespectful and cocky. Which is something of a pain in the ass. Or nose, in the case of the smacking incident.
*I once had to attend grief counselling and ended up counselling my counsellor on the break up of her marriage. Which wasn't my ideal way to spend £50 an hour.
*I was once described as a cross between Kinsey and Sandra Dee. This is because I am fascinated with all aspects of sex and human behaviour and can talk about it for hours but don't actually do it much.
*I have a pathological hatred of having my photo taken. I usually have to be pissed or promised obscene amounts of cash, and even then I usually end up grimacing and resembling that clown from It.
*One of my nipples is a strange shape after unfortunate accidents involving teeth, a nipple clamp and candle wax.
*There is no problem that cannot be solved by listening to Wham! at the loudest volume your neighbours or sound system will allow. Try it. Lost your job? Try Edge of Heaven. Girlfriend shagging your brother/dad/best mate? Freedom is a classic. A bit hungover and lethargic? It has to be Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. You do have to dance along though - get the adrenaline and endorphins going. And the stupider the dance, the better you'll feel.
Questions people never think of:
While driving down the road, and looking for an address, do you turn the radio down? No and it gets on my tits when other people do.
Pretend you are a really good cook, what meal would you make? I am a really good cook! The cheek! But I'd make Tamales from scratch as that's a bit tricky.
What is your favorite piece of clothing in your closet? All my thermal pyjamas. Function over form every time.
Why? Because they are warm and fluffy and stop me from dying of hypothermia.
If you could quit your job right now, and be anything you wanted, what would it be? I would be a nomad. Take my daughter on a protracted voyage of discovery.
What do you think of when you look at the stars? Greek mythology usually!
When you add someone into your cell phone, do you use their real name, or their nickname? Real name.
If you use their real name, do you add their last name? Yes. I'm so very anal.
How much information do you ask for before you sleep with someone? Social security number, pin number and net earnings per month.
How long do you date someone before you sleep with them? *snigger*
If you could meet ANY president, dead or not, who would it be Mister Bill Clinton.
Why? Because I have a thing for accents/dialects and his is dreamy.
If you could get rid of the holiday season, would you? Which holiday season, the summer one? No.
Why? Because the summer holiday is when my daughter and I hit the big wide world and explore. I'd actually make it longer.
IF you could go to any state, which one would you go to and why? Nevada - I have to see Vegas in the flesh to satisfy my own morbid curiosity, and the rest of it looks beautiful too.
Would you ever get a personalized license plate? Yes.
If yes, would would it say? I've been after L1 BRA or B1 TCH for years to no avail.
If you could go back to college, what would you major in? Astrophysics or quantum mechanics, so I could fully understand Samantha Carter and Rodney McKay on the Stargates.
Before you go to sleep at night, what do you think of? "Once upon a time there was a naughty sixth-former and a teacher determined to punish her..." Sigh.
What is your favorite kind of weather? About six feet of fresh powdery snow, with the sun sparkling off it making it twinkle, but still so cold, snot freezes and makes icicles hang off your nose.
Do you find it a bit unnerving doctors call what they do practice? Nope, that's simply the vagaries of the English language for you. I find it unnerving that so many natives of our fair shores cannot apparently speak their mother tongue though.
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? Neither; he's cold.
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? No, it's considered a Hollywood blockbuster.
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