About Me

[10/15/92-2/17/08]
Gentlemen of the jury, the best friend a man has in this world may turn against him and become his enemy. His son and daughter that he has reared with loving care may become ungrateful. Those who are nearest and dearest to us, those whom we trust with our happiness and our good name, may become traitors to their faith. The money that a man has he may lose. It flies away from him when he may need it most. Man's reputation may be sacrificed in a moment of ill considered action. The people who are prone to fall on their knees and do us honor when success is with us may be the first to throw the stone of malice when failure settles its cloud upon our head.
The one absolutely unselfish friend that man can have in this selfish world, the one that never deserts him, the one that never proves ungrateful or treacherous, is his DOG. A man's dog stands by him in prosperity and in poverty, in health and in sickness. He will sleep on the cold ground,where the wintry winds blow and the snow drives fiercely, if only he may be near his master's side. He will kiss the hand that has no food to offer, he will lick the wounds and sores that come in encounter with the roughness of the world. He guards the sleep of his pauper master as if he were a prince. When all other friends desert, he remains. When riches take wing and reputation falls to pieces, he is as constant in his love as the sun in its journey through the heavens. If fortune drives the master forth an outcast into the cold, friendless and homeless, the faithful dog asks no higher privilege than that of accompanying him to guard him against danger, and to fight against his enemies. When the last scene of all comes, and death takes his master in its embrace and his body is laid away in the cold ground, no matter if all other friends pursue their way, there by his graveside will the noble dog be found, his head between his paws and his eyes sad, but open in alert watchfulness, faithful and true even to death.
- Senator George Vest, 1870.
Create your own Friend Quiz here
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Snuffles.
Birthday: September 21st.
Birthplace: Hell.
Current Location: Hell.
Eye Color: White.
Hair Color: Blue.
Height: 5'9"
Right Handed or Left Handed: South.
Your Heritage: German and Irish.
The Shoes You Wore Today: Dead shoes.
Your Weakness: Microwave dinners.
Your Fears: Clowns with comically oversized lollypops.
Your Perfect Pizza: Cheese, with a little hint of death.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Whack it with my LEFT hand.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Bro, just chill.
Thoughts First Waking Up: OH MY GOD MY BUS CAME 10 MINUTES AGO.
Your Best Physical Feature: ... My fat.
Your Bedtime: Sleep is for the weak.
Your Most Missed Memory: Mrs.McRae's English class.
Pepsi or Coke: Dr Pepper.
MacDonalds or Burger King: Colonel Sanders ftw.
Single or Group Dates: Orgies.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Hot tea, BRITISH STYLE.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate!
Cappuccino or Coffee: I wear sunglasses at night.
Do you Smoke: Cigarettes are bad.
Do you Swear: Nevar. ;]
Do you Sing: Only by myself. =]
Do you Shower Daily: Three times a day.
Have you Been in Love:
Do you want to go to College: Indubitably.
Do you want to get Married: Unequivocally.
Do you belive in yourself: I believe I can fly.
Do you get Motion Sickness: Hell no.
Do you think you are Attractive: OH YEAH, I'M A SEXY HUNK OF A MAN! Except I lied.
Do you get along with your Parents: I almost laughed.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Mmhmm. Getting hit does not sound fun, though.
Do you play an Instrument: Piano and Acoustic Guitar.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: I hate alcohol.
In the past month have you Smoked: No.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Indubita-- I mean, No!
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Who the hell do you think I am?
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: If I haven't, I'd be a loser, right?
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yep.
In the past month have you been on Stage: Most likely.
In the past month have you been Dumped: Nope.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Who hasn't?!
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No.
Ever been Drunk: When I become dictator of the Universe, alcohol will be abrogated.
Ever been called a Tease: Every day, except I lied.
Ever been Beaten up: I don't give people reasons to do that.
Ever Shoplifted: I did once, yeah. Got in trouble, too.
How do you want to Die: I don't want to die.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Author, or own my own comedy show, like The Colbert Report. And, of course, dictator of the world.
What country would you most like to Visit: I want to live in Germany for a while.
Number of CDs I own: Not enough.
Number of Piercings: One.
Number of Tattoos: I have a Tatt on my buttcheek that says, "Kiss me, I'm German". Except I lied. I want one, though. I lied again.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Would you expect me to count them?!
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
I have the Greatest dog in the world. His name is Norway.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Music:

I can play the piano, but I'm not very good at the guitar.
Music is love to my ears.

Movies:

I like anything that makes me smile on the way out, thinking happy thoughts for the rest of the day.
I like watching horror movies sometimes, but I always prefer a happier tone.

Television:

I seldom watch TV, but when I do-- Scrubs, Family Guy, stand up comedy, and everything else that is funny. Sometimes I watch National Geographic and the Science channel to learn things.

Books:

Dean Koontz!

Heroes:

Katherine Von Alt I love you and appreciate you more than you will ever know. Garrett and Duncan are blessed more than they could ever understand to have been raised by you, and I am eternally grateful for you having such a big part in my life. You have been there for me when my own mother has not. I am so sorry that all I can give you are words. I hope so much that one day I will somehow be able to repay you for everything you have done for me.
Garrett Russell I am the person I am today because of you. Everything you are will stay with me my entire existence. Your love has impacted me, and through me my loved ones, as it fans out in that respect to impact the rest of mankind. Such is the importance of love and kindness. There is a reason why I say "I love you" to people as much as I do. I never know when will be the last time I see them, and it is something people should always know. I am so grateful I was able to hear them from you so often. It is reassuring to know that there are other outcomes of the same event where you are alive and happy as can be. But why, why am I stuck in this time and place? I wanted my children to call you Uncle Garrett. I had dreams of wonderful adventures and far more memories to come. I had planned an entire life with you. I have never been a religious person, but I know that whatever has become of you, you are happy. And I KNOW that if there is a God, he just couldn't wait any longer to have you.
Duncan Russell We have been best buds for the longest time and I know this will never change. I couldn't ask for a nicer, more reliable friend that I always enjoy being around. I love everything about you.
Rey Ponce You're a great friend, Rey. I know I can always rely on you to be there for me if I need you. You're the only friend who has ever dared accompany me on one of my outrageously long walks, and I appreciate that more than you know. I'm going to miss you a great deal when you leave me. You better let me visit you in New Mexico. We'll go to McDonalds in New Mexico and I swear Harry will be the manager there.
Josh "Bonyon" Baugnon I haven't known you very long, but you are amazing. You don't talk much, but when you do, everything you say is hilarious and full of wit. I love your perception of your world and your philosophy of things that matter. You're also loads of fun to hang out with. You amaze me, you really do.
Tristan Pieper You're great to talk to and eat Chocolate Caramel Crunch with. You've introduced me to a lot of stuff that I had been missing out on. I love you, man. I'm looking forward to chillin' with you when we both have arthritis and trouble getting it up.
Deanna Noriega You are a wonderful person with a heart of gold and a beautiful mind. You deserve much more than you give yourself credit for. I will always love you.
Dan Argall There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are simply an amazing person, and also a very talented musician. Even though we don't really hang out I see you as one of my best friends. I appreciate your friendship.
Ana Kipp Even though we don't talk as much as we used to, I will never forget the time we spent together last year. We were the best of buds. Sometimes I wish things were more like they used to be. You have had a great impact on who I am today. I've always loved you more than you know. Even if you choose to blow me away, I will always love you.
ANGEL! A lot of people don't understand you, and judge you far too soon without getting to know you. Sometimes you can be too different for normies to handle. However, I love how different you are from everyone else. You are not afraid to be yourself in front of people, and you always know the right thing to say. I admire how honest you can be sometimes. You deserve much better than you have it, and I hope things turn out wonderful for you someday.
Brian Carter Even though you're not always as thorough and honest as you should be, you have a wonderful personality and you never cease to entertain. You're simply fucking hilarious, and you can make every bad situation lighter. I could never stay mad at you.
Bethany Watts I remember our conversations from long ago. We talked about some deep shit, didn't we? I fell head over heels for you. You seduced me with your logic, intelligent observations, wit, and understanding. Oh, and you're pretty damn cute, too.
Kristyn Bovee I just love your personality, your skill at arguing, and your brutal honesty. You're never a bore. You were there for me when we lost Garrett, and I appreciate that. Let's chill.
Alec Keough Thank you for reminding me how much you love me every time you see me. You're a cool kid, we really should hang out more than we do. Thank you for making my friend's last hours as enjoyable as possible. I love you.
Austin Keough Everything you do is hilarious, and I know I can always count on you to stand up for me, even behind my back. Never forsake the fro. I love you. "Women ain't nothin' but bitches n' tricks."
Blake Fairchild You are amazing. That's all that can be said. Spend more time with us.
Tanner Brown Three words-- Greek God Status.
Josh Bogart You are hilarious, kind, and honest. I admire those qualities in people. I love you, man.
and ALL MY PALS!

I love you guys!

Odd Thomas, Peter Griffin, Steve Carell, Robert Hartman, Dean Koontz, Josh Groban, Bob Marley, Kimya Dawson, Bill Hicks, Friedrich Nietzsche, and of course, Stan the Muffin Man.

My Blog

To whom it may concern;

I'm confused. I'm exhausted. I'm frustrated.I'm no longer a procrastinator. Rather than waiting until the last minute to accomplish tasks, I never get anything done at all.I am not an idiot. I am full...
Posted by AlecParker on Thu, 08 May 2008 08:13:00 PST

Quotes

Enjoy.(Speaking of Passion Mix Jolly Ranchers)Alec: These are the weirdest Jolly Rancher flavors I have ever seen.Duncan: Maybe they aren’t the weirdest Jolly Ranchers you have ever had but inst...
Posted by AlecParker on Thu, 10 Jan 2008 04:40:00 PST

I’d like to play you a tune.

This isn’t the best sound quality, and I still need more practice....But this is what I’ve got so far. Let me know what you think. It’s the theme of the movie Requiem for a Dream. (W...
Posted by AlecParker on Fri, 21 Mar 2008 04:47:00 PST

The Dark Betrayer

MeAmSnuffles = MePyrodude = Brian on Garrett's AIM SN.PyroDude457.. (11:52:11 PM)-->: youPyroDude457.. (11:52:12 PM)-->: should'vePyroDude457.. (11:52:14 PM)-->: stayedPyroDude457.. (11:52:14 PM)-->: ...
Posted by AlecParker on Sat, 29 Dec 2007 04:27:00 PST

A few things Id like to talk about.

Sunday of last weekend, November 25th, Jeffers began to cough up blood. Jeffers is my brother's caregiver. He was in the hospital until Thursday, and for four of those nights I had to remain at my bro...
Posted by AlecParker on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 09:43:00 PST