I was born in New Jersey in the year 1780. My mother was a vampire and my father was a virtuoso lute, harpsichord and pipe organ player. When I was 3 years old my father went on tour while I stayed at home with my mom. She was killed by vampire slayers. The slayers captured me and were taking me back to their base, but before we got passed Louisiana, I killed them all and sucked their delicious blood with my little baby fangs. I ran into the woods. I ended up in a swamp. I eventually got the thirst again, so I tried to find the nearest sucker I could find. So I tackled a large boa constrictor. As a naive child, I didn't know boa constrictors could harm me. But it did. It wrapped around my body and killed me. Somehow, I regained consciousness and when I awoke I was surrounded by alligators. Even though I was not one of their kind, they took me in and raised me as an alligator. Years went by, and me and my alligator brothers started a dark funk band called Fangy Fresh and the Jaws of Death. After numerous hits in the swampland, at the age of 26, I decided I needed to leave the swamp and fulfill my destiny. The alligators were sad, but they new in their little hearts, it would happen someday. So I hugged and kissed them goodbye and went out into this magical world of deliciousness.
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