THE Orleans profile picture

THE Orleans

Cyberdyne Systems, Model 101

About Me

Hello once again, mon ami. My name is Orleans and I'm a mimetic polyalloy. AKA, liquid metal. How did you find me? You must be terminated. Well, I'll never really know but it would be fun to know how people find me here. I'm just a simple sperm who was able to fertilize a single egg to enter this world of billions. GET DOWN !!!!I like the Terminator movies and the many parodies I do about them.My profile is plain like vanilla but my charm, charisma and exquisite comedic timing are toppings that add seasoning to my profile creating an interesting and unforgettable flavor. I don't want your computer to slow down by loading some cheesy background like most people on myspace. Why do people do that?Oh well, to each their own but if I really want to show you how "unique" or "special" I am I wouldn't be using some program I found online to "spice up" my profile for me rather than me doing it with my own 2 hands. You don't need it if you're already interesting unless you're not in which case you need the extra help. This is my profile so you can have a slice of my life for a few minutes checking out some pix and some stupid videos that I filmed cuz I thought they'd be funny.If you want to know more about me then ask. That's really the only way you will learn about me (if you're remotely interested which ur probably not but that's ok).

My Interests

Actually, I--this may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about--when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me.

I'd like to meet:

Hugh Hefner. There is no other man on this planet who is as lucky or as loved by God as Hugh Hefner. He has the life I wish I could have and someday might actually have. To be surrounded by amazingly beautiful women all day and be treated and pampered like a king and have every desire and every imaginable wish granted by the dozens of playmates hopping around waiting for me to tug on their bunny tails. Wow. I can't believe he was able to pull it off so if he can do it then it's a proven fact that it's possible to achieve a life like his. That's so hella tite. He's in his 70's and he's still shooting the stars every night. Way to go, Mr.Hefner. You give guys like me hope :)

Music:

Good Charlotte, Tupac, Mozart, John Williams, Hans Zimmer, Movie Soundtracks, Game Soundtracks, Harry Gregson Williams, and anything else that I like, Kurupt, Too Short, NWA, Daz Dillinger, Tom Petty

Movies:

Bullitt, Cool Hand Luke, Superman, T2, The Shawshank Redemption, Shogun Assassin, and so on

Heroes:

Heroes...what does it mean to have a hero? Is it someone who on a regular basis rescues people from danger? People are but flesh and bone yet any one of us can, on any day, be a hero ourselves. I think I've helped save a few people's lives so does this make me a hero? A hero is simply someone who willingly sacrifices himself to help or rescue someone in trouble. I admire anybody who has ever saved a life: firefighters, police, doctors, soldiers, and Hugh Hefner

My Blog

Frogfucker

Dammit. I was riding my bicycle home a few days ago and my chain messed up and got tangled with the rear tire and ripped the gear shifter right off. Did this happen in a well lit, safe, comforting nei...
Posted by THE Orleans on Fri, 10 Oct 2008 01:17:00 PST

Relationships Are Hard

Everybody meets new people everyday but we don't introduce ourselves to them so they continue being strangers. When I go to lunch I see new faces, new places and new experiences happening before me. T...
Posted by THE Orleans on Tue, 07 Oct 2008 03:20:00 PST

Empty On The Inside 03-03-2003

This is something I wrote in my notebook a few years ago and thought I'd post it here.  Below is what I wrote on 03-03-2003.------------------------------------------------- ------------I feel emp...
Posted by THE Orleans on Sat, 27 Sep 2008 02:07:00 PST

10 Million Friends To Help Save The World

I was watching tv the other day and saw a story on the news about Google coming up with a $10 million project in which the best idea that helps the most people around the world is awarded the money to...
Posted by THE Orleans on Thu, 25 Sep 2008 12:28:00 PST

The 2 Mexican Gangster Girls From The Valley

.. http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8">.. name="ProgId" content="Word.document· name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 11">.. name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word ...
Posted by THE Orleans on Wed, 03 Sep 2008 03:02:00 PST

Girl From Florida Who Almost Committed Suicide

The Girl From Florida Who Almost Committed Suicide Over The Phone With MeYes, you read correctly.  The title of this story pretty much sums everything up.  What you don't know is the why's a...
Posted by THE Orleans on Wed, 27 Aug 2008 12:32:00 PST

I Love Being Young

I love being young. There's nothing like being able to run a few miles, bike a few more and then rest as my sweaty body cools off for a minute while I quench my thirst with Gatorade. My skin is smooth...
Posted by THE Orleans on Tue, 26 Aug 2008 02:14:00 PST

Amusing Observations

I don't have a particular topic to write about so I'm killing time with these few words you've read so far until I've come up with something to discuss. ...................Hmm, what's on my mind? Well...
Posted by THE Orleans on Tue, 19 Aug 2008 12:51:00 PST

Cowboys Pre-Season Game August 9th

Football season has officially begun now that 5 new members have been enshrined into the pro-football hall of fame.  Life without football is very boring but I never knew how boring it was until ...
Posted by THE Orleans on Tue, 05 Aug 2008 03:04:00 PST

Life Is Grrrrrreat!!!! (without kids)

Not having children is wonderful.  I can do whatever I want whenever I want and don't have to bother about any rugrats.  When I commute to work on my bicycle and get home in the evening I do...
Posted by THE Orleans on Fri, 01 Aug 2008 12:22:00 PST