Disappointment is a card up your sleeve. You are in between things that only go halfway. At any rate, my interests involve apathy, making a difference, indifference, kicking some ass, cheeseburgers with cheese, cheeseburgers with bacon, cheeseburgers with avocadoes, cheeseburgers with extra cheese. cheeseburgers with extra burger, cheeseburgers on sale, cheeseburgers on parade, stealing McNuggets, raging against the machine whether it comes in fax or copy form, and soul searching. I also enjoy wearing leather and going to pro-animal protests. After all, animals are my favorite people, especially when they come in some sort of bun. I enjoy spitting on the ghost and memory of former president and present mayor of hell, Richard M. Nixon. Fuck Ronald Reagan while we are at it. I enjoy the comical downfall of my adversaries but you probably know that by now. Down with Gort Records and their illicit conspiracy to lower the standard! I enjoy making fun of people who think that joining the workforce is somehow a sign of selling out. Newsflash: I am for sale. I enjoy the madcap adventures of Mikeo Likeo. You don’t know what that cat is going to get into next. He is like a sexual prophet in heat with his chiseled good looks and broad shoulders that look as if they may have been chiseled out of marble by the gods themselves. He is a rugged man that lives on the dangerous side of danger. But enough about the devilish charm of Mikeo Likeo, my interests also include making an ass of myself. This can be arranged by using your body as the ultimate tool of comedy. However I still refuse to walk into the Raider Nation store at the Montebello Mall and asking the person behind the counter for a Jay Schroeder jersey. Some jokes are just not funny and hurt everyone involved. By the way, my interests also include making people cry as well as having other people make me sandwiches. Nothing is better than making me someone cry after they have given you a sandwich or after you have stolen a box of McNuggets from them. Did I mention that I also like cheeseburgers?
I would like to meet Maribel Guardia again. Here's a picture of me and a couple of friends and me with her.(From L to R, Demetrio, Me, Dodger Dan, Young Joeka, and Choko-Riki touching his clown horn.)
I better not catch you making fun of my little Nano. What did it ever do to you? Anyway, these are currently the artists featured on my little Nano. “Border Gypsy†Gerardo Navarro, A Perfect Circle, Alice In Chains, Alicia Keys, Alien Ant Farm, Audioslave, Bad Religion, Beach Boys the, Beastie Boys, Beatles the, Beck, Bee Gees the, Blink-182, Blues Experiment, Blur, Bob Dylan, Bob Marley, Bob Marley and the Wailers, Body Count, Brewer and Shipley, Butthole Surfers, Caf
Here are my top fifty films of all time that I have seen. Now, I might be wrong and I might be right. I might come back to edit this thing out, but I could use the suggestions if you have any. I have never seen Scarface or the Godfather 2, so although I hear that they are good, I would not know since I have not seen them. I am only referring to the movies I have seen.1) Natural Born Killers2) The Crow3) Casino4) Platoon5) Traffic6) The Doors7) The Departed8) Fight Club9) Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas10) Amores Perros11) Seven12) I Am Cuba13) The Godfather14) Malcolm X15) Kill Bill Vol. 116) Goodfellas17) Bowling For Columbine18) Half Baked19) The Kentucky Fried Movie20) Eddie Murphy’s Raw21) Fahrenheit 9/1122) Reservoir Dogs23) The Usual Suspects24) Friday25) Soylent Green26) The Royal Tenenbaums27) Apocalypse Now28) Pulp Fiction29) Full Metal Jacket30) Freeway31) Original Kings Of Comedy32) Sin City33) Jesus Is Magic34) Snatch35) Confederate States of America36) Blow37) American Beauty38) Cocaine Cowboys39) Donnie Brasco40) Man On The Moon41) Bound By Honor42) Nicotina43) From Dusk To Dawn44) Training Day45) Joe Dirt46) Almost Famous47) A Clockwork Orange48) Boogie Nights49) Matando Cabos50) Undercover Brother
Some television programs are so much chewing gum for the eyes. I am just as guilty for wasting my time in front of the idiot box. Some of my favorite shows no longer exist so I have to work from memory here. One of those shows would have to be Chespirito. Stop and think about it, where other than Mexico would people laugh at a show about an orphan who lives in a barrel inside the projects that gets beat by the local deadbeat dad and is constantly crying for a ham sandwich? In addition, Mr. Belvedere is so similar to the story of Icarus. The man tried to touch the sun with waxwings and they melted before he could soar and spit into the face of god’s creations. I would like to say that there was no edgier show than In Living Color back when that was around. The satire proved that Saturday Night Live had become stale and out of touch. Don’t get me wrong, I know that Saturday Night Live begat shows that I enjoy like the Simpsons and King of the Hill, but Chris Farley and Jimmy Fallon are not all that funny. The Simpsons and Family Guy are that one-two punch combination that makes television bearable. However you people let them cancel the Richard Pryor show that was one of the best shows ever. You must have been out taking a shit. I can also blame you for letting them cancel Strangers With Candy, which features that Sedaris girl that suspiciously looks like Rupert Casko, or is it the other way around. Television is a form of soliloquy that can make so much money doing its worst that it often can’t afford to do its best.
I cannot wait until the day when I become king. That will be a day greater than Arbor Day. That will be the day when we really test out the trials and tribulations of evolution as the masses tremble and fall in with the rest of the population in bowing down and practicing some of that herd behavior. When I am king, they shall not have bread and shelter only, but also teachings out of books, for a full belly is little worth where the mind is starved. I like to read. Apparently, you would have guessed that by now. I like to write. Apparently you would have guessed that by now. I am perhaps one of the biggest nerds that you will ever come across. I guess I would list “wikipediaâ€, “imdb†and “theskyiscrape†as some of my favorite reading material. Although I am aware that these are not books, I can assure you that I could lose countless hours of sleep researching meaningless trivia like the fact that Freddy Mercury is the greatest Farsi musician, the secret lives of hot dogs, or the biography of Binky the Clown from the now defunct Garfield and Friends television show. Outside of that, there are some authors that I truly respect. For example, there is Julian Segura Camacho. You have to go out and get his new books. That is some instant knowledge. Although I do share some respect for Hunter S. Thompson, I feel more of a bond with Oscar Zeta Acosta. Have you ever read Revolt of the Cockroach People? What about the Autobiography of the Brown Buffalo. I suggest that you get off your lazy ass and get some reading done. You have been reading the Da Vinci Code for a while now. Don’t you think that it is about time to put down that book and pick up something completely different? Besides, the way that classic literature is defined is as a book that everyone praises but no one bothers to read. How much do I like Zeta Acosta’s writing? I added both Zeta and Acosta to the dictionary inside my computer so that I do not get those red squiggly lines under the names. Among the other authors I would like to turn you on to, are people like Lester Bangs and Mark Twain. I usually like to read the kind of books and magazines that you leave on your coffee table in order to peak the interests of other people in order to distract them from the fact that you live in a shithole. A lot of these books are artistic novelties and of course the Rolling Stone collection of both interviews and album covers. I have to say that the work by David Rees is also quite exceptional. At the same time, I cannot ignore the contributions of Tom Tomorrow. I have kept up with that motherfucker’s work since high school. God damn it that has been a long time. I would also like to show some love for Ben’s Snakepit. I know it is one of those things where you either get or you don’t. I would like to think that I get it, even though that is probably not the case. The last book I read was this capsule of interviews of people who know Perry Farrell and the rest of the artists from both Jane’s Addiction and Porno for Pyros. The feeling that I walked away with was that I really hate Perry Farrell, Dave Navarro and the rest of guys from both Jane’s Addiction and Porno for Pyros, except for Stephen Perkins and Eric Avery. They seem like some pretty cool guys. It is not like I would want to hang out with them, but I can stop and kick it for a while. You can find me at the Borders bookstore on any given evening. I am always reading but I rarely buy anything. Their prices are horribly expensive. Maybe that will be my first decree when I become king.
When I was a child, all of my heroes wore cowboy hats and did what they needed to do. They were the law no matter what the town charter said. I think I might be too old to have heroes, so I might have to readjust the question. Actually, I do not know how to readjust the question, so I guess I will have to talk about my heroes and other things that get on my nerves. My heroes involve those people who will go that extra mile just to get that laugh. Although popular choices like Eddie Murphy after he starred in the movie, the Golden Child, Ben Stiller, Jim Carrey, Dane Cook, Mike Myers and Adam Sandler can get me to chuckle from time to time, there are so many comedians out there that you people have got to listen to or even watch. I must admit that I follow the rest of the lemmings when it comes to listening to the likes of George Lopez, Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle. You have to start with people like Eddie Murphy before he starred in the Golden Child, David Cross, Culture Clash, Robert Smigel, the late yet great Bill Hicks and Sarah Silverman. I am surprised at the amount of people who do not know who Richard Pryor is. I would hate to believe that in twenty years more people would remember Michael Richards rather than Mr. Pryor. However that is how things are looking like. Now that comedy is out of the way, here comes politics. You have seen the pictures, now you can make the call. I think that calling me a leftist would not be entirely true. I am not much of a Marxist. I can be seen as a conservative liberal because calling myself a liberal conservative seems a little strange, given my feeling towards the present administration as well as the Reagan administration. I am more of a clown who is aware of his surroundings who would prefer not to be labeled as a product of his environment. I believe in the actions of the EZLN, although I refuse to pay thirty dollars for the documentary. I wholeheartedly agree with their philosophy that we should live in a world where many other worlds fit. I believe in people who see the world as a round place rather than an area divided into flags and borders. I do not believe in schoolteachers who come into the ghetto in hopes of getting their own movie deal. Too much credit is given to Jaime Escalante in Stand and Deliver and not enough credit was given to the students. I was watching television, and I saw a commercial detailing this upcoming Hillary Swank movie where she plays a teacher who cuts through Latino-African American strife by having them become FREEDOM WRITERS. This whole mess got really popular when Michelle Pfieffer wrestled with those DANGEROUS MINDS. I believe that although education can open some doors, I do not think in over glorifying these teachers, simply because teachers of a lesser caliber are more likely to show these movies in their classrooms and miss the point completely. While I agree that there are selfless individuals out there that inspire the future, there is no need to walk over them in the process just to prove a point. I guess I would consider some particular authors among my personal heroes but you can read about that in my books section. My parents are heroes because they fought back against the American dream. Although they do not own their own business or raise any kids that still need to suckle their wallets for dependence, I would still consider them successful. Finally, I think that anyone I consider a friend is someone I can admire to a certain degree. I have to put them in my heart because I sure am not going to put them on my Christmas list.