Dave profile picture

Dave

Damn, that's cold!

About Me


Name: Dave
Birthdate: May 2nd, and I didn't get a birthday card!
Birthplace: Webster, SD
Current Location: Mandan, ND
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Brown, with grey patches
Height: 5' 11"
Weight: Wait for what?
Piercings: No, thank you.
Tatoos: Da plane, da plane, Boss!
Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Wife
Overused Phraze: I could use another beer.
FAVORITES
Food: Yes please!
Candy: No, thank you.
Number: 1
Color: White
Animal: Sometimes, but I'm usually a gentleman.
Drink: Yes, I do.
Alcohol Drink: Bourbon
Bagel: Biscuit, preferably with gravy.
Letter: W
Body Part on Opposite sex: Mommy parts!
This or That
Pepsi or Coke: The beers of Jacob Leinenkugel Brewing Company
McDonalds or BurgerKing: Venison
Strawberry or Watermelon: Raspberry
Hot tea or Ice tea: Beer
Chocolate or Vanilla Malted
Hot Chocolate or Coffee: Water
Kiss or Hug: Both, please.
Dog: Rufus, a pointing labrador retriever
Rap or Punk: Show me a punk and I'll rap his head!
Summer or Winter: Autumn, then Spring
Scary Movies or Funny Movies: Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure
Love or Money: Don't know; I've never been paid for it.
YOUR...
Bedtime: 12:30
Most Missed Memory: I don't remember.
Best phyiscal feature: My trigger finger.
First Thought Waking Up: Thank you, God!
Goal for this year: Make it to next year
Best Friends: Many
Weakness: Getting fat and slow
Fears: I fear nothing
Heritage: I'd rather earn it myself.
Longest relationship: 15 wonderful years
HAVE YOU...
Ever Smoked: Yep.
Pot: Once upon a time I was stupid. It made me more stupider.
Ever been Drunk: Yep.
Ever been beaten up: Yep.
Ever beaten someone up: Oh yeah, but nobody that didn't really deserve it.
Ever Shoplifted: No.
Ever Skinny Dipped: Yep. Still do.
Ever Kissed Opposite sex: Yes. I'm not queer, if that's what you're asking.
Dumped Lately: Take one every day.
IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite Eye Color: Anne's
Favorite Hair Color: Anne's
Short or Long: Longer is better
Height: Anne's
Style: She's got it!
Looks or Personality: She's got 'em both!
Hot or Cute Yep!
Drugs and Alcohol: She doesn't do either.
Muscular or Really Skinny: I'd call her skinny, but she'd kick my ass!
RANDOMS
Number of Regrets in the Past: Not even a little one.
What country do you want to Visit: America
How do you want to Die: Choking on my 120th bd cake while skydiving.
Been to the Mall Lately: Not since 4/06.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Absolutely
Get along with your Parents: Except for politics.
Health Freak: Yeah, right!
Do you think you're Attractive: Chick magnet. Old chicks, anyway. Have you seen my pics? Can you blame them?
Believe in Yourself: Without a doubt.
Want to go to College: Been there. A couple times. It was awesome!
Do you Smoke: No
Do you Drink: Too much.
Shower Daily: No shit, Einstein.
Been in Love: Every day.
Do you Sing: You should thank God I don't do it near you.
Want to get Married: Been there, love it.
Do you want Children: If it ain't too late.
Have your future kids names planned out: Lawnmower, or if it's a girl, Dishwasher.
Age you wanna lose your Virginity: Once you lose it, it's damned hard to find again!
Hate anyone: Liberals, and people who insist on me performing Dance Dance Revolution naked. At least let me strap up!
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

My Interests

My wife, my son, firearms, hunting, fishing, my dog, machining, knives, homebrew, 4X4s, Jimmy Neutron, UFC, family, friends, politics, history, and guns. Did I mention rifles? Shotguns, revolvers, flintlocks, pocket rockets, side by sides, hand guns, six-shooters, damascus barrels, cap and balls, over unders, drillings, single shots, hog legs, muscle loaders, semi-automatics, black powders, full autos, muskets, pump guns, bolt actions, derringers, lever guns, and pistols.

I'd like to meet:

Myself, 30 years from now.

Music:

Turn it OFF, damnit!

Movies:

Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey, Total Recall, The Matrix, Red Dawn, Memento, Tremors, October Sky, The General, The Dawn Patrol, Harvey, Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius, The Terminator, The Time of Their Lives, Quigley Down Under, and anything with Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy, Jimmy Stewart, or Jackie Chan.

Television:

UFC, MXC, Jimmy Neutron, The Tick

Books:

Biographies, Tom Clancy, John D. Fitzgerald, Kenneth Roberts, firearm dissasembly manuals, short stories, The Stand, Larry Niven, Heinlein, Stephen J. Cannell, The Far Side, Calvin and Hobbes comics, anything and everything.

Heroes:

Chesty Puller, Audie Murphy, Alvin York, Todd Beamer, Gregory "Pappy" Boyington, Richard Jewell, Lance Sijan, John Browning,

My Blog

Monkey Lure

Well, I didn't think it would ever happen, but six months ago I finally got out-fished by a danged monkey. I've only now picked up enough courage to tell the story. I'll try to explain just as it hap...
Posted by Dave on Sat, 27 Jan 2007 08:20:00 PST

Venomous Monkey

While I was doing the supper dishes yesterday, Gristle snuck up behind me, attacked me without warning, and started chewing on the back of my leg! While he didn't hurt me, and I don't think he could ...
Posted by Dave on Sun, 14 Jan 2007 08:45:00 PST

Holloween Monkey

Well, there'll be no cookies this Holloween night for Gristle again...he's in about as much trouble as a monkey can be in. Let me explain. A few hours ago Gristle came running into the hous...
Posted by Dave on Thu, 02 Nov 2006 11:37:00 PST

Gristle and the Monkey Bars

My monkey Gristle has been pretty good lately, but I think he is trying to grow up too fast. I'll try to explain...He has been bugging me for a while to take him to the monkey bars. Sometimes I take ...
Posted by Dave on Tue, 31 Oct 2006 08:09:00 PST

Gristle in Combat

For those of you who don't know, I have a fuzzy monkey that lives with us named Gristle. My nieces keep asking me to tell them what he is up to. This is what I told them, exactly as it happened: Grist...
Posted by Dave on Wed, 13 Sep 2006 09:24:00 PST

skateboarding

So 24 years ago I used to have a skateboard. I'd been skating for like 6 or 7 years, and I thought I was pretty good.  I was doing this before Andy MacDonald was even born, right, and I thought I...
Posted by Dave on Sun, 21 May 2006 08:45:00 PST

Fishing

I went fishing this morning and froze numberous unmentionable body parts. I should have stayed home and combed out the snarls in the hair surrounding my nipples for all the good it did me.
Posted by Dave on Sun, 21 May 2006 07:43:00 PST