"Do you wanna come with me? 'Cause if you do then I should warn you, you're gonna see all sorts of things. Ghosts from the past; Aliens from the future; the day the Earth died in a ball of flame; It won't be quiet, it won't be safe, and it won't be calm. But I'll tell you what it will be: the trip of a lifetime." -The Doctor
My Intelligence Levels
Verbal/Linguistic
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30
Logical/Mathmatical
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32
Visual/Spatial
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35
Musical
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37
Bodily/Kinesthetic
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21
Interpersonal
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33
Intrapersonal
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29
Naturalist
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..13
Test Results Provided By
Canada Prospects 1999
EXCERPT FROM Sextrology: The Astrology Of Sex And The Sexes by Starsky + Cox
“Taurus Man" the idol
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Dude the obscure: Taurus male is purposefully vague. Achieving his life's ambitions, he operates best by keeping his intentions guarded and others guessing. He is not a man of action but of reaction, a brilliant strategist who, in both professional and personal dealings, forces people's hands before playing his closely held cards accordingly. Seemingly guileless, he disarms those around him by having no apparent agenda to assert-a strong defense is his best offense. Letting experiences unfold rather than forcing things to happen, Taurus remains veritably stress-free in even his loftiest maneuverings, exhibiting what comes to be known as his signature grace and elegance. Hanging back in situations, he is a master of all he surveys, and like a wide-eyed kid in a candy store, he maintains an appetite for pleasure and no real barometer for abstinence. Romantically, as in business, Taurus embodies a come-hither attitude that wins him the title of the zodiac’s preeminent male love-object. He wants to be wanted, and in the worst way, his seeming insouciance inspiring would-be mates to make all the requisite moves. He is thus attracted to dominant women who’ll treat him like a trophy while indulging his notorious little-boy habits, for better or for worse. With such a powerhouse female, he’s willing and able to take a backseat, often going along for a lifelong ride. In a man-to-man bond, Taurus takes a more direct tack, clearly signaling affection, sexual interest, and relationship needs. Still, he will retain enough emotional and psychological distance as to make a lover work at continually keeping him happy.
Sign + Mind Taurus is one of the two signs ruled by Venus-the other Libra-the celestial sphere signifying the Feminine Principle in the zodiac. Taurus may be seen as the opposite of Aries, which precedes it on the astrological wheel, that sign being ruled by Mars and the Masculine Principle. Taurus’s governing Venus is named for the Roman goddess of love (Greek: Aphrodite), giving rise to such centripetal energies as passivity, receptivity, subjectivity, integration, and any number of other quiescent-themed concepts. So here at the beginning of the zodiac, the basic point-counterpoint battle of the sexes is laid out before us: outward male action and aggression, as befits Mars’ war-god namesake, versus alluring feminine invitation, symbolized by Venus. The Twist, however, is that in the case of Taurus man the Feminine Principle is embodied in the male. Not to say this automatically makes him feminine, but rather that even the straightest Bull guy won’t be a hard-and-fast he-man. Venus’ come-hither energy combines Taurus’s fixed-earth quality to make him that much more inert, if not seemingly submissive, than other men. He is the flip side of forthright Aries, from the get-go nearly knowable-indeed any relationship with Taurus feels like pulling teeth. In making social plans, he has a compliant, obsequious manner, thusly putting the onus on others to run the show-and take the fall is plans should fail. Probably nowhere is Taurus’s inability to be assertive, or just plain forthright, more apparent than in his conversation: You get the feeling he’s trying to tell you something, but it’s not always clear exactly...what? He’s cryptic, to say the least, so lost in his subjective perceptions that he often cannot objectify his thoughts and impressions into words. He hems. He haws. He stumbles. Unable to grasp the obvious in life, he is all subtlety and nuance. Yet this very “inability†defines the Taurean brand of expression and artistic vision: He is an unusual, twisted thinker-the 2nd House of the zodiac, which falls under Tarean rule, is one of uniqueness, branding him astrology’s original avant-gardist, someone who achieves exaltation by going, if just ever so slightly, against the grain of what is considered the norm.
It is the Bull’s birthright to remain obscure, thus constantly arousing others’ curiosity in him. He knows the power of provoking interest, and he employs it like a tractor beam, drawing desirable people and situations to him. By disclosing less and less of himself, keeping his intentions hidden, he purposely forces people to jump to conclusions, which he’ll then tweak to his best advantage. As the zodiac’s subjective male, this boy Venus sees particular beauty in becoming what others want him to be-it gets him further, with far less effort, than fighting for what he wants. To him the Aries of the world are just so much bluster and spinning of wheels, their pointed directness an obstacle to taking in the big picture. Taurus believes that strict agendas limit possibilities and serendipitous opportunities, which might then exceed such expectations. In truth, Taurus makes far fewer decisive moves during his lifetime than any other man in the zodiac: He waits. He weighs. He watches. Then, like his symbol Bull, an essentially still and meditative creature that must be incited to attack, Taurus man charges full force at his goals, but only once they’re securely within his grasp. Needless to say, he’s no risk-taker. And though he often appears to have achieved his successes in one fell swoop, that’s not the full story: Much planning goes into the Taurus’s trademark acquiescence-putting on a poker face is a slick ploy he’ll hone over a lifetime. Meanwhile, in his perpetual state of bluff, he appears the very image of easeful elegance.
Coming second in the zodiac, Taurus is the fixed (center) sign of the zodiac’s first Quadrant, that which is associated with the self and the metaphysical level of the body. While Aries, via Mars, is concerned with physical action, Taurus, in contrast, is steeped in physical sensation, the unseen aspect of corporeal experiences that is instead receptive and reactive to stimuli. No surprise there: Taurus is completely caught up in his five senses, enraptures by Venusian beauty in all its forms. This is the most basic symptom of Taurus’s distinction as the sole fixed-earth sign in the zodiac: He is focused on terrestrial pleasures. The premier pastoral male of the zodiac, Taurus is a naturally docile but hedonistic character, like Ferdinand the Bull eternally rolling around in life’s bed of roses. The glyph of Venus is often said to be representative of a flower, that tiny expression of earthly delight that captivates with its pleasing appearance and perfume. Like Taurus, the flower is completely passive and nondirective whilst inspiring people to simply reach out and pluck it. Aroma is its means of ensuring sexual propagation of the species-similar to the signals our little Bully sends out. As such, Taurus also draws much of his archetypal nature from the springtime male flower gods, figures such as Adonis, Hyacinthus, and Narcissus, in whom we see reflected Taurus man’s subjective vision of self (not to mention his infamous vanity). In light, too, of the sign’s affinity with ages 7-14, when one is the proverbial “flower of youth†these adolescent gods portray malehood on the brink of sexual maturation, still oblivious to its temptations, All his life, Taurus retains this same sense of untarnished innocents, if not blissful ignorance-at the very least, this is what those who seek to seduce him are led to believe.
Likewise, in biblical terms, Taurus represents the archetypal pastoral landscape of earthly delight, Edenic paradise-the garden is the symbol of Taurus’s fixed-earth status. Herein, as Joseph Campbell suggested in The Power of Myth, one lives in a mythic “dreamtime,†a sort of blissful oblivion that exists outside of the temporal where one is unaware of the world of opposites, oblivious to the concept of duality. For, like Adam with Eve, before the fall, Taurus is ignorant that “other†is separate from himself. As mirrored in this story of Adam, Taurus experiences a partner’s agenda as being one and the same as his own. As well, he is notoriously oblivious to traditional gender roles. In the floral paradise where Taurus “lives†(ancient agricultural cultures were matriachal in structure), man is the proverbial second sex, subordinate to female will. But, as that age-old story suggests, there’s a price to pay.
Mythology is also lousy with stories about bulls and the women who love them. One such tale is that of Europa (a descendant of the nymph Io, from whose “prequel†myth Taurus woman takes her archetypal character). Zeus, attracted to the nubile Europa, disguises himself as a snow-white bull, offering the girl a ride on his back. Straightaway, he gallops off across the sea with her, establishing Europa as queen of Crete. Their union yields a son, Minos, who with his queen, Pasiphaë, rules the island, its palace walls crowned in golden bull’s horns, its people worshiping the animal, holding it sacred. But there’s trouble: Envious of his brother Zeus’ legacy, Poseidon sends the kind a white bull, too, demanding it be sacrificed to him. But Pasiphaë is so taken by the virile creature that she has a life-size wooden cow built with a conveniently retractable back door she hops into, bending over. And bingo: She gives birth to the horrible half-man, half-bull monster Minotaur, who is kept imprisoned in a labyrinth and fed the live bodies of nubile maidens and youths. This myth lives on in the hearts and minds of all Taurus men: For when the Bull gives himself openly as an expression of his own desire, as Zeus approached Europa, the result is ennobling. But when he presents himself for worship, a door is left open to corruption, literally breeding perversion in place of purest desire. Taurus does himself a great disservice by not taking a forthright stance in his professional life, too. Simply accepting offers because they’re flattering or prestigious will usually leave him wanting. Likewise, not being the aggressor in love but available to a woman’s advances might only make him wonder what “better†female he might incite to fall at his feet. Easy come easy go. The trap becomes wanting even more to be wanted: Desire only begets more desire. Like the Minotaur, Taurus man must find a way out of the psychological maze constructed by this need for worship. Sure, Taurus should embrace being his laid-back self, like Ferdinand, forever stopping to scratch and sniff the roses. But, in doing so, no doubt also like Ferdi, the Bull boy could fertilize his own garden of dreams instead of forever fecundating someone else’s.
The 2nd House is also associated with value(s), self-worth, comfort, contentment, and a host of other esteemed attributes one might seek to garner. Indeed, Taurus is the zodiac’s gatherer and collector, in contrast to Aries’s hunter-warrior, who looks on life as a process of cultivation. Invariably, he has amassed a pack of friends, of whom he is the appointed leader. While in the workplace, he makes himself darling of the higher-ups. His efforts are often painstaking in this department, as he schmoozes and strokes those in power, playing the part of the complicitous, ingenious greenhorn, just one of the guys, a team player and affable bullshitter, often with a respectable handicap in golf- his favorite sports are leisurely ones-while, with women in senior positions, he’s a walking-talking innuendo. As befits his Edenic archetype, Taurus cultivates familiar ground instead of seeking to conquer new territory, fixing himself into situations and tending to them as would a gardener. Jerzy Kosinski’s famous character Chauncey Gardner may be seen as the quintessential Taurean male figure in modern literature, one who recognizes the power of just Being There. On the surface, Taurus’s fixed-earth status depicts his notorious fixation on material goods. But there’s a deeper meaning: He affixes price tags to people based on their substantial value to him. He is forever subtly attempting to possess the interest of others, whether having business associates in his back pocket or in hoarding a harem of women worshipers for no other purpose than to bolster his self-worth. For the Bull often has a line of female admirers as long as his arm if not another outsized part of his anatomy. It’s part and parcel of his particular obsession: Some people take vitamins every day, Taurus routinely inspires people to fall in love with him. He does little to keep his ever-growing flock of worshipers on a leash, save for dangling himself before them. Then again, Taurus gives the impression of having a lot to dangle. For him, there is an all-important 2nd House comfort in knowing that, at a moment’s notice, he might simply snap his fingers and there would be a stampede of women at the ready to do whatever it takes to make Taurus their man. In truth, he’s terrified of rejection-this is the root cause of his compulsion to procure that harem in the first place and why it is he won’t “make the moves.†Similarly, in his professional life, he feels safer insinuating himself into the hearts and minds of his associates, allowing for such advancements as that might bring. Rarely will he come right out and profess his ambitions for fear of hearing the dreaded word no.
Taurus’s trademark relinquishment of the reins finds its seeds in his early childhood. Bulls of both sexes are generally raised in mother-dominated households where the father, though present, may be passive. As it turns out, Dad often has a more compliant chickie on the side; his psychological absence is thus a symptom of his attentions being diverted elsewhere. In an effort ro compensate for his dad’s inadequacy, Taurus becomes a consort of sorts to his mother. In return, Taurus’s mother showers him with affection, but in transferring feelings meant for his husband, she also puts the screws in her boy. She begins making most of his decisions, disallowing his opinions, stifling his shows of spontaneity, and ultimately squelching his emerging sexual self. Meanwhile, based on his parents’ model, Taurus sees relationships as synonymous with instability and he seeks instead to channel energy into endeavors that might add grounding (fixed-earth) to his existence: Money and the things it can buy-tangibles-become paramount. Likewise, he keeps his friends and love interests on a shelf, expecting them to be available when he deems fit. Such people are his to play with when he pleases, and he expects them, as belongings to comply. He, on the other hand, remains unbeholden. Meanwhile, having been subordinate to his mother’s overbearing nature, he can’t help but become wrapped around the finger of similarly ball-busting women. In the myth, Adonis’ mom was called Myrrha-another name for Aphrodite-Venus herself-reinforcing the fact that, like his flower-god archetype, metaphorically speaking, Taurus wants to marry his mother.
Body + Soul As his Bull would suggest, Taurus often appears as the strong, silent type. Having difficulty articulating his thoughts, Taurus decides early on that the less said, the better. However, he risks seeming obtuse, straightaway giving the specious impression that he’s little more than beef. His body language doesn’t help counter that image: Like some curved sculpture of a young god, Taurus’s very presence is suggestive. Languid and physically at ease, he’s at once alluring and allusive. With sidelong glances, sly through weighted eyes, he exudes a seductiveness that nonetheless seems unintentional. His slow, meditative movements imply a willowy, weighted-down quality-indeed, Taureans are legendary for a certain largesse-which speaks to hours of slow, satisfying, sleepy sex. He isn’t the zodiac’s male love object for nothing: Despite any awesomeness in his size, his inherent sensuality is seen as totally nonthreatening to women. Taurus personifies masculine perfecting on the physical plane, bu, most importantly, via the Feminine Principle, the epitome of manhood from the female point of view. Rarely an overtly erotic entity like the imposing Mars-fueled Aries, Taurus is an eroticized one glimpsed through Venus’ Vaseline-gauze lens. In myth, Tauros was an island of matriarchal rule where men were enslaved and used for procreation and ritual sacrifice. Indeed more than any other man, Taurus fits the bill of scantily clad extra in some 1950's B movie, entitled something like They Came from Venus, about a female-dominated planet where males are the second sex, expected to speak only when spoken to, foreshadowing many a romantic Taurean relationship.
Blessed with Venus’ soft, refining energy, her 2nd House sons tend to be real “beauts.†as the planet rules the manifestation of feminine traits in the body. Still, Taurus is more than just a pretty face. His quiet expression is not symptomatic of limb emptiness, but rather part and parcel of a naturally understated elegance. A list of famous Taurean males-which include the likes of Duke Ellington, Burt Bacharach, Fred Astaire, Bing Crosby, James Mason, Charles Mingus, Richard Avedon, Adre Gregory, William Inge, Henry Fonda, Gary Cooper, Jimmy Stuart, Michael Palin, David Bryne, Richard E. Grant, Peter Townshed, Steve Winwood, and Bryan Eno-reveals a decidedly tasteful lot, thought sometimes with a definite Twist. Taurus is typically leaner, if not taller, than other males in his family; and even when he is small of stature, perfect proportions help Taurus project a tall appearance. He possesses a supple, sinewy physicality that sets him strikingly apart from bulkier adolescent boys. As well, his transition through puberty is slow and subtle. Much to the annoyance of other young men, Taurus is often that kid who sails through his teens pretty much unscathed- no zits, no unibrow, no excessive hairiness. His complexion tends to be somewhat smoother and creamier than that of his male siblings, with hardly a detectable pore. He produces precisely placed facial hair, often heavy on his lip and chin. He has a nonchalant style distinguished by casual but costly clothes-typically, clean, crisp, and 100 percent natural-as he practically lives in jeans, blazers, sweaters, loafers, moccasins, and the like. Despite his often impeccable grooming, there’s something of a just-rolled-out-of-bed look about Taurus, mostly due to his hair, which, regardless of its consistency, tends to appear unruly and may suffer from errant, aptly named cowlicks. In many cases, his hair thins early in life, and he goes bald before reaching middle age. Still, balding only seems to add to Taurus’ masculine appeal.
One way to spot a Taurus guy is by the manner in which he seems to speak to you sideways, a physical manifestation that mirrors his obscure mode of discourse. Truth be told, Taurus may seem perpetually off on some weird tangent, his responses somehow not matching or following what has previously been said. His subjective comments may even stop conversation dead in its tracks, with a proverbial Henh? hanging in the air. In short, if a goofily good-looking man with a body like a young David starts chatting you up (but you have little to no idea what the hell he’s saying), chances are he’s a Bull. Like his totem animal, Taurus’s eyes are set wide apart so that it appears he can only see out of one side of his face at a time. His skull and forehead are distinctively narrow, often so much so it’s as if he’s just been squished by elevator doors. He has a high hairline and a bony face, deeply hollowed at the cheekbones. His brow is fairly delicate, with fine, light hair, his eyes big and heavily lidded and luxuriously lashed, his nose, long, thin, and prominent, if not ever so slightly flattened and flared at the tip. And just as his eyes appear lazy, so, too, is his jaw somewhat slack; and his mouth is often cherry red, his lips full, moist, and blatantly sensual. His infamous Taurean neck-the body part ruled by his sign-tends to live up to its reputation as being ultrastrong and sturdy, never squatty, square, or stocky, as is often asserted by popular astrology. Rather, it is long and sinewy, like that of a dancer. Indeed, along with male Pisceans, the Bull man is, fittingly, considered one of the zodiac’s foremost hoofers. His shoulders are broad but finely boned, though he is by no means unmuscular here, his sinew draped like damask around his skeletal structure. Taurus is like an art-class life drawing come alive: There’s delicacy to this creature that his sheer bulk belies-the feminine and masculine Venus-Bull energies working in perfect harmony. Taurus’s body movement is languid, but never lumbering in the least; in fact, there’s a poetic ease to his gait and a deliberate, nearly choreographed grace in his slightest gesture, from crossing a leg to sipping his drink. Indeed, Taurus man may be most indulgent with his appetites for food, drink, sex or anything that provides a buzz to his all-important senses-other symptoms of his insatiable Minotaurian cravings for earthly delights. Fortunately, his particular brand of natural refinement diffuses any impression of gluttony. In fact, Taurus can make raiding the fridge look more like practicing tai chi.
As befits Taurus’s correspondence to the age 7-14, this man possesses physical beauty that is unmistakably boyish. More smooth than hairy, any body fuzz hoe does have is typically arranged in tightly contained areas. Wispy strands often sprout out around his nipples, which though they sit atop firmly masculine pecs, are nonetheless slightly protruding, budding like those of a eleven-year-old girl. Don’t worry-this looks a lot better than it sounds. Taurus’s back is as strong as a bull’s-good thing, because his front middle is surprisingly soft, suggesting an emotional sensitivity. He’s often long-waisted with strong, wide hips, his lower abdomen pronounced and traced with a hairy “highway to heaven†leading down to his pubic area. Down below, this boy is big, boasting one of the healthier-sized cock ‘n’ bulls ever to be unzipped in the zodiac. Taurus man’s package tends the loose and low-slung sort, a symptom in male animals of low stress, while his ass is typically firm and high below an arched lower spine. He’s often bowlegged, his limbs seeming to move independent from the rest of his body. And he has proportionately large, sexy ands and feet. Still, despite the grace that Venus bestows on her beauty boy, Taurus at times exhibits a clumsiness-the bull-in-a-china-shop syndrome-which has to do with a general deficiency in his depth perception. Taurus man is often actually myopic, and especially when tipsy or otherwise overly relaxed, he may fail to properly negotiate his environment-just as his voice will boom beyond the polite limits of his surroundings, eliciting the occasional sshhh from his mate. To boot, when Taurus is angry, elated, or generally excited, his voice can become strangely high and squeaky, like a prepubescent child’s. But again, it must all be chalked up to his natural, boyish exuberance, rather than the slightest social crassness requiring more serious admonitions. Though his antics may invite some quizzical stares from strangers, such behavior only endears Taurus all the more to his ever-widening circle or admirers. .. ..
Taurean Couplings: Gay .. ..
Aries Flab is a four-letter word, so a no-fat lifestyle ensues; Neither bites off more than he can comfortably chew. A confident couple-sexually compatible and similarly self-centered. In bed, they keep it simple.
Taurus An uncommon gay combination-two narcissists seek an adoring mate. Both men want the center of attention. Togetherness is tense, tempers regularly flare. At its best, in bed, this is a mutual admiration society.
Gemini Gemini's interest is primarily sexual; Taurus feels profound emotional pull. When it works, life feels free and easy. Sexually, they click: Gemini okays slave to the big lug Taurean master; roles are also reversed.
Cancer A conservative and quiet couple-homebodies who enjoy a rich quality of life. There's nothing to prove: Taurus is his most placid self; Cancer takes the lead. Hidden dalliances may mean hearts get broken.
Leo Life with Leo seems to promise luxury, the good life. The Lion, a lookist, leaps at the beautiful Taurean Adonis. Loyalty to each other is their leitmotif. Friends and family abound. Sex is ceremonial, sometimes self-conscience.
Virgo Erudition is the attraction. Communication is extraordinary. Each gives the other endless attention, without resentment. In the extreme, giving so much means enough is never enough. In bed, they're gracious, good-natured.
Libra Taurus is Libra's homoerotic ideal. Beyond the physical, they share an appreciation of the finer things. Socializing is an art form. Food and drink are copiously consumed. They'll dote on each other. Sex is an intense exploration.
Scorpio Evasive, indirect characters whose sexual relationship often remains secretive. Contempt and power struggles are built into the bond. A classic male skirmish, like Cain and Abel. Scorpio's sadism may be their undoing.
Sagittarius A force of nature. Together, they feel capable of ruling the world. Still, there's trouble-Sag takes the upper hand, Taurus tags along too willingly. A purely sexual scenerio is perhaps perferable.
Capricorn A fondness for each other might go unspoken; sexual involvement, too, might stay under wraps. Friendship is guarenteed-Taurus-Cap combos are great roomies. In bed, the Goat's well-honed handiwork unearths the Bull's desire.
Aquarius A bond that's bound to have ballast. Each feels he's found the perfect partner. Dynamic Aquarius introduces his Bull boy to new and exhilarating situations, sexual and otherwise. They raise each other's professional profile.
Pisces Pisces seems that "missing link" in Taurus's life. It's a symbolic bond. Being with the Bull is like a dream come true. Life is productive, professional goals are met-and more. In bed, selfish motives are put aside.