The Expatriate profile picture

The Expatriate

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me


I used to party and drink a lot. I don't do that anymore, at least not like the old days.

I live in Australia now. Why? Because it's fucking awesome, that's why. Do you get to ride a kangaroo to work in America? Oh, you don't?

Well, neither do I, but it's not for lack of trying.

I'm where the red dot is.

I have no real complaints. And if you're stumbling on this, I have nothing terribly interesting to talk about. Most of my time is spent doing things that aren't terribly interesting to others.

Que sera sera.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:


No one in particular. I'm mostly here to keep up with old friends.

Unless we're talking outside the context of Myspace, but that brings me down to the level of those cheap-ass "what r u like lol" quizzes I always see, so fuck that.

Neg reps to you if you're an intarweb cam-whore. Don't bother trying to add me, sluts. I know you're going to completely ignore this and keep sending me add requests, but I just like calling you sluts. Sluts.

....sluts.

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Friends. I has them.

Networking.
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Music.
This is Matt's house.

Matt is a weirdo in his late 20s that would love nothing more than to be a novelist, and hasn't yet had the balls to compete in powerlifting.

I like drinking beer and causing trouble at bars. I like causing mischief by setting up elaborate plots and logical traps.

If you're a girl, I've probably made you cry at some point in time.

I enjoy steak and Indian food.

I type correctly, use grammar rules, and spell out all my words, because sounding like a 'tard is the exact opposite of awesome.

I think pacifism is the best idea ever, until somebody punches you in the face. Then it's on. If you threw rocks at me in junior high, I'll bash your face in when I see you.

Nuclear power is the future. Accept it, hippies.

I spent some time living in Fort Lauderdale, Floria. Weather's nice, and being five minutes from a beach that's basically tropical year-round is a major selling point. Cons: People are fake as all hell and it's nothing but New York South. Class warfare personified.

I live in Australia now. Why? Because it's fucking awesome, that's why. Do you get to ride a kangaroo to work in America? Oh, you don't?

Well, neither do I, but it's not for lack of trying.

..

Specifically, I'm where the red dot is: A city called Darwin, which is capital of the Northern Territory. And it's the real shit, folks. Darwin's the biggest city in thousands of miles, and it's like...not that big.

The Outback is all up in this. We've got crocodiles, the world's deadliest jellyfish, and crazy Australian Aboriginals running around. Different world doesn't even begin to describe it.

who I'd like to meet.

To be blunt, I'm not here to meet people.

I'm here to keep up with old friends, especially since I'm living out of the country.

Let me make something else clear. If you're a web cam whore, do not message me or add me as a friend. I delete that crap on sight. It's gotten better lately, but don't waste my time. Go demean yourself somewhere else.

Sluts.

Things I Like.
General

I lift heavy stuff, when my joints cooperate. Videos of said feats, for any of you that care, can be found at my YouTube page

The Alabama Drinking Team Don't be square, buy some for your ass.

Sometimes I read books.

I write. Not nearly enough, but I do.

I try to keep up with my computer-nerd shit, but that's hit or miss. Still, my XHTML and CSS is improving. Somewhat.

I don't get to rock much anymore, but I still like that too.

I got nothing against the beach, unless it's raining. It was much more fun in Fort Lauderdale than Australia, though. The only predators in South Florida were the ones with too much hair product.



Music

If it wasn't made between 1970 and 1990 and feature guitars, I probably don't give a damn.

Iron Maiden. Ozzy Osbourne. Deep Purple. Judas Priest. Metallica. Zepplin. Dio.

Metal's played out? Fuck you and your bubblegum top 40 crap.

Well-made rap/hip-hop can be entertaining. But note the "well-made" qualifier there. Making some beats with Fruity Loops and mumbling/yelling about how rich you are doesn't count.



Movies

Make me laugh. That's all that matters.

Or at least blow some shit up.

I'm forgiving when it comes to movies, since I'm no latte-critic. Just entertain me.



Books

I'm as hardcore a science fiction nerd as it gets, so that's my usual fare.

Non-fiction topics of interest would include philosophy, science (no shit), history, programming, and, well shit, anything that's "interesting enough".

I know I'm in a minority, but I actually read on purpose.



TV

I don't get to watch much of this any more, and it's just as well.

Favorites at the moment are Gordon Ramsay's cooking shows, which are just a fucking riot, and any of the BBC documentaries we get down this way.

Aussie politics are a good barrel of laughs too.



Miscellany

I'm not sure what else there is to mention. I like a lot of things, and I like to do a lot of things.



Details you don't care about. ..
Status Married, happily.
Here For Not cam-whore spam, that's for sure.
Hometown Birmingham, Alabamer
Body Type 5'9 (or 178cm) / I workout. Not a bodybuilder, and athletic sounds prissy.
Ethnicity White bread
Religion Deist. Maybe Atheist.
Smoke? Naw.
Drink? You bet.
Politics Libertarian Socialist
Education BS Criminal Justice
University of Alabama at Birmingham
Occupation Writer (aka, unemployed) ..Links.

MattPerryman.com My blog, in the loosest sense of the word
Amped Training My slightly more serious attempt to write about strength training and exercise related topics
Body Recomposition Forums It's supposed to be about dieting...really...
Ubuntu Forums Discussion and tech support for Ubuntu Linux
Wikipedia Use this to look up all the big words I wrote that you don't understand

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Comments don't show up here, since it breaks the page flow, and I love me some page flow.

But don't worry, they're going through. You can see them on the comment page.

Randomness and Miscellany.

Please don't message me or leave comments asking for help with your Myspace page. I mean, I'll do it, but not for free.

If you want to know how to tweak it for the real deal, you should check out HyalineSkies or 5ThirtyOne . They're the ones that graciously provided the template and customization process I used to do this, and there's in-depth tutorials on how it's done. You'll need to have some competence in HTML and CSS, and a little graphic design skill wouldn't hurt either.

Yes, the logo is written in Iron Maiden's font.

I'd suggest Firefox to view this site properly. Then again, I also suggest using Linux over Windows, and we see how far that's gotten. If you insist on using Micro$oft products, I can't guarantee this will work correctly.

Contacting Me.

It should be easy enough to just send me a message via Myspace. I usually get back to you. Odds of me getting back to you go up if you can actually write in English.

But if for some reason you need more, I'm around.

Instant Messenger : PwrManDL
Email : Click to Email 2008. Matt is badass.best viewed in Firefox | layout based on Dark Overlay by 5ThirtyOne

My Blog

Things I’ve Learned About Australia (and New Zealand)

So in a few hours I'll be on the plane back to the US, and I have to say I'm really not looking forward to it.Australia and New Zealand are eye-openers if you've never been out of the States, even as ...
Posted by on Tue, 02 Oct 2007 14:00:00 GMT

Pics from Down Under

I finally got around to resizing some pics from earlier, back in Sydney.I already uploaded them to a Photobucket album, so it's easier just to link that here instead of trying to upload them all to My...
Posted by on Wed, 11 Jul 2007 17:00:00 GMT

G'day!

Cheesy title, but to those Americans among you (most of you I'm assuming) you'll get the idea.I've been in Australia for about three weeks now. I have to say I really like it. It's very similar to the...
Posted by on Sat, 16 Jun 2007 15:30:00 GMT

The Air & Sea Show

So we hit up the beach yesterday for this. I was actually quite surprised (in a good way). A1A, the main beach road, was blocked off and filled with vendors as well as droves of people.Unfortunately I...
Posted by on Sun, 07 May 2006 17:20:00 GMT

Christmas Bitching

Despite the title, this actually has nothing to do with Christmas itself. Since the Alabama Drinking Team site is on indefinite hiatus for now, I really have no forum besides this to express my vitrio...
Posted by on Sat, 24 Dec 2005 12:00:00 GMT