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About Me

"I'm Not A Man, I'm A Machine, Chisel Me Down Until I Am Clean, I Write Books, I Never Read..."

"...AND THEN I'LL TELL YOU SOME MORE ABOUT..."

"ME"

Newby? Who Is This Phantom Guy? Hey Hey I Rule. I Love My Mates, And The Stuff We Get Up To. I Love Football (Live, Eat, Sleep etc) And Rocking The F**k Out. Famed For Liking Minority Music, I Love Going Gigging, Skanking And Getting Sweaty Amongst People I Don't Know. I Go To Birmingham "Holla Holla Whuuuuuuut" University, Looking Real Big Tonight Up In Da 6 Winnie Road Lads Zone. I Used To Work For Tescov, Then Left...BUT NOW I FIND MYSELF BACK, HOW GAY/STRANGE IS LIFE?! If I Was A Sport Competition, I'd Be Twenty20 Cup Finals Day, If I Was An Ice Cream, I'd Be Cookie Dough. Enough With The Similies, I'm Far Too Metaphorical For All That. Read On Messiah, For Newbyland Is A Place Of Fun And Frolics, All With Questionable Intent...
This Is What We Got Up To In Winter:
...And This Is What We're Doing This Summer:
Golff

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My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Carmen Electra...For Hardcore Sex, Baby! Also, Myself In A Red Dwarf-Inspired Time-Travel Adventure, To Take Place In A Future Life. Finally, Many More Cool And/Or Leftfield People In The 2 Years I Have Left At Uni!

My Blog

WE RAVED ON!!

Here For The World Are, In No Particular Order, The Best Things About The Ravest Rave Ever Raved: > Ste destroying the curtain rail...and the air vent...and anything else within his path of mass destr...
Posted by on Sat, 23 Dec 2006 06:17:00 GMT

Kebab-Sex, baby

Kebabs. And Why They Are Better Than Having Sex With A Woman. * Kebabs NEVER ask to marry you, and don't get stroppy if you don't agree. * Kebabs don't believe in commitment, short-term lovi...
Posted by on Thu, 10 Aug 2006 04:26:00 GMT

Things What Were Discovered By Me (And Are Marginally Important To Mankind): College Edition

With the end of college in mind, I think its time for a special King Eddies version of my hideously lengthy-named-but-now-infamous blog entry, here goes some more things which have enriched my life ex...
Posted by on Sun, 30 Jul 2006 04:23:00 GMT