This layout was handmade with love by the folks at My space or yours? Go get one!
"It's the mentality of FEARLESSNESS that I have fallen HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE with. It's so clear to me, what God has for me, is for me. His promise to deliver, lets me know, it's okay to slow down and bask in His magnificence that surrounds me. Now I take time to smell the roses, notice the butterflies above and the tiny ladybugs below - it's those extra few minutes that help me remember every glorifying detail when the seasons change. Because the seasons [WILL] change. Embrace the tough times that come with change. God has promised, tough times are ONLY temporary, the sunshine [ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS] returns." - Nina BrownWho am I? I am fearless. I am blessed. I am HIGHLY favored by God. I am happy. I am humble. I am still learning. I am the mother of an incredible 8-year old named Jaylen. I am the girlfriend of Eric Williams aka Laid Back Black. I am the Producer of the Frank & Wanda Morning Show on V-103. I am a Virgo. I am a perfectionist. I am the God Mother of Isaiah Carter & Baby Pat Pat. I am the Auntie of Kyren Brown, Pele Penina & Baby VJ. I am the big sister to Ashley & Marissa. I am the bossy sister to 3 brothers, Allen, Marcus & Randy. I am of Samoan & Black Heritage. I am a Ski Gul. I am a BTown Forever. I am focused. I am a mentor. I am addicted to swag.I am a writer. I am stubborn. I am always in my Uggs & True Religion's. I am not a morning person. I am so in love with my mom. I am a daddy's girl at heart. I am 6 feet tall. I am praying for patience. I am sensitive. I am a visionary. I am in the industry. I am a person of character & integrity. I am over protective of my loved ones. I am a good girl. I am a leader. I am in love with God. I am the Black Carrie Bradshaw, who paints pictures with words to remember life's most amazing memories.I am one of the few people who can say, I am fearlessly living my dream and loving my life. I have learned so much about me in the last 3 years and I have truly come full circle. My story is a simple one. Since an early age, I have always dreamed about working in radio. After realizing, life was too short to settle for mediocrity, I decided it was time to chase my dreams. It wasn't easy getting here, but it's where God wanted me to be, so I survived the hard times and now I'm able to tell my story. My testimony is what makes me special. In 2003, I was driving down I-85 and heard a commercial on V-103 advertising the Connecticut School of Broadcasting and a light bulb instantly went off. I instantly knew CSB was the missing link I needed and I couldn't waste another day! I immediately enrolled at CSB and the grind became my reality. I was in school again, working 55 hours a week as a collections manager and the mother of a very rambunctious little boy who maintained a schedule like he was running corporations! Life was in full speed, and I loved every bit of it. I quickly learned there was a MAJOR difference between "the grind" and "a hustle". Many people mistake the two or think they are one in the same, but they aren't. [If you haven't figured the difference, please ask me about it! It will MAKE you or BREAK you, trust!] I completed the program at CSB and started my internship at V-103 in the sales department on Jan. 3rd, 2005. At the time, I didn't understand how important it was to "plant my seed where I wanted to grow," I was just anxious to get my foot in the door. Interning in the sales department was another test of my patience & passion because all I did was sit in a quiet room and file tons of invoices. I remember thinking, I want to be where the action is, but I wouldn't dare complain, I had to pay my dues! I was determined to be the best at everything within my control, so at that point; I had to be the BEST damn paper-filer V-103 had ever seen! That was my philosophy from the beginning, be the best at everything and get as many people as possible saying good things about me, the newest intern. This philosophy worked because after I transferred to the promotions department, I got the offer to become a part-time employee after only 2 months of interning! I remember transitioning from corporate America to the radio industry full time. At that point in my corporate career, I was making $60,000 a year, owned 4 homes, drove a decent SUV, and had secured the “American dream†but I still wasn't happy. In my heart, I knew, God didn't put me on Earth to collect bad debt and manage a collections agency of 20. While I had obtained all of the tangible things that people work years for, by the time I was 23, I was still looking to fill an obvious void in my life. It was at that point that I started to think about my life in a more spiritual way. I began planning for “tomorrow†instead of craving instant gratification. I started writing down my long term goals and brainstorming the short term goals that would get me closer to fulfilling my ultimate dream (this is when I understood the "grind" vs. the "hustle"). The transition from Corporate America's feeling of Security to the "No Guarantee Entertainment Industry" was a scary one. It was scary because I felt like I was so close to breaking away from society's trap, but I was treading on unknown territory and worried if I was making the right decisions. No one really understood what I was going through at that time, so a lot of the decisions I made were ones I made on my own, with little guidance from loved ones. While many people said, "You would be perfect in radio" the same people couldn't understand how I could throw away so much financial success as a department manager at my corporate job. In one hand, I had crystal-clear vision, in the other; I had dreadful fear and couldn't see the step before me. Like it happened yesterday, I remember having to figure out what I was willing to sacrifice in order to fulfill my dreams. I had to simplify a very complicated time in my life and ask myself several complex questions and only allow yes or no answers. Was I willing to sacrifice a very comfortable salary that afforded me everything I desired in life for long term happiness? Yes! Was I willing to sacrifice time with loved ones for life fulfillment? Yes! Was I willing to trade in my 8 hours of sleep per night for 3 or 4 to make my dream my reality? Yes! Was I willing to sacrifice my flawless credit score of 750 for spiritual growth? Yes! Once I determined what sacrifices I was willing to make, I was able to go through with the transition. When I walked away from my "comfort zone", I had no idea what was in store. I walked out on a leap of faith and set out on a path to win. I was so determined to make it, and was willing to sacrifice everything I had. Losing wasn't an option for me after giving up so much. Let me be honest with you, I went from making $60,000 a year to LESS than $25,000 a year. In less than a year after quitting my "good" job, my savings account hit ZERO, my retirement account was completely withdrawn and my credit cards were maxed out. When I went thru the financial despair, I began having these crazy panic attacks. My financial worry would take over my entire thought process and I would be in tears at the very thought of it. I felt stress like I had never felt before. Until that point, I had never paid a bill late and had never known what it felt like to not have access to money for everyday expenses. Until that point, I was so proud of my 750 credit score. I was raised to believe that credit was EVERYTHING! Yes, a 3-digit number somehow could determine my happiness? I had become accustomed to hearing banks tell me, I could buy ANYTHING I wanted with my impressive credit, but now, my credit score was quickly diminishing with every late credit card invoice I received. I started to second guess everything and contemplated giving up. I knew I could easily get another job as a manager; I almost threw in the towel on several days! Things turned around one Sunday as I sat in church and listened to the sermon Bishop Eddie Long gave to his New Birth congregation regarding "worry". Bishop talked about us being so overly worried about our own problems because we didn't think God was capable of handling them for us. Bishop said, instead of trusting God like we are supposed to, we allow our worry to take over our faith, and as people, we're constantly trying to figure out solutions in the secular world when we should put our faith in the man above and watch Him fulfill His spiritual promises. I remember thinking, "Wow, it's that simple! All I have to do is restore my faith and trust in God like I'm supposed to. It’s time to release this anxiety and trust that my Father in Heaven would never put me in a position I can’t handle. If I worry, I need not pray, but if I pray; I need not worry." I had to choose, because it was spiritually impossible to do both; pray and still worry. I realized, the message I'd been sending God is one that tells Him I didn't trust Him and I didn't have real faith. I was "all words" but no action. It was that very Sunday that I let go of all of financial worry and re-applied that energy! I had to reflect on the time right before my transition when I asked myself what I was willing to sacrifice. I had to remind myself, my financial security and flawless credit were 2 things I decided to pledge for long term happiness, so now wasn't the time to act surprised that things were hitting rock bottom. Like so many, I had the spirit of fear in my heart. Once I made it thru this phase, the weight of the world seemed to be lifted from my shoulders and I was able to move faster. All because I simply put my faith back in God and trusted Him totally. I let my faithful actions, speak louder than my convincing words and just like Bishop told me, God handled the problems I was stressing over. Things began moving so fast for me. As previously mentioned, I was hired part-time in the Promotions department after interning for only 2 months. Although I made it on payroll at the radio station, the money I was making couldn't even afford the gas to get to and from work. It was a known fact, in the industry, you literally have to start from the bottom in position AND pay and work your way up from there. I was officially at the bottom & in the beginning, and the road to the top was going to be a long one. Ironically, you would never know I was at the "bottom" in position and pay because when you saw me, I was smiling like I ranked at the top. I was making the least amount of money I had made in my life and felt like I had more riches than Trump & Oprah, combined. In my world, I was officially working in radio and that was enough to keep me going. More importantly, God kept showing me confirmations that I was on the right track. Doors that had huge, stubborn and impossible to remove dead bolts were opening effortlessly for me. It was an amazing sight to see. The doors that remained closed to others before me, had bright, fluorescent signs that read, "Nina Brown, come right in!" My confirmations were that obvious! God's favor became more and more evident and with each day, I was getting closer and closer to my ultimate goals. People who knew my story would ask me, “Aren’t you frustrated with being at the bottom?†and "Aren't you tired of making no money?" and I would smile and simply say, “Nah, my blessings are coming… I’m just paying my dues." I tried to explain to people, compared to so many, my life had been easy. This was the first time, God made me work for something I really wanted and I wouldn't dare look for a shortcut or hand-out. God was putting me thru the "test" in order to give me my testimony. I was willing to invest as much time as I needed to reach the final destination because I knew, the final destination would be so amazing and so beautiful. I tried to explain to the doubters and the worried; God had already chosen me and had been telling me not to give up, because He had something in store for me... Something bigger than I could have ever imagined. Some people understood my spiritual confirmations, some didn’t, but it didn't matter because I understood every bit of it! My God had never let me down and He would never bring this far and leave me. My God is an awesome God and His favor is incredible! While it may sound like I was strong during such a sacrificial time, I wasn't always so confident. I swear, there were days I would cry for hours on end because I didn't understand something technically or musically. There were PLENTY of days Frank would fuss at me for not understanding how to manage our show and it would put me in tears every time... I wore my emotions on my sleeve and it hurt to fail at something I put my ALL in. I can't recall how many break-down's I had DURING our show because I felt like a failure. I remember hearing from my superiors (like it happened yesterday) that I would NEVER be the producer of the Morning Show. It was a Saturday afternoon and I was working hard to prove to the world I was capable. He called me into his office and in the most non-chalant way told me, "You will never be the producer, you don't have any experience and you don't know enough people. A producer must rely on contacts and you were just an intern, you don't know anyone... This is Atlanta, this is V103, this is the Morning Show and you're not ready. Besides, Frank doesn't even think you could do it." My heart was broken, my spirits were crushed and the tears were on the verge of spilling over uncontrollably. However, I refused to let him see me break. I held them in and nodded. There was nothing to say - there were no words in the world that could change his mind, so I left. I sat in our parking garage and cried for an hour. I felt defeated. I remember writing Frank a 5 page email on my blackberry, just letting all of my feelings out.... then I cried for 3 more hours. Hours later, I received Frank's his very honest AND compassionate reply. He said that he knew I would be one of the greatest producers... in 5 more years. He said, after being in the game for 25 years, he needed a producer who could do it better than he could... and it wasn't my time. He said, my day was coming and he couldn't wait because one day, I'd be good enough to produce Oprah's show... now, just wasn't the time and radio just doesn't work like that. People have to invest years and years to get Morning Show positions on any level, and especially the Producers level. Receiving that email from Frank broke my heart, but I respected his sincerity and honesty. In hindsight, it was probably his email and the fact that no one believed I could go from intern to producer that made me work 10 times harder to prove them wrong. I couldn't be mad at them for doubting me... I was new to the game. However, they didn't know, I am God's Girl and what God had for me, was for me... They didn't know, God would make the impossible, possible in HALF the time. Every bit of drama and pain that happened in my life from my inception was finally making sense to me. God had to take me through the hard times so I would appreciate the good times. God gave me challenges so I would understand what faith was all about. I would not have been able to handle His tests of faith if I didn't have countless practice runs earlier in my life... Everything from my parent's divorce to the custody battles when I was a child to the feelings of insecurity and promiscuity as a teen and the feelings of incompletion as a young woman were some of the "practice runs" to prepare me for what I was currently going thru. Finally, it all made sense and I became so appreciative of every challenge I had endured in life. I was thankful that God invested His time in me to get me ready for His awesome mission. In 2006, God delivered on His promise; I was promoted to the producer of the number 1 Morning Show on V-103, and given a salary. As producer of the Frank & Wanda Morning Show, I do whatever I have to do to make certain they sound flawless. Often times that entails lots of research, event planning, creative thinking, meeting after meeting, constantly on your toes to be bigger and better, non-stop hustling & networking, extremely early mornings, ridiculously late nights and world travel. However, nothing is beneath me! If I have to go get coffee, fetch breakfast or sweep floors so they feel comfortable when they're on the air, I will do just that! I feel so extremely blessed to be around countless years of wisdom & experience every day. To have Frank Ski, the original Doo Doo Brown and the man who has changed the game of urban radio, as MY mentor, MY friend and very much a part of MY family, was God's way of putting me in the very best position to excel and fulfill His purpose. I could not have asked for a better deal, God gave me the BEST deal He had! I’m not going to front; working in the entertainment industry has incredible perks! I never, ever imagined in my wildest dreams I would be able to say, I have chilled at Puffy's house on Star Island in Miami with Natalie Cole, Dallas Austin, Jay-Z, Pharrell, Andre Harrell and others for Puff's birthday, flew first class around the world to Beijing and Hong Kong to enjoy several days in another country, attend the 10 year Reasonable Doubt Anniversary Jay-Z concert in New York City via a private jet, communicate personally with Russell Simmons, Kevin Liles, Hype Williams and other moguls, ride in Bentley's with record label CEO's like Russell Block Spencer and have them consider me their baby sister and would do anything for me at the drop of a dime, and spend hours in T.I.'s home studio listening to music just written and not even released!! Seriously, I could have NEVER imagined this would be my reality, but it most certainly is and it's beyond incredible. But trust me; this isn't what makes my job so amazing. Yes, believe it or not, there is something 20 times better than all of this! Imagine something better than these perks??? Is it even possible? My job and my life are so special because I have the power to influence our community and ultimately, change lives! Because I am "Nina Brown of the Frank & Wanda Morning Show," I am able to walk into any school, demand the attention of a class room full of teens, and they automatically listen because I happen to know every celebrity they’ve ever dreamed about meeting, speak their slang, listen to the same music and have the concert tickets they spent the last 72 hours trying to win on the phone. So what do I do with this power? I get on THEIR level, I LISTEN to what they have to say, I give them the RESPECT they deserve and tell them what they NEED to know about this funny game of life. I talk to them about the importance of staying focused in school, the importance of respecting their parents and teachers, the importance of not having sex too early, the importance of humility and integrity. I talk to them about the importance of having character. I tell them EVERY mistake I made as a teen and young adult and why it's so important for them to learn from my mistakes. I tell them, "don't be me, be better than me". I tell them the results of having a child early, I tell them the results of stealing and getting caught, I tell them the results of mistaking sex for validity. I tell them the HIV epidemic is real! I tell them the results of not going to college right after high school and the struggles of "hustling backwards". I tell young girls, if you feel like you have no one to talk to, you can call me. I tell young boys, you can be anything you want to be, regardless of what society has stereo-typed you to be. I tell other young people, don't be afraid to chase your dreams. I tell single mothers, your life is far from over just because you got pregnant young or because a man left you. I tell everyone, if I could do it as the "girl next door", SO CAN YOU! And this is why I love my job. Because I have the power to influence and inspire thousands and thousands of people. If I can change one person’s life and inspire them to be better and figure out what God's purpose for their life is, I have fulfilled my mission. This is how I show God, I'm grateful for His incredible favor! This is how I say THANK YOU for never giving up on me. God promised me light in my darkest hour and He went beyond the call of duty to deliver His promise. I promise you, what I do isn’t rocket science. Trust me when I tell you, I am no smarter than the next person and no prettier than the last girl. In fact, there may only be ONE thing I have over you... I am fearless! Let me say that again, I AM FEARLESS FROM THE INSIDE OUT!!! I am fearless because God did not put the spirit of fear in me! [2 Timothy 1:7] I wish I could say, I have always known this amazing bible verse or grasped the concept, but unfortunately, I cannot. I just recently understood the depth of the spirit of fear and how it can trap you for a lifetime. In the fall of 2007, during an Inspirational Vitamin we played from Bishop Long called, "It's Time," I heard the words of 2 Timothy 1:7. It took me FIVE times to "hear" Bishop's words. The first 4 times I was listening with my ears... It was the fifth time; I finally listened with my heart and heard EVERYTHING. "Wow," I thought, "God didn't put the spirit of fear in me! It's that easy? So, what am I afraid of? Why do I feel intimidated by others with more experience? Why do I fear failure? Why am I scared to let go of relationships that do not empower me? Why am I afraid of the unknown?" I used to fear death and I used to fear time. I feared dying prematurely and leaving my son without a mother. I feared not having enough time in this world to leave my legacy. I also feared letting go of people who had become a staple in my life but always made me second guess my purpose in life. But between the three men who have changed my ENTIRE life and have truly made me better, Frank Ski, Bishop Eddie Long & Bobby Patterson of 8732 [aka BTown], I realized, God's plan is already set in stone. Divine order is just that, so divine. I am one of God's chosen few and when it's time for me to return home to Him, it's time. He doesn't make mistakes. I can no longer be fearful of letting go of people because God designed me to walk alone physically and survive because I walk with Him spiritually - meaning, I AM NEVER ALONE! Even when life presents the most difficult challenges, I embrace them and immediately begin to look for the hidden blessings because that's the formula God designed. I remember when my Mom was in a bad car crash in December of 2007. As she lay in her hospital bed, barely able to speak, she told me via phone, "I know there is a blessing from God that will come out of this accident". Her words spoke to my heart... My Mom couldn't even walk and could barely talk, but she already knew God's blessings would surface shortly. [FYI, the blessing that surfaced was Christmas of 2007; it was the FIRST time in 15 years that all 5 of her children would come home to Orange County, California to spend Christmas together since she was unable to travel. My Mom said, "If I hadn't been in the car accident, I would have been in Samoa for Christmas and would not have had all of my children with me." Mom said the accident was the best thing that could have happened because it slowed her down and made her appreciate life that much more]. Because I have overcome the spirit of fear, I now fearlessly live my life like tomorrow isn't promised and fearlessly wake up each and every day and thank God for allowing me to be the best person I can be, TODAY. He gave me the most amazing tools to do His work with and I am so thankful! God has given me the ability to paint pictures with words and a remarkable smile that can light up the darkest room. He has given me work ethic and built me tough enough to endure life's rocky roads. He has given me the most astounding mentor, Frank Ski, who allows me to run along side of him to learn by experience, but who will also stop me to make certain I never miss the big picture. He tells me when I've done well and when he's so proud, but he will also tell me what areas need work, so I can always strive to go from good to great to the very, very best. Frank loves me unconditionally and understands, I'm still learning the politics, so when I make mistakes, Frank charges them to my head, and never my heart. To be a "Ski Gul" means we ride or die no matter what. It means when one person eats, we all eat. It means we pull the trigger first and ask questions later. It means, first and foremost, we are family, so we never let the politics or the hate from misguided admirers come between us. Being a Ski Gul means today, tomorrow, forever. God has given me the most amazing, incredibly generous and compassionate mother who has always believed I could do anything I set out to do and has supported me no matter what the dream was - if it was my dream, it was her dream and everyone needs a rock solid person in their corner. To receive her random emails that say, I am so proud of the woman you have become, makes me feel like I can take on the world. She is my biggest cheerleader and thinks I can do no wrong because of my spiritual favor. God has given me an incredible Daddy, who has been a wonderful example of how a man should treat the women in his life and how a real Father takes full responsibility of his seeds. I have eternal memories as a child, of dancing in a sun-lit living room as my Daddy would sing to me as if he were the missing member of the Gap Band. I have eternal memories as an adult, of checking my voicemail and hearing Daddy singing, "I just called to say, I loooove you..." No matter how many times my Daddy and I bump heads; I will never deny the fact that he [Daddy] has given me my foundation & strength. I will forever be Daddy's little girl and the first girl who OWNED his heart. No matter how old I get or how many miles across country I move, I will always be his princess, who always wanted his last bite of food and would rather be up under him than playing outside with other kids. While I am Nina Brown to the world, I am Daddy's skinny, fuzzy-haired, little girl named Mainey.God has given me the most amazing boyfriend, Eric. God is truly amazing... Eric and I were friends for 3 years, dating on and off, before we officially became an item. His love is easy like Sunday morning. We are friends, for real and that's what keeps us laughing. Eric is such a good man; God-fearing, incredible character, honest, loyal, works hard, honors his Mom and takes care of his family. I knew he was the one when I wanted to change my MySpace status and sit my son down and explain the role Eric plays in my life. Eric is truly special... Forever isn't hardly enough time...God has given me my Ski Guls, JeNika & Fashy, who will hold my hand no matter how bad things get. My Ski Guls will give me the shoulder to cry on, the hug to make me feel secure and the push I need to continue on. My Ski Guls don't judge, they tell me how much I'm loved and they can make me laugh on any given day. When God gave me my Ski Guls, he also gave me two best friends and the two big sisters I never had and always needed. God has given me an AMAZING front row of people who know I am capable of lighting the world on fire. And when my little light gets dim or goes out, my friends re-light my fire and say, "Go get em, Nina B!" They don't waiver or ride the fence, they ride or die and pull triggers for me!God has given me BTown (Bobby Patterson of Felix Meuon & 8732), who has shown me the true meaning of character, nobility, strength, love & discipline. To be spiritually connected to BTown assures me we have a life-long friendship. He honestly thinks I'm capable of taking over the world. Often times, I look at him like he's crazy, but he just shakes his head and says, "I'm telling you, Nina B, you're ready" When I do good, he gives me the thumbs up, and when I mess up, he reminds me that my future is so bright, its blinding to others. He tells me to stay focused and shields the haters so I can stay on track. I remember the very day I mentally connected with BTown. On that day, it was the first time in my entire life, I'd met someone whose heart was so, so, so big. I had never met a man who would give another person the shirt off his back or his last dollar without a worry of re-payment. BTown's heart is so genuine. He is an amazing individual and also one of God's chosen few, who has never had the spirit of fear. While Frank and Bishop talked about being fearless, it was BTown who showed me how to LIVE life fearlessly, by his own example. God has given me the most incredible child, who challenges me to be the best mommy I can be. To see Jaylen's smile, receive his random, yet inquisitive questions and hear his growth, verbally, is my physical proof that God's angels are behind the faces of our precious children. Even with his imperfections, Jaylen is the sight of absolute perfection. God gave me Jaylen at 19 years old because He knew only an Angel from the Heavens above would slow me down and get me away from the reckless lifestyle I had adopted during my adolescence. God has given me the most unselfish man as Jaylen's father. Kegan has supported every dream and aspiration since I was a naive 18 year old girl. Kegan's patience has allowed me to transition into the woman I am today. I put Kegan through hell and he continued to show me what unconditional love looked like when I had no idea what unconditional love was. God has given me humility, vision and the strength to stay focused no matter how busy the devil gets. He has given me the gift of LIFE with an abundance of faith... I give Him praise, glory and every bit of my love in return. To everyone reading these very words, I hope I have been able to inspire you. I don't know how you ended up on my page and why you took the time to read this entire thing, but I trust God makes no mistakes and maybe it was destiny for you to be here right now. I would love to hear your story if I've been able to inspire you in any way. You can also email me at [[email protected]] Most importantly, I challenge you to fearlessly live your life and chase your dreams, because God didn’t put the spirit of fear in Nina B, nor you [2 Timothy 1:7]! NOW is the time! Live life and love patiently and kindly [1 Cor 14:3]. God is the SOURCE OF OUR STRENGTH! Love Always, God's Girl, The Black Carrie Bradshaw
