Spokey Doke - ProfilesArchive

About Me

MyGen Profile Generator i am being subjected to bombardment by electromagnetic radiation and energetic particles from the sun and cosmic radiation from outer space!

i don't really have a personality, i prefer watching t.v. i like to buy things that i don't need or want, just because they're advertised, and i like to eat things that have been proven to cause cancer or bowel problems. i think that anyone who earns less money than me is inferior. i read only the advertiser, because i firmly believe that it represents journalistic integrity at its very best and that football is the most important thing in the world - it should account for at least 98% of a newspaper's content. sometimes i wear nappies because i can't be bothered going to the toilet, besides, i wouldn't wanna miss a second of big brother, which gives me ideas for what opinions and clothes i should have

My Interests

. totally into algebra and that. for example: one munny + 4 munnys = fourteenty. plus fully into reading spam and engrish.

Movies:

i only ever go to those to beat off in the back row...

proper movies and that.

Television:

golden moment

Heroes:

Stewie Griffin, Rick Mayall, Adrian Edmonson, Hayao Miyazaki, David Suzuki, the Monty Python crew, Bowie, Derek & Clive, Nigel Quaini, Jim Henson, John Kricfalusi, Warp label, Ricky Gervais, Biggie Shortie, Jean-Pierre Jeunet and Marc Caro, Joss Whedon for giving me something i can hate without guilt, my grandparents - for being strong, surviving war and finding love, Dick Wolf for having a fkn stupid name, dogs, and birds and insects for keeping the planet going. And boobies. you know. just for being there.

My Blog

Dear Paris Hilton

Miss Hilton, I write to you to ask, is your face: a) a bucket of smashed crabs; b) a pie that's been dropped twice; c) a dried up wad of man milk crudely fashioned into a face-shaped lump? HOW THE F...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Wed, 11 Jul 2007 06:21:00 PST

the day my face got broken

Like any good story, this one invloves lengthy innebriated 'intellectual' periods, in which sensible, logical decisions were made. The graph featured below indicates the way in which the intellect di...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Thu, 14 Jun 2007 06:44:00 PST

Fuck you (no. 6) North Adelaide

What the hell is wrong with you North Adelaide? All your retarded streets go the wrong way! Seriously, i can't believe how stupid you are, you reeking piss-stain of a suburb! Riddle me this mother-fk...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Thu, 14 Jun 2007 06:04:00 PST

The simple joy of unintentional dual purpose items

So I like, bought this ring, which was not so amazing that awesomeness was seeping from me in an irrefutable way, but pretty fkn close. And then I found out it doubles up as a pendant. And I'm not eve...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Tue, 05 Jun 2007 02:47:00 PST

Fuck you (no. 5) fridge for not constantly providing me with delicious snacks

I'm drunk, and I'm tired, and all I want is something delicious to eat. How fkn selfish are you that you just sit there, humming as you belligerently eat all MY electricity, which I paid for, without ...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Fri, 18 May 2007 08:40:00 PST

Fuck you (no.4), I have PMS

Far be it from me to dispute the crunchy oily goodness of chips, but seriously, do you think you could try not to endeavour to keep your lips apart, extreme sport style, when you eat them in a place w...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Fri, 18 May 2007 08:26:00 PST

dear mouses

Dear mouse/s I write to thank you for entering my abode without permission. I commend you on your patient ability to bide your time and wait til i have but one morsel of food left in th...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Thu, 05 Apr 2007 07:31:00 PST

the perils of the ocean... my imminent demise.

In the great big wide ocean, wherever there be a patch of seagrass, or any kind of marine vegetation, there lies in wait a ferocious, ravenous blob, whose diet consists of Spokey Doke. Seeing as i am ...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Fri, 09 Feb 2007 09:32:00 PST

fuck you (no. 3) Burnside Village

This week's recipe: 'Stuck Up Bourgeois Bitch' Serves: herself Ingredients: · Black scrunchie, wrapped firmly around firm bun of grey hair ma...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 08:59:00 PST

successful party?

1. go to party2. drink too much beer 3. talk heaps of shit and insult people you don't know 4. walk in on some people fucking. 5. walk in on them again. 6. tell everybody - solely via facial expressio...
Posted by Spokey Doke on Mon, 08 Jan 2007 06:42:00 PST