My name is Artie, The Strongest Man in The World. I really am the strongest man in the world. But aside from being the strongest super hero in the world i'm also a door salesman and bowling champion. My strongest man in the world activities include moving an underpants emporium to Tulsa, Skipping stones off Uranus, surviving dodgeball onslaughts and hitting a golf ball 300,003m from Dads driving range. Being the strongest man in the world is not my only superhuman ability. I also have heat vision which can be harnessed to win staring competitions and in true super hero fashion I also have my very own weakness. Whammy Bars. These have the same effect on Artie as kryptonite has on Super Man. Although i have been described as a mutant on many occasions it has been scientifically proven by Ellen that i am not an alien. After all my mucus is standard colour and i can hop on one leg. my enemies are John McFlemp, an aluminium sidings salesman and Papercut, a school bully. I have also had a run in with a queen bee who was staying in Wellsville for the Summer.
I am seemingly invincible, however, i have been beaten, most notably by an evil bowling ball. The awesome power of the ringing phone was also too much for me, but not for Pete and as we know Pete gets all his super human abilities from Artie.
Apart from all this I lead quite a regular life. Although primarily a super hero, I also have jobs as a salesman and a bowling ball champion (with the help of a psycho-kinetic, hamster powered bowling ball). I live in a port-a-john, my favourite smell is tire gas and my favourite sounds are armpit sounds as they remind me of my mother. I am partial to funk music to which I once danced for 11 days non-stop, listening to his Krebstar 2000 radio. I also do a mean voodoo crispy and diesel jerk. My preferred way of travelling is in a land canoe. I hates cars.
