About Me
Im your average guy with a great sense of Humor. If I cant do anything else i'll make you laugh!I was just thinking............................If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?What do chickens think we taste like?What do people in China call their good plates?What do you call a male ladybug?What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?24 things to make you think!1. A day without sunshine is like night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
6. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.
9. Support bacteria. That's the only culture some people have.
10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. (That's True)
19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, 'What the heck happened?'
22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt too! fantasy layout powered by HOT FreeLayouts.com / MyHotComments
